my first potential visit last min help!

[crumpet54]

It could be that the nursery doesn't take under 1s or has no vacancies at the moment, so she's looking for a stop gap until a space becomes available.

Could be but doubt it's fully booked it's dire the one she said he goes to

[crumpet54]

Also wanting 10-3 takes up a full day space doesn't it. Plus didn't want me going out in the morning while the baby sleeps only in cot not in car or pram. Wouldn't leave me with much time to get out cos once lunch etc been done then I'd have to be back for 3 for collection.
Just seems a lot of aggro

[lollipop kid]

Also wanting 10-3 takes up a full day space doesn't it. Plus didn't want me going out in the morning while the baby sleeps only in cot not in car or pram. Wouldn't leave me with much time to get out cos once lunch etc been done then I'd have to be back for 3 for collection.
Just seems a lot of aggro

No doubt she only wanted to pay for the 5 hours from 10-3 as well (rather than a full day). I'd like to see her getting the same deal at a Nursery - thus going across both their morning and afternoon sessions.



LK

[crumpet54]

No doubt she only wanted to pay for the 5 hours from 10-3 as well (rather than a full day). I'd like to see her getting the same deal at a Nursery - thus going across both their morning and afternoon sessions.



LK

Yes definitely that's prob why she's not gone to the nursery. Good point

[greenfaerie]

Yikes! Sounds like you may be dodging a bullet there. Nightmare. Making me feel really lucky to have gotten the parents that I got, I'm not good at being dictated to! :S

Run fast! And I'm loving the eloquent refusal examples that others have posted, very professional and friendly sounding. More so than my terrified shrieking and hanging up on her would be.

[Maza]

One of the best pieces of advice I was given was not to take on anyone who tried to barter with you over fees. I have stuck to that advice and never regretted it. If she is a solicitor she is hardly strapped for cash. As for her letting you know she was a solicitor, so flipping what? There are thousands of them in the country, so she's not that special. The nice ones, or the ones without a chip on their shoulder wouldn't have needed to tell you that.

I made a big mistake of taking on a child who could only sleep in a darkened room, and like you he needed to sleep slap bang in the middle of my morning. It was so restricting and depressing. I would never, ever agree to it again. I prefer children to be able to sleep in a travel cot but it would have been nice to occasionally to have let him sleep in a buggy while we were out.

Another one I turned down was someone who also made a funny face every time my daughter got a bit energetic - my DD is generally chilled and gentle, so I would love to know what she ended up with. I emailed her after her second visit and wrote something along the lines of 'I sensed some anxiety regarding my DD, and whilst 'x' needs to be safe, my DD needs to be allowed the freedom to explore and be a typical 2 year old, and so I don't think the two would be compatible, therefore I would not feel comfortable offering x a place'. I would have loved to have seen her face when she read the email. She and her husband had grilled me so much and never for one moment considered that it was a two way interview.

I don't like the sound of the mum you saw at all. I would turn her down, you deserve better. x

[crumpet54]

One of the best pieces of advice I was given was not to take on anyone who tried to barter with you over fees. I have stuck to that advice and never regretted it. If she is a solicitor she is hardly strapped for cash. As for her letting you know she was a solicitor, so flipping what? There are thousands of them in the country, so she's not that special. The nice ones, or the ones without a chip on their shoulder wouldn't have needed to tell you that.

I made a big mistake of taking on a child who could only sleep in a darkened room, and like you he needed to sleep slap bang in the middle of my morning. It was so restricting and depressing. I would never, ever agree to it again. I prefer children to be able to sleep in a travel cot but it would have been nice to occasionally to have let him sleep in a buggy while we were out.

Another one I turned down was someone who also made a funny face every time my daughter got a bit energetic - my DD is generally chilled and gentle, so I would love to know what she ended up with. I emailed her after her second visit and wrote something along the lines of 'I sensed some anxiety regarding my DD, and whilst 'x' needs to be safe, my DD needs to be allowed the freedom to explore and be a typical 2 year old, and so I don't think the two would be compatible, therefore I would not feel comfortable offering x a place'. I would have loved to have seen her face when she read the email. She and her husband had grilled me so much and never for one moment considered that it was a two way interview.

I don't like the sound of the mum you saw at all. I would turn her down, you deserve better. x

Thanks maza, yes there's no way I'm going to take her on. It's really not worth it.
Like you say it's a 2 way thing and has to be beneficial to me and my daughter as well.
Ps loved that email yes oh to be a fly on the wall ay!

[BallyH]

Crumpet54 you are learning fast. Good choice not to choose them. I felt she was being threatening telling you she was a solicitor as if to say 'anything happens .... I'll have you!' Really good advice in the other posts for your decline email. Best of luck.

[Kiddleywinks]

I agree you're learning fast

It is hard, especially when you need to be bringing the money in, not to agree to all and every demands potential parents make, just to secure the work, but.....

It is a two-way situation - parents need to fit in with you as much as you need to fit in with them
Anything that starts to deviate from how you intend to run your business and starts raising the hairs on the back of your neck, or starts you making a 'what?!' face (internally of course lol) is to be taken as a warning that this is probably not the one for you.

I'm sure most of us at some point would have sold our souls to the devil to get our first clients when we started out (....No? Just me then ) but on reflection, 6 or 10 months later, also realised that waiting for the right 'fit' ensures a more comfortable and secure working life.
My first few enquiries would have created major problems for me had we signed contracts, so I'm glad now it came to nothing, even though we were skint for months.
Stay strong. The right contract for you will come

[crumpet54]

I agree you're learning fast

It is hard, especially when you need to be bringing the money in, not to agree to all and every demands potential parents make, just to secure the work, but.....

It is a two-way situation - parents need to fit in with you as much as you need to fit in with them
Anything that starts to deviate from how you intend to run your business and starts raising the hairs on the back of your neck, or starts you making a 'what?!' face (internally of course lol) is to be taken as a warning that this is probably not the one for you.

I'm sure most of us at some point would have sold our souls to the devil to get our first clients when we started out (....No? Just me then ) but on reflection, 6 or 10 months later, also realised that waiting for the right 'fit' ensures a more comfortable and secure working life.
My first few enquiries would have created major problems for me had we signed contracts, so I'm glad now it came to nothing, even though we were skint for months.
Stay strong. The right contract for you will come

I'm only learning fast because of you lovelies on here! Months and months of coming on this forum is the best training preparation I could have lol lol

My partner and I were chatting about it and we've managed for 18 months on just his wage so we can wait until a better family come along. Although my own wage would be nice thus side of Xmas! Lol

[crumpet54]

You'll all be pleased to know I contacted her and said that I was unable to meet their needs etc etc (all what had been advised on here thank you ) and she said ok thanks for letting me know

And rellllllaaaaaaxxxxx lol
What a relief x

[Mouse]

You'll all be pleased to know I contacted her and said that I was unable to meet their needs etc etc (all what had been advised on here thank you ) and she said ok thanks for letting me know

And rellllllaaaaaaxxxxx lol
What a relief x

Well done!

It's good to know this board can help new childminders and hopefully give them the confidence to take a moment to think about what is best for them. I've seen so many new minders take on the first family that comes along, agreeing to all sorts of ridiculous conditions or reducing fees, then regretting it after a short while.

You've done very well to get enquiries so soon, so you're obviously doing something right. Keep going and the perfect family will come along soon

[crumpet54]

Well done!

It's good to know this board can help new childminders and hopefully give them the confidence to take a moment to think about what is best for them. I've seen so many new minders take on the first family that comes along, agreeing to all sorts of ridiculous conditions or reducing fees, then regretting it after a short while.

You've done very well to get enquiries so soon, so you're obviously doing something right. Keep going and the perfect family will come along soon

Thanks mouse x xx