don't want an argurment what do i say?

**TRACEY1969** · 22-01-2010, 07:54 AM

*****mind for a 20 month old and his parents have has set holidays but didn't know this until i wanted time off in the school holidays. They aren't allowed to take time off in school holidays (which i think this is wrong) she has just posted a holiday rota through my door for August 2010 to July 2011 with dates i am not allowed to have OMG these are the dates
Not allowed to have the following off these dates are called Closed Periods

22 Aug - 4 Sept 2010
10 Oct - 20 Nov 2010
12 Dec - 23 Jan 2011
17 Apr - 7 May 2011
21 May - 4 June 2011

Total of 20 weeks

These are the weeks which are half term hols. i rung her up and said we have to come to some compromise with the holidays because im not allowed to take my kids out of school. I know there are 3 weeks free in August but i have to wait to see what her manager books first as he has 2 weeks off then the staff choose there holidays dates. I told her this isn't fair on me or my family and can anyone else help her out if i choose a closed period, she said no. I sugested that i would find another childminder for her but she wasn't happy. I have tried now im getting mad and she is the type of person who everyone loves and people who listern to her if she said a bad word against me.

Please help me as i don't want this to get out of hand but i am furious with her and feel like handing me notice in after this year.

Tracey

PS just had another letter through me door and she states

" as long as i do my 4 days in closed periods i doesn't matter what days i do as long as i have child care available"

Doesn't this mean i still have to work in my time i have booked off ????

**FizzysFriends** · 22-01-2010, 08:02 AM

I would provisionally arrange for back up CM to be available and then tell the parents the dates you will be off and the details of back CM.

She should have asked you about this before signing contracts not now!

**TRACEY1969** · 22-01-2010, 08:06 AM

my friends a Cm but she is full at the moment but like she said you can't plan that far in advance with other Cms because when it comes to the time they might not have the space for me.

**sweets** · 22-01-2010, 08:12 AM

i personally wouldnt put up with that! did she tell about holidays before you took the child on? we are self employed and shoud be able to take our holiday as and when we want, as long as we give plenty of notice.

i would tell her that im sorry but those holidays dont fit in my my family and that you will take your holidays when you can and give her as much notice as possible and try and recommend another childminder that her child knows.

**singingcactus** · 22-01-2010, 08:12 AM

I'm afraid I would be saying too bad, these are the dates I need for you to arrange back up care because I will be on holiday with my family.
I wouldn't let a parent tell me what time I can spend with only my children. I always take my holidays during school holidays because then my kids are off school and I get to spend quality time with MY kids.
Honestly, don't let her push you around on something this important. You need family time with your kids in order to properly care for her kids - and you need time off over christmas.

**PixiePetal** · 22-01-2010, 08:18 AM

Your business, your rules!

She will just have to work it out another way, if she is so set in HER RULES, I would give notice.

If you were ill she would have to find someone else, she had better start looking!

Getting off my high horse now, she is not being fair. Maybe she does not realise how we work - being self employed. Is this her first child and not used to the ways of childminding?

You need to have a chat with her and try to come to a suitable arrangement to clear things up. What does your contract say about holidays. Why did she not think to mention it before?

Good luck x

**TRACEY1969** · 22-01-2010, 08:19 AM

i am going to make some enquires about nurseries today if they do holiday periods for her instead of asking CMs because they might not have the space when the time comes.

I didn't know anything about the holidays dates when the contact was signed. I also told her when her son starts school she would have the same problem

Tracey

**wendywu** · 22-01-2010, 08:20 AM

She fits in with your established and already running business. She does not alter it to suit just her.

She does not employ you like a nanny.

You have what holidays you want, her working practice is her problem. As long as you give the required notice of them as is stated in the contract.

**TRACEY1969** · 22-01-2010, 08:22 AM

Originally Posted by PixiePetal

Your business, your rules!

She will just have to work it out another way, if she is so set in HER RULES, I would give notice.

If you were ill she would have to find someone else, she had better start looking!

Getting off my high horse now, she is not being fair. Maybe she does not realise how we work - being self employed. Is this her first child and not used to the ways of childminding?

You need to have a chat with her and try to come to a suitable arrangement to clear things up. What does your contract say about holidays. Why did she not think to mention it before?

Good luck x

My contact states you must give 4 weeks notice prior to any holiday and i will be taking 4 weeks off for my holidays.

This is her first child but they are older parents so it was a shock.

**solly** · 22-01-2010, 08:24 AM

I would not let her dictate when you have to take your holiday

I take my holiday when i want to and either the parents take the same time off as me but if that doesnt suit they either find family to do it or i have a small group of cm friends and we all help each other out with holiday cover.

I would certainly now give her your holiday dates and say you will find alternative cover with another minder if she requires it

**wendywu** · 22-01-2010, 08:27 AM

Whats her address....Cloud Cuckoo Land

**ajs** · 22-01-2010, 08:37 AM

i am afraid i agree with everyone else

YOUR BUSINESS YOUR RULES.
i wouldn't look for alternative care for her child that's her business, but what i would do now is book 4 weeks holiday for you and yours and hand her the dates
regardless of what she says, you run your business your way, she does not tell you how to.

have you got any other mindees

**Pudding Girl** · 22-01-2010, 08:45 AM

It simply doesn't work that way, I think she has misunderstood that you are a self employed person not their nanny who they can dictate to in this respect.

I assume you have just this one mindee then as when you have more than one you cannot possibly all co-ordinate holidays so someone always has to sort out aternative care.

I have had 8 families all at once and not one of them co-incided! They get told when I am taking holidays and sort any care out themselves.

**TRACEY1969** · 22-01-2010, 08:49 AM

Originally Posted by Pudding Girl

It simply doesn't work that way, I think she has misunderstood that you are a self employed person not their nanny who they can dictate to in this respect.

I assume you have just this one mindee then as when you have more than one you cannot possibly all co-ordinate holidays so someone always has to sort out aternative care.

I have had 8 families all at once and not one of them co-incided! They get told when I am taking holidays and sort any care out themselves.

i have this one 3 days a week, my grandson 1 day and a new mindee starting April for 2 days

**TRACEY1969** · 22-01-2010, 08:56 AM

she has just rung me about the rota. I told her if i choose a holiday when its a closed period i will give her some telephone numbers so she can make arrangments, she said what if they haven't got spaces and i said i have given her plenty of notice to sort child care out ( 12 months notice do you think thats enough lol)

Tracey

**Mouse** · 22-01-2010, 09:02 AM

Like you said, you don't want an argument over this, so I wouldn't be confrontational and say you won't do it.

I would phone her or write a letter & take a softer approach. Say you have considered the dates she has given you, but you're sorry to say you cannot arrange your holidays around them. Talk a bit about being self employed and explain about not being able to please everyone all the time when it comes to holiday times (give the example of if you had several families, you couldn't suit them all). Then give her some alternatives - other cms, holiday schemes etc.
Be firm, but fair. At the end of the day, if she's not happy she can go somewhere else, but she's very unlikely to get a cm who would agree to her dates.

It could be that she doesn't fully understand how a childminder works and isn't being funny with you, telling you how to run your business. When I discuss holidays with new parents I do ask if they know what their own arrangements are about taking time off (how much notice do they need to give, are there any times they can't take off, would they want alternative care if I was on holiday or would they take time off etc).

**miffy** · 22-01-2010, 09:28 AM

Originally Posted by Mouse

Like you said, you don't want an argument over this, so I wouldn't be confrontational and say you won't do it.

I would phone her or write a letter & take a softer approach. Say you have considered the dates she has given you, but you're sorry to say you cannot arrange your holidays around them. Talk a bit about being self employed and explain about not being able to please everyone all the time when it comes to holiday times (give the example of if you had several families, you couldn't suit them all). Then give her some alternatives - other cms, holiday schemes etc.
Be firm, but fair. At the end of the day, if she's not happy she can go somewhere else, but she's very unlikely to get a cm who would agree to her dates.

It could be that she doesn't fully understand how a childminder works and isn't being funny with you, telling you how to run your business. When I discuss holidays with new parents I do ask if they know what their own arrangements are about taking time off (how much notice do they need to give, are there any times they can't take off, would they want alternative care if I was on holiday or would they take time off etc).

I agree with this - it doesn't sound as though she has any idea how a childminder works. Explaining that you would not be able to fit in with all your parents holiday dates might help. At the end of the day though it's her problem not yours.

Good luck, hope you can sort it out amicably.

Miffy xx

**nikim** · 22-01-2010, 09:47 AM

i agree with what everyone else has said , is she expecting you to work christmas day also???, and what happens if you are ill , i think that if she wont agree to your holidays and makes things difficult then maybe you should consider giving notice, personally i think she would do better to use a nursery if she is needing childcare year round ,

**funfunfun** · 22-01-2010, 09:48 AM

I would be saying ............YOU choose when YOU have holidays !!!

The mindee's parents dont choose as long as you give them some sort of notice thats fine

Its your bussiness ad you have the right to a holiday as much as the next person

Cheek of it

chin up

Im sure you will work somthing out

**The Juggler** · 22-01-2010, 02:10 PM

how dare she. she cannot tell you you can't have hols. she can ask nicely! I would smile politely and say this was not discussed at contract signing or a compromise would have been reached. You will accommodate her as best you can but you will book your holidays and help her find alternative care if necessary.

surely they can't BOTH be in this position??? do they work in the same office.