mindee that never wants to leave, please help

[samkeddy]

Hiya,
Again in need of advice
I have posted about this mindee before, i have cared for her for 2 years since she had just turned 2, mon-fri, 7.30-4.30
For those that remember, she is a madam, very grumpy and likes to have her own way, everyone reminded me what i allready knew, she craves attention due to 'bad parenting' lack of attention at home!!!

So that was then, i was just going through a bad patch now were back to nomal.

This child has always enjoyed coming and has occasionally not wanted to go home but over the last few months this has increased ALOT, if i mention her leaving she gets really upset, we have genuine tears everyday just at the thought of going home, she tells me all the time that she loves me and will miss me, she draws me pictures at nursery and at home everyday (and none for mum) and when mum comes to pick her up she's telling her she doesnt want to go home, she cries, sulks and yesterday told her mum she didnt like her this mum is not the most loving/ maternal whatever but i can see its starting to bother her.

I really dont know how to deal with this????
Please help, i want mindee to enjoy been with me but if i was her mum this would be breaking my heart!!
I dont know what to do, im scared mum might just take her away to someone else if it carrys on jus cos it annoys her!

Please help

[Polly2]

Thats a tough one...how about a topic on family. Not sure how old lo is but she could make a book about her family, photos etc, you could read books about families - 'hug' is a good one - where the little monkey is looking for his mummy.

You could make a big deal of mothers day - lo could make some lovely gifts for mum. Talk about how important mummys are etc.

[The Juggler]

i find in these situations with kids who go crazy or don't want to leave that preparing them helps. so talk to them during the day about being nice to mummy at pick up, how we are going to help mummy when she comes as she's had a long day and will want to have fun with you..... etc, etc.

then, just before she is due to arrive (ask mum to text 10 mins away if possible) say mummy is on her way, lets tidy up (or whatever suits) and then, we'll get your things together. Ask "what are you going to do when mummy gets here? give her a huge hug/tell her about your day" It might take a few goes but it does really make a difference.

[samkeddy]

Shes 4, and there's some good ideas there thanks, ive already got lots planned for mothers day and will put lots of enphasis on her mummy

Although at a rhyme group i go to at school with her and my dd they were talking about mothers day this morning, we sang a song in preperation for mothers day assembly next week

'i love mum,
she loves me,
i love all my family
my mum and me and my family is who i love YEA'

and she kept hugging me, telling me 'sam you the best mum in the world' (my dd hardly looking at me at all lol)

i reminded her im not her mum, but she just laughed.

Sorry im rabbiting on lol

[samkeddy]

i find in these situations with kids who go crazy or don't want to leave that preparing them helps. so talk to them during the day about being nice to mummy at pick up, how we are going to help mummy when she comes as she's had a long day and will want to have fun with you..... etc, etc.

then, just before she is due to arrive (ask mum to text 10 mins away if possible) say mummy is on her way, lets tidy up (or whatever suits) and then, we'll get your things together. Ask "what are you going to do when mummy gets here? give her a huge hug/tell her about your day" It might take a few goes but it does really make a difference.

sounds like good ideas thank you x