CHild gets upset and is sick. What to do?

**jo.jo76** · 31-10-2012, 08:47 AM

I don't know what I should do.
I'm settling a new child, he's 12months, he's only here from 8 till 12.

He cried 8 till 10 on Monday which was his first day, I was supposed to give him breakfast but he got so upset and was reaching and then sick with what he had managed to eat while still sitting in the chair, he was fine after and eventually settled, so just explained to mum what happened.

Today he arrives and has already had his breakfast because of what happened monday, he's now got himself in such a pickle that he has been reaching and then brought back all his breakfast!! I know it's only because he is upset but should I just carry on trying to settle him if he is making himself sick like this.

**mushpea** · 31-10-2012, 09:59 AM

how old is the child? do you think he seems well in himself and is just being sick because he's upset?
I used to look after a child from 18months right up untill 4yrs old who could make himself sick when he felt like it , it could be because he was upset or it could be because he didnt want to do an activitiy or somtimes he would do it at lunch because he didint want to eat anymore but because at home his parents made him eat everything on his plate he was scared to say.
there was a point in the begining when I would send him home until we worked out what he was doing and then for a while he would chuck everytime he arrived as he thought he would be taken home again, it took a while but this stopped when he realised it didnt work anymore, the other issues were harder to work on.

**jo.jo76** · 31-10-2012, 10:17 AM

Originally Posted by mushpea

how old is the child? do you think he seems well in himself and is just being sick because he's upset?
I used to look after a child from 18months right up untill 4yrs old who could make himself sick when he felt like it , it could be because he was upset or it could be because he didnt want to do an activitiy or somtimes he would do it at lunch because he didint want to eat anymore but because at home his parents made him eat everything on his plate he was scared to say.
there was a point in the begining when I would send him home until we worked out what he was doing and then for a while he would chuck everytime he arrived as he thought he would be taken home again, it took a while but this stopped when he realised it didnt work anymore, the other issues were harder to work on.

Did the one you had only do it with you or do it with mum too?

He is 12 months old. I believe it is just because he is crying and getting so upset. He has only been sick the once and seems fine in himself otherwise, although I'm scared to give him anything else to eat. He goes before he has his lunch thankfully.

I'll ask Mum if it's something he's done before.

**mushpea** · 31-10-2012, 10:24 AM

Originally Posted by jo.jo76

Did the one you had only do it with you or do it with mum too?

He is 12 months old. I believe it is just because he is crying and getting so upset. He has only been sick the once and seems fine in himself otherwise, although I'm scared to give him anything else to eat. He goes before he has his lunch thankfully.

I'll ask Mum if it's something he's done before.

he would do it at home too but they would make a big fuss of it telling him off and moaning at him where as I just used to queitly clean him and the floor up and try and ignore it then praise him for all the good stuff he did and eventually he did get over it, with the eating issue I would only put one thing on his plate then after each item he ate I would say would you like some more or do you feel full and eventually he learnt with me he could say no to more food.
I would definatly discuss with mum and if he does it at home too then ask her how she deals with it.

**jo.jo76** · 31-10-2012, 12:31 PM

Originally Posted by mushpea

he would do it at home too but they would make a big fuss of it telling him off and moaning at him where as I just used to queitly clean him and the floor up and try and ignore it then praise him for all the good stuff he did and eventually he did get over it, with the eating issue I would only put one thing on his plate then after each item he ate I would say would you like some more or do you feel full and eventually he learnt with me he could say no to more food.
I would definatly discuss with mum and if he does it at home too then ask her how she deals with it.

Thank you, Grandad picked up today so I explained what happened and that I shall be phoning Mum later.
It's not something I've experienced with a little one before, so thank you x

**Kirstylob** · 31-10-2012, 01:18 PM

Good luck. Lets hope it is a short term issue of separation. I knew of one little girl at Pre-school who would wet herself on purpose if she didn't get her own way or was told off. She grew out of it but it shows how good some children are at manipulation!

**dawn100** · 31-10-2012, 02:28 PM

My dd who is now 4 is still often sick when she gets very upset and it's not something she does on purpose as she will be hysterical but will say things like I don't want to b sick, as she knows it going to happen. It's just what her body does it doesn't mean she gets more upset than other kids it just what happens when she gets upset. If he was just crying the same amount without being sick would you be questioning if you should be still trying to settle him? I would hope that as he begins to feel safe with you that he wouldn't get as upset so therefore not make himself sick.

**jo.jo76** · 31-10-2012, 08:16 PM

Just spoken to Mum and she says he's been sick when he cried once before and her 3yr old daughter does it too, but being older she can usually talk her round before she's sick. Mum's coming round tomorrow for a drink and a play with him here with his sister, so hopefully he can feel more settled.

Thanks everyone for your support x

BucksCM · 31-10-2012, 09:48 PM

I just wanted to add that I too, have a lo who does this.
I've had her from 8m old and if i didn't pick her up straight away she'd follow me crying and work herself up and then be sick.
I know some children can make themselves sick, but there are some that if they get too worked up/stressed...they will just be sick.
It's a natural reflex that we have...you know when you have a bad accident and are sick? It's the body's way of purging...it was explained better at my 1st aid course!...but it made sense to me when I thought about the lo i have. She doesn't "make" herself sick. I'm more tolerant of this now I realise that.
She also suffers with reflux which doesn't help!

**jo.jo76** · 31-10-2012, 10:39 PM

Originally Posted by BucksCM

I just wanted to add that I too, have a lo who does this.
I've had her from 8m old and if i didn't pick her up straight away she'd follow me crying and work herself up and then be sick.
I know some children can make themselves sick, but there are some that if they get too worked up/stressed...they will just be sick.
It's a natural reflex that we have...you know when you have a bad accident and are sick? It's the body's way of purging...it was explained better at my 1st aid course!...but it made sense to me when I thought about the lo i have. She doesn't "make" herself sick. I'm more tolerant of this now I realise that.
She also suffers with reflux which doesn't help!

That's interesting, the sister of the LO I look after had exteremly bad reflux as a baby, she was awful to feed and gagged and was sick so much, so the connection does make sense. He's not had the reflux himself, but maybe there is a connection
Thank you