Seperation Anxiety?

[madredann]

Hi
Happy New Year to you all I need some advice!!!!!

I have a new starter just turned 1 mum has gone back to work after having a year off. Mum works shifts, little one has been coming for A WEEK lol. She is an absolute darling doesnt cry when left by mum or dad and they say goodbye to her she doesnt cry when put for a sleep sits until goes off, wakes up with a smile really happy. She wakes up at 5-5.30 am in the morning and has a sleep about 1-1 and a half hours after waking in the morning the first time I put her in the travel cot she lay for a while but then cried so I picked her up and put her in the buggy and pushed it for a bit and she fell asleep. i did this because I didnt want her to get soo upset in the cot that she would never go in it and thought perhaps she didnt feel safe enough yet as she hadnt been coming long. She then has a sleep in the afternoon after lunch for an hour to an hour and a half which again she fell asleep in the pushchair as that is when we go for our freshair walk. I have had no problems and have done exactly what mum has asked and managed to get these 2 sleeps in and if anything she has had less sleep. Mum texts me and says she is having terrible trouble getting her to sleep in the day she will go down ok at night but is waking at midnight and not going back off till 4am! Could this be Seperation anxiety or a reaction to the massive change in her routine? please advise as I feel I have done something wrong xx

[Goatgirl]

Hi ,
First of all, you have done nothing wrong . Secondly, it is quite normal for you to feel anxious about a new starter, especially if you feel the parent is acting as though her attendance at your setting is what's causing problems at home. Her anxiety is also quite normal, if somewhat misdirected. She will have all sorts of emotions about having to leave her lo .

Of course little one will take a while to get used to the new routines and environment, not to mention build new relationships. She will adjust. Mum may well be acting differently around her because of her own anxiety and feeling bad for leaving little one to go back to work herself, so I'm sure the changes in sleeping are most likely just a normal reaction to alot of changes.

I would reassure Mum that its probably an adjustment to the changes, but handled well i.e. Mum making a concerted effort to keep her time with Lo calm and happy (anxiety/guilt - free) and not giving lots of attention to an awake-at-night-time baby: very tempting I expect , lo should soon settle back to her usual sleeping patterns.

'course it could also just be teething, a growth spurt, an ear infection or one of the myriad of reasons little ones wake up at night... etc.

She may just want reassurance Mum is there when she cries/ wakes up and will settle down as she gets used to the new patterns of when she is with Mum and when she is with you. If asked for advice I would say to keep to little ones new routine at home as closely as possible to provide reassurance . ( and reassure Mum that you are doing x,yand z at your setting to get baby used to you and the environment.)

Good luck