do you change a pooey nappy on arrival?

**newandlearning** · 02-06-2009, 05:21 PM

Hi.. just wondering what you do when a parent brings toddler with pooey nappy..

the first time it happend she came in and told me .. oh he's done a parcel for you

.. well stupidly I first thought she meant a gift.. well I changed it but felt very put upon.

last week she brought him with a pooey nappy and didn't mention it.. after she left I realised he'd done a poo and it was soo caked on it was evident that it had been there more than 5 mins.

today.. he came again with another pooey nappy.. first I smelt my child and then I checked hers and found he'd done a poo.. she looked done and said oh its ****! well I said would you mind changing him for me so I can get the other boys in the car (as I've still gotta take my boy to preschool and get even later if I then have to change her child too)...

anyway.. sorry for ranting.. but would you get parent to change her child as well.. I think if I don't do it this way I'm just gonna feel put upon.. she also wants me to start potty training him when he happily poos without showing any bother about the sensation or the smell.. which to me means he's really not ready for potty training.. anyway.. I've agreed to put him on the potty after each nappy change which is fine.

So far I'm brushing his teeth after lunch, changing nappy, getting him to try the potty .. washing hands and then putting Aveeno cream on him.. am I becoming a second mum or is this part of childminding????

thanks for reading.. and even more so if you reply.xx

**sarah707** · 02-06-2009, 05:24 PM

It's childminding as far as I am concerned.

I do everything and more because it's my job and I try to be as professional as possible.

I get parents regularly dropping children off who've done a poo in the car... but then they are early enough so I can get them changed before going on the school run.

If timing is your problem then maybe you need to speak to the parents about changing their hours so you have time to sort their child and you're not running late.

Would that help do you think?

**sonia ann** · 02-06-2009, 05:37 PM

Originally Posted by newandlearning

......am I becoming a second mum or is this part of childminding????

I like to think that i'm a second mum to all my mindees......and yes I do think it is part of childminding........it's why I do this job

**Straws** · 02-06-2009, 05:41 PM

Yep I agree with Sarah, its childminding thats what you get paid for, I often have children who poo in the car on there way to my house.

I'd ask the parent to drop off a few more minutes early so you have time to change him.

Straws x

**Andrea08** · 02-06-2009, 05:43 PM

both hun but i do understand

parents should clean their children before they arrive at the setting but there are times i have children arrive in the same s*!* they went to bed in!

as long as we do our best by the children and try to help and support parents and families,

xxxx

**ORKSIE** · 02-06-2009, 05:48 PM

I have been told in the past "oh he did it in the car" and as far as i'm concerned Thats fine I will clean it.
I have had mindees turn up late and mum says "He filled his nappy as I was about to leave" they certainly get their timing right

If a child turned up with caked on poo I would not be happy, but if they did it in transit then I would change them without a thought.

**PixiePetal** · 02-06-2009, 05:59 PM

Part and parcel of the job, if it's making you late I would ask for a bit longer in the mornings. It is quite common as they have usually just had breakfast and body gets working.

If I need to leave prompt after arrivals in the morning I would ask for an earlier drop off If I need to leave by 8.45 I would like all children in by 8.30 for instance to allow for nappies/wees/putting on raincoats when parents walk in carrying them

I can change a nappy far quicker than most parents anyway

**ORKSIE** · 02-06-2009, 06:21 PM

Originally Posted by PixiePetal

I can change a nappy far quicker than most parents anyway

I think we should all have a race to see whos the fastest pooper scooper

TheBTeam · 02-06-2009, 06:32 PM

Personally i would rather change it than the parents, i have had one on collection who wanted to change the poo that the child did as she arrived, i offered to do it, she said 'no' and proceeded to change him on my carpet ignoring the mat that i had given!!!

Another one insists on changing on her lap with bits dropping off, so there is no way i want that in my house!

**PixiePetal** · 02-06-2009, 06:47 PM

Originally Posted by TheBTeam

Personally i would rather change it than the parents, i have had one on collection who wanted to change the poo that the child did as she arrived, i offered to do it, she said 'no' and proceeded to change him on my carpet ignoring the mat that i had given!!!

Another one insists on changing on her lap with bits dropping off, so there is no way i want that in my house!

**Curly Quavers** · 02-06-2009, 07:13 PM

Originally Posted by sarah707

It's childminding as far as I am concerned.

I do everything and more because it's my job and I try to be as professional as possible.

I get parents regularly dropping children off who've done a poo in the car... but then they are early enough so I can get them changed before going on the school run.

I agree,

When I used to put my girls to a minder my younger was still in nappies and ofter she was clean when we left and pooped by the time I got there.

If she is dropping the child off on time then she obviously she has work to go to and that is when your day with that child begins. It's not nice but part of the job.

**Mouse** · 02-06-2009, 07:23 PM

I agree with what the others have said. One of my mindees often used to turn up with a dirty nappy. The mum alway offered to change it, but I said no. I just accepted it as being part of the job.

I suppose looking at it the other way though, I would never send a child home with a dirty nappy. One of the current mindees always does a yucky nappy just as mum arrives to pick him up. I could hand him over & say 'there you go, he's just filled his nappy' (as my son's nursery used to do!), but I don't, I always change him before he leaves.

**OrlandoBelle** · 02-06-2009, 07:33 PM

I have had babies turn up in there PJ's at 8am and have been told to change them into their clothes as the mum's running late and didn't have time... also babies with nappies full to bursting that MUST have been on from the night before. Those are the times I feel slightly put upon. But if a child comes to me in the morning having just done a poo, i really don't mind. It's part of my job and i'd rather have it out of the way in the morning, then in the afternoon when you're in the middle of a park or somewhere with no amenities! That's providing they only have one a day!!

**mushpea** · 02-06-2009, 07:35 PM

I always change dirty nappys on arrival, never bothers me cause feel it is part of my job.
on the other end of the scale i have one little boy whos mum meets me at school in the afternoon to collect hm and you can garuntee somwhere on the way he poops and she often picks him up smelly!!

i hate handing them back yucky cause i worry the parent thinks his bin like it all day, shes fine though and has never said anything bad about it and i do offer to clean him up.l

**Daftbat** · 02-06-2009, 07:39 PM

I don't mind about it really. Children can't help pooing on their way to see us and often they have just had their breakfast at home which can initiate it anyway. I have never asked a parent to change their child - in fact i have insisted on doing it just before they have left me in a evening if a poo has just materialised. I like to send them home fed, watered and clean.

As far as potty training goes - i think we have to work with the parents and decide together what the best strategy is and when a child is ready to start. We are second mums to these children in lots of ways.

**manjay** · 02-06-2009, 07:44 PM

I have absolutely no problem with changing nappies done in transit but I do object to ones that have very obviously been there for much longer than the 2 minutes it takes to get to me!! I would never dream of sending a child home dirty

but then there are lots of things that I would not do but parents don't see as a problem!

**Twinkles** · 02-06-2009, 07:47 PM

I kind of know where you are coming from here. I have one toddler who is often bought to me with a pooey nappy and when I change it it's obvious it hasn't just been done and he only lives over the road. I'm fairly sure dad just leaves it for me to change

**newandlearning** · 02-06-2009, 09:00 PM

wow.. what a lot of responses .. my mindees mum pays me from 9am but always gets to me around 9.10 or later.. and my lil boy has to be at preschool for 9.15.. he misses circle time and all the beginning bit of preschool and although changing a pooey nappy doesn't take long .. it just feels like its another thing I have to do .. which gets in the way of me looking after my own child... from everyones responses it sounds like I'm missing the point.. I think I would mind a lot less if he was brought to me earlier but as she has to drop her daughter off at school first she always gets to me late.. I may ask if she'd be happy to start the day sooner.

Pipsqueak · 02-06-2009, 09:24 PM

Originally Posted by newandlearning

wow.. what a lot of responses .. my mindees mum pays me from 9am but always gets to me around 9.10 or later.. and my lil boy has to be at preschool for 9.15.. he misses circle time and all the beginning bit of preschool and although changing a pooey nappy doesn't take long .. it just feels like its another thing I have to do .. which gets in the way of me looking after my own child... from everyones responses it sounds like I'm missing the point.. I think I would mind a lot less if he was brought to me earlier but as she has to drop her daughter off at school first she always gets to me late.. I may ask if she'd be happy to start the day sooner.

If parent is due to arrive at nine and doesn't then I would leave - because no way would I be allowing my child to miss his precious time at nursery/school.
Think you need to talk to parent, saying that they need to get to you earlier as you HAVE to leave for school no later than xxx time and if they arrive to you after this then they will either have to wait on the doorstep for you or meet you at the school.

**Curly Quavers** · 02-06-2009, 09:28 PM

Originally Posted by Pipsqueak

If parent is due to arrive at nine and doesn't then I would leave - because no way would I be allowing my child to miss his precious time at nursery/school.
Think you need to talk to parent, saying that they need to get to you earlier as you HAVE to leave for school no later than xxx time and if they arrive to you after this then they will either have to wait on the doorstep for you or meet you at the school.

I completely agree you should tell your parent that give her the option 8.50 start or after 9.15