how do you connect with other CMs

**newandlearning** · 21-05-2009, 12:20 PM

hi ya.. I've been childminding since October, 08, and have met many childminders in my area.. some aren't planning on doing much EYFS so I don't find them very inspiring.. others I think are lovely but are already working together so I feel like I can't get into their group etc etc... I met some childminders who were nice but then began to meet up without me.. and one I really liked but who moved...

I sorta feel like I just need to go with the process and over time will meet peep that will be happy for me to become part of their childminding circle.. but I just wondered how the rest of you work.. I find going to too many groups doesn't leave me enough time to as many things as I'd like the kids to experience with me in our setting but then sometimes working at home an feel a little remote..

any advice would be great!

thanks a lotx

**Chatterbox Childcare** · 21-05-2009, 12:24 PM

I am the Area Representative for our local childminding group. You should be able to get details of any meetings in your area through the CIS/FIS.

Just keep going out to toddler groups/schools etc and you will get more involved.

**hello kitty** · 21-05-2009, 01:08 PM

It's horrible being new at any job and trying to set up a network of like minded people is difficult. I found attending training was useful and you do come across some same faces on courses. Attending toddler groups etc will also get you known not only to other minders but possible customers too. Keep you options open and keep chatting on here, there's is plenty of support about.

**Helen Dempster** · 21-05-2009, 01:11 PM

Exactly the same for me! I've given up on the so-called childminding groups in my area cos they've obviously known each other for ages and are very clicky. I feel very much an outsider - I stopped going. Instead, I just do my own thing really and go to various other groups where people are more approachable(?) Whereabouts are you based?? Like you, I met a lovely childminder, but she's in the process of giving up! As Kevin the teenager would say "IT'S SOOOOO UNFAIR!!!!"

H x

**youarewhatyoueat** · 21-05-2009, 01:14 PM

With great difficulty!!!! I go to a childminder drop in at a local childrens centre but the one girl barely opens her mouth and looks terrified if I speak to her the other girl is lovely but has been minding for ages and does her own thing. I go to toddler groups but made the mistake of saying that I was doing the eyfs to one childminder I met and how it was going for them and they said they didn't do it!!! The other girls in my area there is only a few have so many children they don't leave the house they have a play room so i've never met them. I do try to network at training days but the last two sessions i've been on i'm the only childminder out of 30 girls the rest are all from nurseries.
Where are you,i'm in the cotswolds maybe your near me.
Caroline

Daddy Day Care · 21-05-2009, 01:50 PM

I'm lucky in the way that I became friends with a dozen plus childminders before I even thoguht about registering, it was them who convinced me to do it.

I met them and became friends with them through various "mums" and tots groups that i go to. It may have helped because im a man and got instnat attention there but I didnt find anyone clicky everyone was really friendly and went out of there way to help me.

have you asked on here if theres any near you? im sure there must be and that mgiht be a start for you

Gareth
xx

**HomefromHome** · 21-05-2009, 02:56 PM

i was like that and it took a lot of persuading from my dw to go the group i went to.... as it happened the group splintered (they were very clicky!) and now me and another cm who are fairly new to the game took over the running of it!! (still not quite sure how that happened)
we're now affiliated to our county childminding assoc!
is their a county childminding group for your area?? sorry i didnt look to see where you lived...
or ncma might have a group...
or as said before, ask direct on here!!!

**HomefromHome** · 21-05-2009, 02:57 PM

Originally Posted by Daddy Day Care

I'm lucky in the way that I became friends with a dozen plus childminders before I even thoguht about registering, it was them who convinced me to do it.

I met them and became friends with them through various "mums" and tots groups that i go to. It may have helped because im a man and got instnat attention there but I didnt find anyone clicky everyone was really friendly and went out of there way to help me.

have you asked on here if theres any near you? im sure there must be and that mgiht be a start for you

Gareth
xx

and the fact that you're willing to dance like a fairy might have something....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! still waiting for them pics!!!!! hehehe

**huggableshelly** · 21-05-2009, 03:11 PM

ummm well ....

i go to the childrens centre for monthly meetings without mindees
we dont tend to meet up at other groups as we all do different things and have differ age groups so i meet others at other play sessions which i do not do on a regular basis as routine bores me to death so building friendships within a cm group hasnt happened as such for me but all cms here are friendly, some team up in 2's or 3's but include anyone else who is there and feeling chatty

i think at times i just muscle in but i have never been anywhere where i felt uncomfortable

hopefully you will find it easier soon, if those who are not doing much for EYFS are friendly enough then no harm in hanging out with them ... doesnt mean you have to take yourself down to their level, stick to doing what suits you.

**wendywu** · 21-05-2009, 04:03 PM

Minders in are area are very friendly and are ready to welcome new CM. But it may have someting to do with there still being plently of work in our area so there is no conflict of interests.

**Buzz Lightyear** · 21-05-2009, 04:41 PM

The minders in my little village aren't very friendly at all which I just find odd to be honest. Why wouldn't they want support from other minders in the area??

I've managed to find some lovely minders on here who live just up the road (you both know who you are!) and then just general getting out and about at toddler groups, etc.

I hope you manage to find some other minders soon who are a lot nicer than the ones you've currently described

**jeanybeany** · 21-05-2009, 06:01 PM

Most minders in my area keep themselves to themselves. I'm now good friends with a cm who rang me up out of the blue to ask for advice when setting up, apparently someone in the shoe shop in town gave her my number and said "I was lovely". No idea who they were, otherwise I'd have them advertising for me

. Anyway I invited her along to toddlers and we've been friends for almost a year now. It's great and I don't feel so lonely anymore.

**Gizmo** · 21-05-2009, 06:12 PM

There is a cm group that I have been invited to once i'm reg and I have met some of them and they seem ok, they have all been cm's for years, I am quite lucky that there is another girl in our village who is at the same stage of reg as me and we are going to be each other emergency contact and we have been going on a training course together. Good to have someone else to moan too

**Ripeberry** · 21-05-2009, 06:40 PM

I try to go regularly to a CM group even though i don't have any mindees! But sometimes it conflicts with the pre-school when i'm needed to help out.
I don't mind coming in and helping to set up, do a bit of craft with the children and then prepare snacks and wash up!
I still get to have a chat but it's interesting listening to their conversations.
Just not sure of the CM etiquette yet about other CM's mindees as i automaticaly go to a child who is crying (used to doing it at pre-school), then i think "Wait am i allowed to help?"
Don't want to step on any toes yet

TheBTeam · 21-05-2009, 07:24 PM

I go to a childminding group, it takes a while to become part of the group and originally i thought that it was clicky, but having gone for a while i realised that it was okay for me to join in and be part, and that they were happy to have another active member of the group. I am now firm friends with at least 3 of the other minders and we meet regularly and the children are friends and we use each other for back up.

I sometimes think clickiness is actually just them catching up with each other and they would still be quite happy to involve someone new, it just takes time sometimes for groups of childminders to suss out new people. Our group takes to people, but we like to spend time checking that people we reveal all of our stuff to are actually serious about being part of the group and are willing to join in and share their stuff as well, we don't like the minders that come to our group take our ideas/free stuff etc but don't give/share their experiences in return.

Take your time i am sure that there is a group happy to have new willing members near you. Support from other likeminded childminders i find invaluable and would hate to be isolated at home, it is nice to have both or you will feel very isolated, especially in the tougher times.

**helenlc** · 21-05-2009, 08:36 PM

I worked as a nanny to twins before I became a childminder, so I was already a familiar face at the locla parent and toddler groups etc.

I have found our cm drop in group very accomodating but we have not had any new faces join for 6 months or more so I can see how it might seem awkward to someone walking in when we are so familiar with one another.

Just keep going to activites at the childrens centre, toddler groups etc and make yourself known. Dont be scared to approach people either - they might be thinking the same as you.

**newandlearning** · 25-05-2009, 06:17 PM

thanks a lot ladies for all your replies...
this is a great group and have gained a lot of confidence by popping
in here every nowandagain.. xx

Daddy Day Care · 25-05-2009, 06:24 PM

Originally Posted by newandlearning

thanks a lot ladies for all your replies...
this is a great group and have gained a lot of confidence by popping
in here every nowandagain.. xx

Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy, I replied as well

**ORKSIE** · 25-05-2009, 06:29 PM

In my area we have Toddler groups where us CM's meet up, we also have our own CM group which is held in our local Childrens Centre once a week, this allows the children to play with new resourses,and other children outside "their" CM setting, and us CM's to get together, giving suport when necessary.
We also meet at the Local Library for Singing

I also belong to a Network, where us Network CM's can get together with our CoOrdinator where there is lots of help, support and we also have people from other aspects of childcare giving us talks and advise