HELP
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Thread: HELP

  1. #1
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    I had a parent who has just given me early notice as I couldn't watch her lo 2 more hours over her time (I did have other arrangements) which I emailed her about that evening.
    She is now wishing to complain about over a number of ridiculous accusations
    1. Saying her older lo (8) ate my dogs food instead of her snack I mean that's just totally ridiculous his food was always in the garage & the ate at the kitchen table.
    2. My lo & her lo were always disagreeing but she saying my lo hit her lo
    Yeah they pushed each other I intervened and got them doing separate things
    3. They always came late and and had to rush breakfast down them in order to get to school on time
    And sometimes lo would refuse to eat anything. Mum was told this and I recorded it
    4. I never told her about getting a dog at the time of signing the contract yes I did and all parents agreed to this
    He's kept out the way when kids who a little unsure.
    5. Saying I asked for early drop off to accommodate my kids to take to clubs at 0830 when they are meant to be here at 0800 and just turning up whenever
    6. Telling my why I didn't inform her of my child that has special needs when she doesn't making me furious


    All because I couldn't take her for 2 more hours very petty indeed.

  2. #2
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    Oh what a nightmare - I fully understand your stress and obviously this is effecting your sleep.

    Firstly I would say - all these accusations are somewhat far fetched and somewhat self inflicted and in reply to each of them I would say:

    1.Any 8 year old that eats dog food - without seeming to be judgmental, discriminatory or insulting - I have to ask - do they have mental or learning difficulties?
    2. Yep 8 year old's do this, you don't, so the complaint is about the children not you. Her child and another child, sounds like 50/50 to me.
    3. Tell them to get a watch
    4. Did she not realize you had a dog when her child was eating his food? charge extra - I totally don't believe she wasn't aware but now she is and if she doesn't like it - tell her to jog on. Nothing wrong with having a dog, I have two pigs that live with me (two teenage sons).
    5. I can't see anything wrong with early drop off requests and if she doesn't want to conform she can get her trainers on and 'jog on', but it sounds like you are just asking that she sticks to agreed times so that you can plan and accommodate ALL your families/childrens needs. imo totally understandable - I hate bad timekeeping.
    6. The needs of other children in your care - no matter what they are - are non of her business. Whether she is right or wrong here doesn't come in to it.

    It sounds like this lady is spoiled and selfish, inconsiderate and totally irrational and she is hitting out because you didn't do as she asked (for what it is worth I would be quite happy to refuse additional care if it didn't work for me too), I would be telling her to stick it up her jumper with knobs on, leave a can of pedigree chum on the doorstep to p her off. And except the early notice and also be tempted to be off sick for this period or tell her the dog is sick - I probably wouldn't but some folk need teaching a lesson. I really don't think she should come to your house though if she has a problem with the dog and her kid is eating his food (I know she probably hasn't got a problem she's just trying to use it as a stick to beet you) sometimes I joke and tell MY KIDS what they are eating is dog food when they ask what it is They can see what it is - why ask!! cheer up, every box of chocolate has a nutty one in it.

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by Koala View Post


    - why every box of chocolate has a nutty one in it.
    I have not heard that one before, but I LOVE IT !!!!! I think I might get t-shirts printed with it on.

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  5. #4
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    Nice one Koala!

    For the most part you mirror my gut reaction: though we're now both in danger of incurring the wrath of the vainglorious "we're all professionals" brigade with such 'unprofessional' honesty and straight-thinking.

    After I'd calmed down (or finished laughing at mum's tirade - depending on my mood) I'd sit down and write a measured, factual, dispassionate response to each accusation. You never know when this type of moron will take such nonsense further, so no harm in being ready to prove you've responded.

    Sadly, it's this sort of thing that makes for so much additional work. We end up having to put every little detail in writing, eg. so you can prove you told mum you were getting a dog. Why can't telling them ever be enough? I recall chatting with a nursery manager once who had a mum claiming her little darling had an allergic reaction to the washing powder/liquid used to wash the nursery tea towels/aprons/dressing-up/whatever. Mum even submitted a written demand to see the past year's receipts to prove what brand they'd used. SO petty.

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  7. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by bunyip View Post
    Nice one Koala!

    For the most part you mirror my gut reaction: though we're now both in danger of incurring the wrath of the vainglorious "we're all professionals" brigade with such 'unprofessional' honesty and straight-thinking.

    After I'd calmed down (or finished laughing at mum's tirade - depending on my mood) I'd sit down and write a measured, factual, dispassionate response to each accusation. You never know when this type of moron will take such nonsense further, so no harm in being ready to prove you've responded.

    Sadly, it's this sort of thing that makes for so much additional work. We end up having to put every little detail in writing, eg. so you can prove you told mum you were getting a dog. Why can't telling them ever be enough? I recall chatting with a nursery manager once who had a mum claiming her little darling had an allergic reaction to the washing powder/liquid used to wash the nursery tea towels/aprons/dressing-up/whatever. Mum even submitted a written demand to see the past year's receipts to prove what brand they'd used. SO petty.
    Does it show what brand you bought on most receipts?

  8. #6
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    I agree with the others.

    Deep Breath, Pour a glass of cold wine tonight and sit down and carefully go through each accusation and answer it in a very factual non emotional way, even the dreadful one about your daughter.

    Do this and send it to her by Recorded Delivery or make her sign your copy to confirm the date she has received hers. Then when she does, if she does complain to Ofsted she will look like a numpty. I would also acknowledge her giving notice and give the date and day of the last day of care and any monies due up to the end of the notice period. (Oh and remind her that it is her responsibility to tell Tax Credits that she is no longer using you and her changes).

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  10. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by rickysmiths View Post
    Does it show what brand you bought on most receipts?
    Who knows?

    It's all a bit primitive here in the village. We take all the washing down to the river and bang it against the rocks.

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  12. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by rickysmiths View Post
    I agree with the others.

    Deep Breath, Pour a glass of cold wine tonight and sit down and carefully go through each accusation and answer it in a very factual non emotional way, even the dreadful one about your daughter.

    Do this and send it to her by Recorded Delivery or make her sign your copy to confirm the date she has received hers. Then when she does, if she does complain to Ofsted she will look like a numpty. I would also acknowledge her giving notice and give the date and day of the last day of care and any monies due up to the end of the notice period. (Oh and remind her that it is her responsibility to tell Tax Credits that she is no longer using you and her changes).
    Absolutely. Plus one thing I forgot to mention previously. Make a note on your response that these issues were not raised at the times they occurred, but came as one big list immediately following a disagreement over her request to vary the contract. Ofsted must be very used to this sort of thing and probably recognise a contract dispute and the ensuing parental spite when they see it.

    Keep copies.

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