what do you think of nurseries?

[devoncm]

Not really sure where to put this but wondered what people thought.
My children never went to day care nurseries until 3yrs and entwined with school.
My step son goes every day 8.30-6pm, he's 3 (10 months youger than my daughter who talks for england and more) cant talk very well but getting better, he gets one to one because of this, until recently he was always naughty when there and plays his mum something awful, when we have him he is like a normal child naughty but not horrible and is good at nursery, yesturday though he took a hampster out the cage and threw it across the room of the nursery, he used to be distructive and bite pinch and one day because a little boy didnt let him have the toy he wanted my step son pinned him on the floor and bit his todger through the jeans and ripped at the foreskin, the nursery are putting it down to him not being able to talk properly but now he's been trying harder he is quite understandable- sorry but where do you draw the line? especially when he is meant to have one on one help?
To top it off his mum has had enough and has said that she wants to put him in rest bite sometimes- we have him every four days (to my oh shift pattern) for 3 days so doing this when the hell does she think she is going to see him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sorry moan over-i just dont think the nursery or the mother is being very helpful to him

[Alibali]

I personally prefer a home environment for young children with a smaller ratio, but I know others who would never leave their child with a minder because there is only one adult present, We are all so different, yet just the same

Ali

[Trouble]

i had a little boy come to my house who went to nursery and he came with a reputation but he was lovely his mum wrote a lovely comment in my book and said how much hes chatting since he came here

[chubbymummy]

he sounds very frustated and in need of help

i do hope you manage to sort out this situation with his mum.

[flora]

My dd can bite,push and kick and I think she does it through fustration. Her speech is quite good for her age, she can make her needs/ wants quite clear. She just can't cope when the world does not fall in with her expectation.

We are putting clear boundaries in and things have improved, not 100 % perfect all the time, but she's learning. Not 2 till next week, so still a bit young, but she's catching on quick.

Sounds like the little chap could do with some of the same.

[devoncm]

I know, when he is with us he is really good plays nice eats his tea. if any of my children are naughty they get the naughty chair or stand in corner facing the wall we stand firm on our disapline and it does not budge, if they leave tea they dont get dessert, then he will take his plate back to table and eat it all. he is non stop from 3 when we get him from nursery til 7 when he goes bed and sleeps through til we get up, where as it takes his mum 3 hrs to get him sleep and he constantly wakes up in the night. she doesnt stick to anything if he cries and moans she gives in straight away for the quiet life, its so frustrating cos we get moaned at and what can we do but have him more but she wont have that either cos shell lose csa money!!!! she is very money orientated and wouldnt surprise me if she only had him for the money, she has also admitted that she will not give up work as she can not cope with him on her own.

[buildingblocks]

I know, when he is with us he is really good plays nice eats his tea. if any of my children are naughty they get the naughty chair or stand in corner facing the wall we stand firm on our disapline and it does not budge, if they leave tea they dont get dessert, then he will take his plate back to table and eat it all. he is non stop from 3 when we get him from nursery til 7 when he goes bed and sleeps through til we get up, where as it takes his mum 3 hrs to get him sleep and he constantly wakes up in the night. she doesnt stick to anything if he cries and moans she gives in straight away for the quiet life, its so frustrating cos we get moaned at and what can we do but have him more but she wont have that either cos shell lose csa money!!!! she is very money orientated and wouldnt surprise me if she only had him for the money, she has also admitted that she will not give up work as she can not cope with him on her own.

It sounds to me that if you are having no problem with him that the 'problem' is the care at home and no boundaries

[Gherkin]

It sounds to me that if you are having no problem with him that the 'problem' is the care at home and no boundaries

I agree wholeheartedly. Some children need more boundaries than others and he sounds like he needs firm boundaries which in turn help him settle as he knows exactly where he stands.

[Cammie Doodle]

Poor kid, all these different places and different rules his head must be a shed, he needs everyone singing from the same hym sheet. On the other hand poor you , you are doing things right and Mum un-does all that when he returns to her . Can you (or his Dad) speak to the supervisor at Nursery and work closely with them ? At least this way 2 out of the 3 will be doing the same thing and this may help him understand the "boundaries" a bit better.
Good Luck (its so hard bringing other peoples children up when they are still very much on the scene, been there done that and got the Tshirt)
Thinking of you
June
ps in answer to the Q, Nurseries in my opinion are good for the older child 3 +, but I dont think it is the place for babies, but we are all different and we all have a choice to make, but personally I never put any of mine in any younger that 3

[Rubybubbles]

Poor kid, all these different places and different rules his head must be a shed, he needs everyone singing from the same hym sheet. On the other hand poor you , you are doing things right and Mum un-does all that when he returns to her . Can you (or his Dad) speak to the supervisor at Nursery and work closely with them ? At least this way 2 out of the 3 will be doing the same thing and this may help him understand the "boundaries" a bit better.
Good Luck (its so hard bringing other peoples children up when they are still very much on the scene, been there done that and got the Tshirt)
Thinking of you
June
ps in answer to the Q, Nurseries in my opinion are good for the older child 3 +, but I dont think it is the place for babies, but we are all different and we all have a choice to make, but personally I never put any of mine in any younger that 3

this is exactly how I feel about nurseries