Cursing 4 year old - help me decide what to say to mum!!

[juslh]

Ok, being a bit of a wimp here - I need to have a word when mum comes to collect her 4 year old this evening and not sure quite what to say/how to say it.

Last week I thought I heard mindee say 'You to my child. I said 'What did you say?' but he just grinned at me nervously. I assumed I had misheard him. Today he said clear as day so I now think I heard him right last week too. I spoke sharply to him then said 'Where did you learn that word? Its a nasty grown up word.' He said mum. His 2 year old brother then piped up 'Mummy gets cross.' (Children do like to dump their parents in it dont they? )

How do I tell her diplomatically to watch her tongue??!

[Pipsqueak]

I think you might just say 'oh i had to tell X about their rather colourful language this morning' just thought I'd tell you..... and you might just want to add in, I thought I heard X say something colourfully similar last week. Can I just run it by you that this is how I am going to deal with it.

That way you have raised the issue and kept parent informed.
They are aware and you have told them how you intend to deal with it in the future (so get your thinking cap on)

and then if it continues, escalates etc then you can tackle it further without it being a surprise to parent

[sarah707]

The parents need to work with you - the child has to have heard it somewhere

Good luck

[ziggy]

Personally i dont think childminders have the right to tell parents what they can or cannot say away from the minders house. I'm not saying i agree with swearing in front of children and i hate to think a child is called names but..........


If any of my parents/mindees use a word i dont like, even saying 'shut up' I just say 'we dont use those words in this house'

Works for me

[JCrakers]

Personally i dont think childminders have the right to tell parents what they can or cannot say away from the minders house. I'm not saying i agree with swearing in front of children and i hate to think a child is called names but..........


If any of my parents/mindees use a word i dont like, even saying 'shut up' I just say 'we dont use those words in this house'

Works for me

I'd agree..this is what I say on a regular basis
Two brothers arrive this morning, one is having a bit of a strop because Mum wouldnt let him bring some toys as he had left it too late. He was having a major sulk and when she had gone it carried on. He said a few things to the other children, a few names called and 'shut up' so I just reminded him that we dont have that behaviour here and he soon perked up.
Id probably mention it to Mum that youve had a word with him and then just remind him that the behaviour is not tolerated at your house. You cant stop Mum swearing at home but can remind the child that you will not listen to it at yours

[rosebud]

I would say to the child "We don't use those words here" everytime they say it, wouldn't make to big a thing of it but also wouldn't ignore it.
I would say to mum "I had to speak to X about his language this morning, he said and I have told him that its not acceptable." It might make her think twice about what she says at home if she knows he's picking it up.

[Tippy Toes]

I would just mention it casually to her - even just mentioning to her that little one has said X should make her more aware of what she is saying in front of her little one.

xx