yr 6 attitude

[spowage]

hi had a bad evenin g with my son going to be 11 in july omg such major attitude nothing we do is ever right he gets abussive wants to leave and all the rest of it ,im getting sick of this when will he ever snap out of this? how do you all cope with kids this age? im finding it really hard being a mummy at the moment.

[SYLVIA]

Grin and bear it. Yr 6's are top of everything so they think. But just wait till september when they are at the bottom again!

[spowage]

we keep telling him this ,god knows how hes gonna manage yr 7!!!! im so scared for him....but i know he needs to grow up but it damn hard work!

[Mouse]

Grin and bear it. Yr 6's are top of everything so they think. But just wait till september when they are at the bottom again!

That is so true! Some of them just outgrow junior school when they're in year six and think they rule the world. Then they land in year 7 with a real bump!

On the plus side, they soon find their feet and are back to knowing everything again! I have 4 boys all gone through that stage and we've all survived...just

[spowage]

thanks i will wake up tomoz with a smile and think september!!xx

[sarah32]

hi had a bad evenin g with my son going to be 11 in july omg such major attitude nothing we do is ever right he gets abussive wants to leave and all the rest of it ,im getting sick of this when will he ever snap out of this? how do you all cope with kids this age? im finding it really hard being a mummy at the moment.

Totally understand, my daughter is 11 in August and the sighs and back chat is all the time at the moment.

I try to ignore as best as possible and send her to her room when she gets to much

She is very scared of secondary school at the moment and I think its really stessful for them going to a new school so I just think of that whens she giving me attitude.

[RachelE]

I am having a tough time with my ds at the moment.
He's very bright, 9yr, yr4.
We had a friend babysit on Friday and he was really rude. She's a Nanny and really laid it on thick about how bad he's been and I ended up crying myself to sleep.
We punished him - one of which was cancelling his tea date wit a fiend on Monday, being postponed for tomorrow - which I've had to postpone again.

Anway, her Mum is the only one that has given any helpful advice!

She had this with her child and likened it to that of taming a toddler! If a toddler has a tantrum, you ignore or try and change the behaviour. And the more I thought about it the more she was right! Matthew was testing the boundaries and today we seem to have had a breakthrough!

I hope that you soon see light at the end of the tunnel.

Good luck,
Rachel x

[sarah707]

My best tip being in the middle of surviving 2 teenagers is to pick your battles.

Before you ask anything of him just stop a moment and think about whether it's really important or not.

If it can go over your head without too much damage - picking up clothes, changing bedding, tidying room, helping wash up - just for now put it on hold.

Instead focus on the important stuff - not smoking, not drinking, not doing really stupid things.

As for the strops - ignore them like you would a toddler! He is just shouting for attention. Give him time when he is being nice.

If he's mithering for things 'everyone' has say no if you can't afford them and keep saying no. Don't let him get away with it or wear you down. You have to be in control for a few more years.

Good luck!

[miffy]

My best tip being in the middle of surviving 2 teenagers is to pick your battles.

Totally agree (although sometimes much easier said than done ).

And hang onto the fact that eventually they'll come through it all and you'll enjoy their company again!

Miffy xx

[bexcee]

I am mum to a year 6 child too! My daughter is 10, 11 in August and the teenage strops are starting early!!

We have the three tier school system here so she change schools at the end of year 4 and will change again after year 8. She had to grow up too fast when she started middle school and they were suddenly given all this responsibility and so much was expected of them and she couldn't handle it and took her frustrations out on us at home

She is now more settled at school but still has the strops here nothing is fair everyone else is allowed to stay up later, go out longer, gets more pocket money etc etc etc

Like Sarah we have decided what is important and what we can let lie for now. Respecting her elders is one thing we insist on, what an adult says goes whether it is us, other family members or teachers, she doesn't answer back or question them. We don't tolerate swearing or bad language. She has to set a good example to her younger brothers and to always tell the truth.

Things like tidying her bedroom aren't that important in the grand scheme of things and as long as she confines her mess to her room then I can ignore it!

If her behaviour is unacceptable she has sanctions such as not being allowed to stay up later at the weekend, no pocket money, no ds etc.

Good luck, and remember you are the adult don't drop to their level and end up in petty arguments with them

[TheBTeam]

Yep it isnt easy, my son is now in year 7 and so far not a lot better on the home front.

dd in yr 4 is not far behind either, but i guess she is copying, so here's hoping that when he comes out the other side, she will copy that too.

For incredibly bright academic and sporting children, they can be very stupid at time!!!!!!!!

[charlie potato]

we keep telling him this ,god knows how hes gonna manage yr 7!!!! im so scared for him....but i know he needs to grow up but it damn hard work!

We are worried about the same thing with our 10 yr old. It must be a phase they all go through. xx

[spowage]

thankyou all so much for the advice....i will pick my battles....(need to speak to hubby too..as he escalates many) i will from now on look at him as a toddler and see if that helps thanks agian all of you ...everyone on here is fab and really helpful xxxx

[nokidshere]

My best tip being in the middle of surviving 2 teenagers is to pick your battles.

Before you ask anything of him just stop a moment and think about whether it's really important or not.

If it can go over your head without too much damage - picking up clothes, changing bedding, tidying room, helping wash up - just for now put it on hold.

Instead focus on the important stuff - not smoking, not drinking, not doing really stupid things.

As for the strops - ignore them like you would a toddler! He is just shouting for attention. Give him time when he is being nice.

If he's mithering for things 'everyone' has say no if you can't afford them and keep saying no. Don't let him get away with it or wear you down. You have to be in control for a few more years.

Good luck!

Great Advice - and exactly how we deal with our yr7 boy

[Bridey]

Great advice from Sarah. I was once whinging at my 13 year old when he suddenly turned round to me and said "Mum, what is the problem? I don't smoke, drink, or take drugs, I do my homework on time and always come home when you tell me to. Ok, I've left my socks on the floor ... SO WHAT??!!"

I do remember he was really awful in Yr 6. Lots of mood swings, bin kicking in the classroom and I can't even tell you what he yelled at his teacher one day. This was from a boy who is likeable, polite and popular. I put it down to stress from SATS, hormones and starting secondary school.

Your son is starting to change into a man and you will mourn the loss of your 'baby' but he's still the same lovely person deep down inside

[spowage]

those hormones are a pain i tell you!!! he is doing SATS mocks at the moment ,maybe it is just that, . well he breaks up on fri and hopefully he can relax a little and be my likeable boy..and i dont want him to turn into a man ..yikes!

[Bridey]

those hormones are a pain i tell you!!! he is doing SATS mocks at the moment ,maybe it is just that, . well he breaks up on fri and hopefully he can relax a little and be my likeable boy..and i dont want him to turn into a man ..yikes!

That will be it ... blinking SATS. The pressure they are under are unbelieveable. My son started bed wetting through the build-up to his. In the end I spoke to his teacher and she introduced some relaxation techniques into their daily routine.

I know what you mean about not wanting this. I had a little weep the other day looking at my son's baby pics (Its just been me and him for the last 12 years) My mum says I'll get him back ... in about another 6 years time!

[spowage]

OMG! another 8 yrs of this . no seriously i will try and help him snap out of it and maybe speak to his teacher infact im at school this p.m as its open house where we can sift through their hard work so maybe i will have a quiet word!

[Bridey]

OMG! another 8 yrs of this . no seriously i will try and help him snap out of it and maybe speak to his teacher infact im at school this p.m as its open house where we can sift through their hard work so maybe i will have a quiet word!

No, I've got another 8 years. As your son is two years younger than mine ... you have 10!

ps: A good book to read is 'Talking To Tweenies'

[manjay]

My eldest DD is 18 and she has very definitely come through the other side and turned into a lovely considerate, hard working young lady. Believe me there have been many times over the last 8 years that I didn't think this would happen. My 2nd DD is 11 and in year 7 and she is totally different. I do however put some of that down to the way I deal with her and definitely picking my battles.

Hey I have reflected on my parenting, recognised it was a bit rubbish the first time and I have learnt from my mistakes. The powers that be would be very proud