never work for friends !!!

**Polly2** · 19-12-2007, 02:14 PM

Hi all

My "friend" has just sent me funny text (not funny haha) because I have charged her when her child was off sick.

She said that she didn't expect to pay because she gave me fair warning and it was under docs advice.

Now until I met you guys I prob would have given in and not charged her but I thought NO WAY!!! How good is that!!

I txt back that it was in her contract and I am sorry if it seems mean but his place was booked and therefore I couldn't take on any other child.

I was very polite

She just txt back ok.

I do favours for this mum all the time - like I work late and only charge basic rates and she changes her days and time around willy nilly so I haven't got a clue what I am doing some weeks!

I decided enough was enough and if she ends contract GOOD!!!

There I feel so much better having got that off my chest!!
Thank you all, you have made me much tougher

**LittleMissSparkles** · 19-12-2007, 02:19 PM

I will never ever childmind for friends ever again after the disaster I hate with my now ex best friend, she never paid on time, would collect at stupid o clock like 6.45 without even phoning me after she left work, I found out she'd go for a sun bed after work etc and get here when she got here iyswim..... to be honest our friendship was dying a death anyway but it was the nail in the coffin and we eventually fell out and we havent spoken for quite a few months now.

Stick to your Guns Polly xxx

**Mollymop** · 19-12-2007, 02:44 PM

It's horrible when people take advantage of your goodness.
I look after my sisters kids in the holidays only when she is off as she works strange shifts, the kids are 11 and 12.
She is is always taking advantage of me. She will go and have her nails done or her hair or her nether region waxed, etc after work with out consulting me first. Or she'll go shopping - She is late picking them up and I ask where she is and she says -Sorry I am in Tescos doing my shopping, I will be there in half an hour, etc. It annoys me, especially when i could be going out and doing MY own thing. But she's the kind of person who doesn't seem to have a concious and when you moan at her about it she will still do it again.

So I can understand when people say don't look after friends and families kids.
So when i am registered her kids, unfortunately won't be on my books, me thinks !!!

**Spangles** · 19-12-2007, 03:04 PM

Good for you! I don't think that I would be as strong as you but you were completely right with what you did.

She obviously has no consideration for you when she chops and changes her times/days so why should you do her any special favours? If she complains I would point out how you only charge her basic charges when you work late yet other people would be charged extra.

**Polly2** · 19-12-2007, 03:57 PM

Thanks all

I think the prob is that when its a friend or family they take advantage a bit and you bend the rules for them a couple of times and then they do it all the time and it's really hard to be tough then.

So all you new childminders out there....learn from my mistakes!!! Start how you mean to go on

She is due to arrive at 5 with my money and I am dreading it.

**carolinel** · 19-12-2007, 04:02 PM

I've also learnt the hard way, looking after my best friends little boy. When he finished I vowed never to work for friends again - it's just a nightmare.

**manjay** · 19-12-2007, 04:08 PM

Good for you Holly!!! I hope it goes ok when she arrives!

Neil had to remind me the other day that I had said I would be tough from the start. My mum has been late twice now - first time was only 5 mins and then this week it was 20 mins. She did let me know both times that she was stuck in traffic. I do feel a bit guilty as some nights she picks them up well before the two hours she pays me for but on the other hand I do not want her to take advantage in the future.

Stick to your guns Holly

Amanda xx

**muminamini** · 19-12-2007, 04:09 PM

Well done Holly - I think what you have said is 100% right and you have been polite and professional. Very interesting reading about other peoples experiences....I think I will avoid looking after friends children after reading this - have already had 2 who are interested and I was a bit unsure about it for these reasons.

Pauline x

**emler** · 19-12-2007, 04:10 PM

Well done Holly. A "friend" should understand more than anyone that you are running a business and shouldn't try to take advantage.
I hope it goes ok at 5 tonight

Emler x

**ajs** · 19-12-2007, 04:12 PM

well done for being tough really

why do friends think we are just there to do favours for them doesn't anyone value what we do

**sarah707** · 19-12-2007, 04:14 PM

Will be thinking about you at 5... GO GIRL!

**Blaze** · 19-12-2007, 11:35 PM

How did it go?
Tasha

**angeldelight** · 20-12-2007, 07:17 AM

Sorry Holly I missed this

How are you today

How did it go at 5 yesterday hope you are ok anyway

Love Angel xx

**Polly2** · 20-12-2007, 08:34 AM

Well she turned up at 5, (I did think she might be late just to spite me!)

Didn't mention the money. So I said, "shall I pop this invoice into babys bag?"

She said "Oh yeah I didn't have chance to go to the bank so I will have to pay you after xmas"

I just agreed, couldn't think of anything to say...honestly I am pathetic sometimes

Don't know what to do now - she was talking of moving baby into a nursery where her sister works and I really wish she would. She gets away with too much with me, I bet she would have a shock if she went elsewhere.

**angeldelight** · 20-12-2007, 08:36 AM

Was your money due though Holly?

She should not be making the rules here

Angel xx

**Polly2** · 20-12-2007, 08:49 AM

yep! money was due.

I charge in arrears (I know most of you charge in advance) yesterday was last day of minding for dec so money was due.

All the other parents have had no prob with this.

She has always paid on time so I think she is just making a point.

never mind, just have to put it down to experience and maybe start charging in advance

**angeldelight** · 20-12-2007, 09:07 AM

Yeah Polly I learnt the hard way too I used to get paid in arrears

More difficult too when she is supposed to be your friend

Oh well christmas is almost here enjoy your holiday and forget about them for a bit

Love Angel xxx

**LittleMissSparkles** · 20-12-2007, 09:22 AM

Originally Posted by Polly2

She said "Oh yeah I didn't have chance to go to the bank so I will have to pay you after xmas"

I'd charged her a late payment fee for every day late she is, christmas is still 5 dasys away and she said after christmas.... when after christmas does she mean !!!! So sorry you are in this prediament xxx

**Blaze** · 20-12-2007, 09:30 AM

I agree with Susan,
You really need to say something...it's not your problem she didn't get to the abnk!
Tasha

**Mickey Mouse Clubhouse** · 20-12-2007, 09:58 AM

I had my niece for 3 years and never again would I work with family they just took advantage all the time and it really got my back up so never again.

You will should get your money before christmas she might spend it otherwise and you might not get it at all.

Lorraine xx