I am soooo cross, I could cry :(

**Toothfairy** · 04-12-2012, 08:47 AM

I sent learning journals home at the weekend and asked for them to be bought back this week.
Mindee came today and Dad said "I'm very sorry but I have run over the folder and it was so badly damaged, I have thrown it in the bin!" Apparently he put the mindee's bag down which had the folder in, while he strapped mindee into his car seat, then forgot it and reversed over the bag.

This folder had nearly 2 years worth of ob's, end of term assessments, art work etc etc in it!
I've about half of it saved on my laptop but some of the stuff was hand written (before I started doing it on the laptop), I have photos of some of the art work but not all of it, as I like a mixture of photos and real art work.

But what really made me cross was his 'couldn't care less, it's only a silly folder' attitude.

I have put hours of work into that folder

**mushpea** · 04-12-2012, 08:50 AM

silly man, obviously dosent realise all the hardwork thats gone in to it and of course it would have been a lovley account of the childs time with you, sadly there are parents that dont care about their childrens learning though . prehaps you should get this particular parent to sign to say they dont want a learning journey or record of their childs learning whilst with you.

**sarah707** · 04-12-2012, 08:59 AM

Oh hunny I really feel for you I would be so cross if something like that happened to one of mine.

It is one of the reasons I don't send them home any more - a mum dropped a full cup of coffee over one of mine a few years ago

Live and learn - from now on they come in the house to read them.

Ask him to fish it out of the bin - the folder will have protected some of the contents.

Hugs xx

**loocyloo** · 04-12-2012, 09:13 AM

i would be really sad too.

a few years ago, a child was leaving and the parents gave me back the A5 folder that i use for daily diaries saying 'we don't need it any more, thought you'd like it back' ... i discovered that they had thrown away 2 years worth of diary! they did read it each day, and write me notes, but i was sad for the child. ( pre EYFS, otherwise i dread to think! )

parents only get to see LJs when i am there! either at my house, or at theirs.

**hectors house** · 04-12-2012, 09:41 AM

Absolutely heart breaking - pity his expensive ipod or sat nav wasn't also in the bag!

**Toothfairy** · 04-12-2012, 09:59 AM

I did ask if there was anything that could have been saved but he just laughed and said "well if there was, it's had 3 days of rubbish ontop of it now"

I will replace as much as I can but I don't have copies of all of it.

You're right Sarah, from now on LJ's stay in the house! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

**francinejayne** · 04-12-2012, 10:14 AM

aw how sad, and what a terrible attitude for the dad to have, I feel for you I really do.

being completely honest now, and I may get shot down for saying this, but if I knew I wasn't due an Ofsted inspection whilst the child were with me then I don't think I would be going back and backdating everything and printing it all off again (which in reality will probably take you a full weekend) as eventually the day that the child leaves you it doesn't seem like the parents will value and treasure all the work you will be doing anyway!

**silvermist** · 04-12-2012, 10:23 AM

OMG! I am so sorry this has happened and I would be really upset too. I think its his attitude that would get to me though, like Sarah says, keep the LJs at yours now and invite parents to see them their.I would still want it out of the bin, I really hope you can save something from it.
I would also maybe document what happened somewhwere that way if Ofsted should ever query lack of contents you can explain what happened. And get Dad to sign it too. Sending hugs xxxx

**rickysmiths** · 04-12-2012, 10:42 AM

There is no way I would go backwards for this parent. I certainly would not be redoing something he had so lightly thrown in the bin.

I would actually highly recommend using the Early Years Daily Diary instead for these parents. It isn't cheap but it allows for minimal obs and photos to be put in and out line planning. It also asks the parents to put in weekend stuff.

Early-Years-Daily-Diary it can be bought on amazon as well.

I would also write to the parents and say you are very disappointed that the folder has been thrown away as you would have been able to transfer all the information into a new one and it represented years of hard work in time and expense in printing of text and photos for you to do for them as a record of their child's development and their time with you recording what they had done and where they had been.

As it would seem they really do not want this you will be changing and very much simplifying the way you will be doing this in future.

I would then get the diary in the link and use that, explain that if they loose or damage it it will cost £20 to replace.

If they don't want it then do a letter for them to sign to that effect and do the min of recording for yourself so Ofsted can see.

**JCrakers** · 04-12-2012, 11:03 AM

I would be so so cross

I would actually make an appointment to speak to him and actually tell him how much work you had put in,how much it meant to you and how upset you are. Make him feel really,really bad.

I would be livid at his attitude more than the running over of the folder. Can't believe his attitude, what a complete idiot

**Toothfairy** · 04-12-2012, 11:06 AM

Originally Posted by francinejayne

aw how sad, and what a terrible attitude for the dad to have, I feel for you I really do.

being completely honest now, and I may get shot down for saying this, but if I knew I wasn't due an Ofsted inspection whilst the child were with me then I don't think I would be going back and backdating everything and printing it all off again (which in reality will probably take you a full weekend) as eventually the day that the child leaves you it doesn't seem like the parents will value and treasure all the work you will be doing anyway!

I'm due my inspection in March, so I need to replace it

**JCrakers** · 04-12-2012, 11:08 AM

On a similar note..I went on a course last week and was told that the LJ belongs to the child...so if they are covered in dirt, ripped a bit that's better than having a clean one as it shows you are letting the children look at it....I couldn't help feeling slightly nervous about giving my ljs to the kids....got a sweat on thinking about it...lol

I make them available at all times if they want to look through them but letting them take them into the playroom and play and mess them up...all my hard work..,

He could have just given it back, surely it wasn't all damaged, just the folder.
Get a letter written telling him exactly what you feel

**Toothfairy** · 04-12-2012, 11:16 AM

Originally Posted by rickysmiths

There is no way I would go backwards for this parent. I certainly would not be redoing something he had so lightly thrown in the bin.

I would actually highly recommend using the Early Years Daily Diary instead for these parents. It isn't cheap but it allows for minimal obs and photos to be put in and out line planning. It also asks the parents to put in weekend stuff.

Early-Years-Daily-Diary it can be bought on amazon as well.

I would also write to the parents and say you are very disappointed that the folder has been thrown away as you would have been able to transfer all the information into a new one and it represented years of hard work in time and expense in printing of text and photos for you to do for them as a record of their child's development and their time with you recording what they had done and where they had been.

As it would seem they really do not want this you will be changing and very much simplifying the way lyou will be doing this in future.

I would then get the diary in the link and use that, explain that if they loose or damage it it will cost £20 to replace.

If they don't want it then do a letter for them to sign to that effect and do the min of recording for yourself so Ofsted can see.

I do a daily diary too, its sent home everyday, which was also in the bag. It's a bit squashed and some pages are torn and muddy but it can still be used.
It was his learning journal which was thrown away. I send it home at the end of each term for a weekend, so parents can look through it and add any comments about their child's progress (never any comments!).
Mum is collecting today so will have a word with her.
What makes me cross is both mindee's parents are teachers, they know how important the folder is and that Ofsted will want to look at it

**k1rstie** · 04-12-2012, 11:23 AM

Originally Posted by sarah707

Oh hunny I really feel for you I would be so cross if something like that happened to one of mine.

It is one of the reasons I don't send them home any more - a mum dropped a full cup of coffee over one of mine a few years ago

Live and learn - from now on they come in the house to read them.

Ask him to fish it out of the bin - the folder will have protected some of the contents.

Hugs xx

I had a new parent starting and sent home parent pack/ permission slips etc to sign. It had taken hours to print.

She was reading it in the garden, then had to pop in. Then it rained!! She did dry it out, but only the black ink remained - all the beautiful headers and footers, pictures, information sheets had washed away!

It made me sad too!

I feel for you

**eddie** · 04-12-2012, 11:31 AM

Disgusting attitude from the parents - feel so sorry for you, all that hard work and so little respect for it.

**rickysmiths** · 04-12-2012, 11:35 AM

Originally Posted by k1rstie

I had a new parent starting and sent home parent pack/ permission slips etc to sign. It had taken hours to print.

She was reading it in the garden, then had to pop in. Then it rained!! She did dry it out, but only the black ink remained - all the beautiful headers and footers, pictures, information sheets had washed away!

It made me sad too!

I feel for you

Now I always sit down with the parents to sign all the permission forms etc so I can explain everything to them at the same time. I make an appointment for them to come to me childless or I go to their home. I warn them the process of signing the contract etc will take an hour at least. I never trust parents with forms at home because in the pst I have ones who have taken them all and then are never to be seen again or I only get half back. It is such a faff I do it with them now.

**lilac_dragon** · 04-12-2012, 12:33 PM

Originally Posted by silvermist

OMG! I am so sorry this has happened and I would be really upset too. I think its his attitude that would get to me though, like Sarah says, keep the LJs at yours now and invite parents to see them their.I would still want it out of the bin, I really hope you can save something from it.
I would also maybe document what happened somewhwere that way if Ofsted should ever query lack of contents you can explain what happened. And get Dad to sign it too. Sending hugs xxxx

I think Silvermist is right - if Ofsted decided to come next week they'd be expecting to see the LJ, but why should you pay out in ink,paper etc to re-do it!
Write something explaining what happened and get the Dad to sign it so that you're covered. What a shame for you.

**hectors house** · 04-12-2012, 12:58 PM

One of my LJ is a mindees home at the moment - I sent it home with the 2 year development check, but I stressed to the mum that I have a copy of the development check saved on the computer and I have photos saved, but I don't have the observations as I write them all by hand, and that she should guard it with her life as I won't and couldn't re-writing it.

**LauraS** · 04-12-2012, 02:08 PM

I'd be upset about the learning journal being ruined, but acccidents happen, right? But I'd be absolutely gutted about it flippantly being thrown away like that, particularly.given the fact that the parent know the importance of the thing and the love and effort that goes into them. I would find it hard not to interpret it as reflecting dads view of my role

**linda2girls** · 04-12-2012, 02:27 PM

I don't understand why he threw it in the bin, surely something could have been saved. What an idiot.

I really feel for you, I would be gutted.

Linda.