Messing me around

**snufflepuff** · 02-08-2010, 08:09 AM

One of the parents is really starting to annoy me. Firstly she swapped her LOs Friday to a Thursday but forgot to tell me. Then she gave me a list of days that she needed to move around or add on over the next few weeks- some of those being 2 hours extra on top of her usual hours and also to include a cooked tea. (LO usually goes to her Nan but she is in poor health and having operations so theres a few days when she can't have her)
Now she wants me to swap this Thursday to next Thursday- so only have LO 1 day this week but 3 days next week.
Now, i have always been very flexible, i have never said no to changing things around, but its bothering me now because it happens quite alot and often with little notice. I know lots of people use childminders because of the flexibility, but would it be reasonable for me to say no more swaps, extra days will be charged as such? So if she needs the Wed instead of the Thurs she will still have to pay for both?

**flowerpots** · 02-08-2010, 08:15 AM

its a difficult one because nan has poor health at the mo, is it because of the situation with nan? or did it start before then?

If it has been a regular on-going thing i would charge her for her contracted days and then any extra days on top, what would she do if your were full and didn't have the space?

**mama2three** · 02-08-2010, 08:19 AM

Does she pay a retainer over the other days? If not its time to start saying no occasionally ! Sorry Im not available that day due to x , y or z ( or no reason at all , just NO!) She will soon learn to stop taking you for granted.

I made it clear in my policies that hours / days are as per contract and extra hours will be charged - late drop off does not constitute late pick up for example.

Maybe its time for a contract review - made easier by the fact that if you have had to say no a couple of times then you can say the changes are in her interest!

**funfunfun** · 02-08-2010, 08:21 AM

I would also be chargeing for contracted days regardeless of weather they are used or not ............as with the change or days rugularlly the child is taking a full time place .

I am sympathetic to the situation but as mentioned abovewhen did this start

**curlycathy** · 02-08-2010, 08:21 AM

I think that you need to sit down with her and review the contract. My policy is that if they've booked for Wednesday but want Thursday instead they would pay for both, unless we'd drawn up a proper contract and changed the days. You can be flexible to meet needs, but make it clear that anything extra than whats in the contract will be charged extra. I dont understand how she can swap days and forget to tell you - what if you were full???? I would put a minimum period of time to give you notice to add days/hours etc - say a week, unless its a dire emergency.

Dont be messed around, this is your business and you can do your best to meet the needs of parents but only if they are clear and upfront with you about what those needs are. Good luck!x

**snufflepuff** · 02-08-2010, 08:58 AM

The problems with Nan have been ongoing, its just general old age really, and yes she has been swapping days for ages now.
Its the fact that she always tell me how she has no money, can't do this and that so can't pay for extra days. She makes me feel bad and like i have to let her swap!
Not sure what she would do if i couldn't swap, she wouldn't want to take a day off work and lose the money, i think she would rather send LO to her Nan and let her struggle than pay for an extra day with me!
She has asked me to do 3 days a week in the new year when nan is due to have a big op so won't be able to have LO for at least a few months. She asked me if i can hold the space for her until then but i said no, if someone wants it they can have it!
Perhaps its time for something on the newsletter to say that i will do extra days where i can but that the original contracted day still needs to be paid for.

**moljak** · 02-08-2010, 03:36 PM

I would explain that you have routines that you'd like to keep to and that's what contracted hours allow you to do.You appreciate she may need to swap days but this isn't always beneficial to you and other children and now she needs to keep to contracted days and request extra days when needed.If the days are acceptable to you then of course you will try to accomodate her but this can't always be the case unless she adds them to her contract.Tell her you've had some enquiries recently and really you need to think about your business and your family as she is doing with hers.Then smile sweetly

**Hebs** · 02-08-2010, 04:08 PM

I have a parent who pays for 2 days each week but sometimes i will have her kids 1 day one week and 3 days the next but i dont mind and it was agreed at the initial meeting x

**wendywu** · 02-08-2010, 04:12 PM

I would swap BUT only if it suits me and fits in with my plans

**snufflepuff** · 02-08-2010, 04:38 PM

I was all ready to speak to her at pick up when she said that her tax credits have been cut quite dramatically and shes not sure how they will manage. GRRRR! Can't exactly hit her with more bad news so it will have to wait for another day!

**moljak** · 02-08-2010, 07:11 PM

Originally Posted by snufflepuff

I was all ready to speak to her at pick up when she said that her tax credits have been cut quite dramatically and shes not sure how they will manage. GRRRR! Can't exactly hit her with more bad news so it will have to wait for another day!

This may seem harsh but if her tax credits have been cut it's usually because income has increased.I know it's hard not to get involved in peoples personal problems but we can't work for nothing! I feel very strongly about parents moaning about childcare costs.I think most of us are very cheap especially with the work the EYFS has us doing now.If parents need childcare they should be willing to pay for it.