Concerned about DS - OCD / ASD ???

**buzzy bee** · 06-03-2012, 04:11 PM

This is about my DS. He is just 2 and has always had a transporting schema, since he was tiny he liked to carry things from one room to another etc. He has also always lined up his cars and other toys.

I'm becoming increasingly concerned about him because he gets VERY upset when things don't happen how he'd expect them to. E.g. if he's lining up the cars on the sofa and they roll down the slopes, he gets really upset - screams and cries and throws them all on the floor. Same when he's doing a puzzle and the pieces don't fit, or when he's trying to put something in a basket / box / bag and they don't fit he gets really frustrated. When I say frustrated I mean screaming meltdowns.

He also tried to fill up containers so full that they won't do up or he can't carry them and this upsets him too.

He gets so upset he makes ME want to cry!!

I don't really know what to do anymore. I just try to keep my voice really calm, tell him to calm down and stop crying and say "please mummy help me" (which he usually does) and then I help him and explain what happened - e.g. "It was too big so it didn't fit".

It just doesn't seem to be getting any better and if anything it's getting worse.

Should I be concerned about this behaviour or is it quite normal??

**catminder** · 06-03-2012, 04:17 PM

I would suggest the best person to ask would be your health visitor, who would then be able to advise if you should be concerned about this.

**buzzy bee** · 06-03-2012, 04:24 PM

Originally Posted by catminder

I would suggest the best person to ask would be your health visitor, who would then be able to advise if you should be concerned about this.

Thanks... I did mention it at his 2 year check and she said she'd call me in a few months to see how I felt it was going... I just don't want it to go on his medical records in case it causes him problems with anything he wants to do later in life

**sarah707** · 06-03-2012, 06:07 PM

A lot of boys are like that about their games whether it's lining things up or throwing things or having a tizzy if something doesn't work exactly as they want it or they can't get their shoe on... I have known a few in my time.

They have very strong emotions around this time and are unable to control them. Plus if their speech is not well developed they have no other way of letting you know how they feel.

However if you are worried you should always ask your HV for advice xx

**clio0602** · 06-03-2012, 08:08 PM

Hi I would get in touch with health visitor as soon as you feel you can. I'm not saying it is ASD but I wish I had taken my ds at an earlier age as he was 10 when he got diagnosed with ASD and I feel I let him struggle all those years at school when I should have done something earlier on.

It is likely it is nothing to worry yourself about but it won't harm to get medical advice.

Hope it goes ok x

**primula** · 06-03-2012, 10:05 PM

Just wanted to say that I had a little boy who did exactly the same things! He used to try and put a little superman in things that it wouldnt fit. I would offer him replacement but no he would continue to 'try' and get so upset, even sobbing?! He would do this over and over again, like he couldnt stop himself.. He would also carry armfulls of stuff and get so frustrated because he couldnt pick up anything else. He was 2 1/2 almost 3yrs at the time. He grew out of it and is a bright and clever 7yr old now. He always seemed to me to be trying to make sense of things? Doesnt always mean there is something a miss...

**EmmaReed84** · 07-03-2012, 06:38 AM

If you are concerned then contact HV and keep a diary what behaviour was displayed, what he was doing and how he was calmed down. Does he get frustrated during play or in everyday life? How does he handle change to routine?

DS(6) has now been referred to paediatric physcologist because school have concerns. He was my first child and I had never really heard of ASD but used to notice from a baby he would only have one type of teat on his bottle and would not under any circumstances take anything different. He would only have latex cheery teat dumnmies and again nothing else. He would scream and cry if you even tried to give him any different. He had to close doors and would really get upset if we told him to leave them. The urge was always too much and he would HAVE to close it... This was not him being difficult because if we said no to other things he would always listen.

There were loads of other things as well. Like I said I had never heard of ASD before so just thought he was a bit eccentric, it wasn't until the school raised concerned that I have really looked in to it.

Even now if I change things he has meltdowns... I bought toothpaste, same make as before but it had slightly different packaging and he went in to one.

One the flip side, DS (3) does exactly as you describe and is such a clean freak, but he is not fazed by changes in routine at all.

**blue bear** · 07-03-2012, 07:06 AM

As you are achildminder could you not get advice from a senco through your D/O?

**buzzy bee** · 07-03-2012, 08:14 AM

Originally Posted by primula

Just wanted to say that I had a little boy who did exactly the same things! He used to try and put a little superman in things that it wouldnt fit. I would offer him replacement but no he would continue to 'try' and get so upset, even sobbing?! He would do this over and over again, like he couldnt stop himself.. He would also carry armfulls of stuff and get so frustrated because he couldnt pick up anything else. He was 2 1/2 almost 3yrs at the time. He grew out of it and is a bright and clever 7yr old now. He always seemed to me to be trying to make sense of things? Doesnt always mean there is something a miss...

I forgot to mention about the carrying thing but he does this exact same thing... He always has little "collections" of things - like if he has one particular soft toy then he has to have 2 other specific ones aswell. And then as you say with your little boy, he gets very upset if he can't carry them all or can't pick anything up.

Same if we're out and he's collecting sticks - he gets really frustrated if he can't carry any more, even when he's got armfuls of sticks. The other day I got so fed up of him screaming every time he tried to pick up another one that I just took them all away from him and made him leave them all behind.

Probably not the best thing to do but I was at the end of my tether!!

**buzzy bee** · 07-03-2012, 08:17 AM

Originally Posted by EmmaReed84

If you are concerned then contact HV and keep a diary what behaviour was displayed, what he was doing and how he was calmed down. Does he get frustrated during play or in everyday life? How does he handle change to routine?

DS(6) has now been referred to paediatric physcologist because school have concerns. He was my first child and I had never really heard of ASD but used to notice from a baby he would only have one type of teat on his bottle and would not under any circumstances take anything different. He would only have latex cheery teat dumnmies and again nothing else. He would scream and cry if you even tried to give him any different. He had to close doors and would really get upset if we told him to leave them. The urge was always too much and he would HAVE to close it... This was not him being difficult because if we said no to other things he would always listen.

There were loads of other things as well. Like I said I had never heard of ASD before so just thought he was a bit eccentric, it wasn't until the school raised concerned that I have really looked in to it.

Even now if I change things he has meltdowns... I bought toothpaste, same make as before but it had slightly different packaging and he went in to one.

One the flip side, DS (3) does exactly as you describe and is such a clean freak, but he is not fazed by changes in routine at all.

I don't think he gets affected by change... He does have to have certain things in groups like I mentioned - like he has books we keep upstairs for bedtime and he likes to carry them all around in a pile upstairs - but he has to have ALL of them.

And with his magnetic trains, he has decided that one of the trains goes with 2 of the carriages (they didn't come in a set, he's just done that himself) and if he can't find one of the carriages he gets upset, and if I ever put a different carriage on the train he tells me off and takes it off!!

Funnily enough he does like to close doors, but he doesn't "have to" I don't think...