This job is so hard sometimes

[JCrakers]

Afternoon,

I look after a little boy who is 5yrs but only have him in sch hols so don't see a lot of him. The past 2 hols have been quiet but this one has been hectic.
When I first met him and observed his play I found it a little different from the norm. (whatever the norm is..lol)
This week I have more concerns as he has played alone all day. He tends to go into himself and play with the same toy, spinning his hands round and round. The others asked him to join in with their games but he didn't know how to.

He likes his shoes 'just so' and spends time undoing them to make them perfect. He only likes 1 type of play which is based around a film that he seems obsessed with. he will only eat the same sandwich,
He didnt seem to have any social interaction with the others at all today at one point he was stood behind a post at the park as the others had asked him if he wanted to join in.
Not sure what to say to mum. I don't want to say anything to her but feel I have to.

[sarah707]

Is he unhappy do you think? Or does he just prefer to be on his own?

We all want to be alone sometimes and that isn't a worry in itself.

However if he is deliberately removing himself from other children I think you need to ask how he is at home / school.

Hth

[blue bear]

Have you asked him? He might be able to tell you how he feels about the other children.

[NicoleW]

Does sound like some tendancies of autistic children, or perhaps slight OCD?

I'd sit and chat to LO unformally ofc, asking him how he is feeling and just in general ask mum at pickup "how is he getting on at school? Is he enjoying it?" She might then bring up "Yeah but lately he's been doing xxxxx"

[miffy]

Have you asked him? He might be able to tell you how he feels about the other children.

I would do this too and then also to his mum.

Miffy xx

[JCrakers]

Thanks for your replies.
I've started to make some notes about him.

Today he has played a little with another boy but no conversation at his end. Also he has found a propeller from the sticklebricks set and has had it for the past 30mins spinning round very close to his face making a whirring noise. Ive left him and just watched for a while.
The other 3 children came and sat next to him but he gathered the couple of things he had and has gone to sit it the playhouse on his own and continued with the spinning.
Also today he was quite angry and screwed his fists to the 2yr old mindee and also pinched her.

Anyone done any training for Autism/Asbergers? Do these sound like the sort of thing you would associate.

[blue bear]

Yes it could but be very careful about labelling we are not qualified to diagnose a child that's down to the professionals, best to just deal with what you are seeing ifswim.
Talk to this little chap about his feelings, he might need somewhere that is safe to be on his own (knows other children won't go in or approach him) pop up tent, cardboard box, net tent(over bed canaopy thing), behind the sofa. That allows him his own space to play or be when being with other people get too much.
Has mum said how he is getting on at school? does he have friends round at home. Think id be saying he seems happy and settled but is happier playing on his own mostly is he like that at home or school?
Do you have routine or mostly spontaneous, does he cope better with routine or goes with the flow easy enough?

[jadavi]

I've worked with autistic children as a special needs teacher for some years and sadly these behaviours you describe really do fit the autistic picture incl the aggression. It's really important to get a diagnosis as early as possible to help the child and I think the route would be the health visitor. As people have suggested the mum is the one who should be made aware . I'd be amazed if she hasn't noticed and doesn't suspect something but may need a gentle nudge. Not an enviable task for you but it is our duty to the child to report these concerns.