toys from home?

**mushpea** · 21-03-2010, 01:34 PM

when ever children bring toys from home they are always expected to share them with the only exception being dummys or bedtime comfortors which, after naptime, are put up out of the way,,, i have this rule because my children have always been expected to share their toys which are down stairs and also because i think it very unfair that a child should be playing with somthing that no one else can play with.
one little boy last week bought a toy with him and when another child picked it up he raced over and tried to snatch it back, when i said no and explained why to him he had a big sulk (he's 3yrs),, our cdo hapend to be there and saw what happend and comented that it was unfair he should have to share the toy and she would never done that when she was minding.

is it wrong to expect them to share toys? or am i right in saying that toys that are brought to my setting are shared,, parents know this right frm the word go and childrn that come here also learn this and understand it. they also know that if they dont share they dont get it back till home time and its not allowed to come again.

**The Juggler** · 21-03-2010, 01:41 PM

No. I do exactly the same as you. They have a choice, they can share or they can put them away in their bags until home time.

**PixiePetal** · 21-03-2010, 01:57 PM

It is in my policies that anything from home will be shared at their own risk or put up on the shelf till hometime. Plenty of time at home to play with their own toys - I have more than enough here!

**sarah707** · 21-03-2010, 02:03 PM

My policy is exactly the same... share or it goes away until home time.

Parents have always been happy with that when it's explained to them too

**sillysausage** · 21-03-2010, 02:08 PM

I agree with you too. It's generally not an issue now that my kids have grown up (well as grown up as the youngest at 15 can be and sometimes that's worse than a toddler in the terrible two's lol!).
I always said that if they bring toys they must expect to share them just like DS's were expected to share their toys with mindees. If DS's had special toys they didn't want to share then they were kept and played with in their bedrooms. If mindees bring toys and don't want to share them then they go back into their bags ready to go home.
Yes it's nice to have special things, but children need to learn to share and respect each others belongings. I'm sure we all know a child who brings toys, won't share them, and uses the fact that they have this brand new must have toy that they don't have to share, to taunt other children with 'I've got a power-ranger and you can't play with it na na na na na' sort of thing.

**balloon** · 21-03-2010, 02:49 PM

We have the same rule, all toys are shared except special bedtime comforters which are put away unless the child is in bed napping. I cannot imagine the fuss if they were all allowed to bring in toys and only they could play with them...

**Heaven Scent** · 21-03-2010, 03:00 PM

At the moment all but 1 of my mindees are only children and just cannot share if they bring things from home so now I discourage them from bringing them - even bed time comforters (I'm not so cruel I have now managed to wean them all off their comforters from home by giving them all a comforter of their own which stays here and they will take home when they eventually leave) Parents and children are now very happy with this I wouldn't expect a new child to fit in with this system but would eventually wean them into the system.

If a child brings a toy from home other than a comforter then as soon as they step through the door they have to put it straight into their bags and I do this infront of Mummy and Daddy and say - "it has to go away because you won't share and that upsets the other children and you and we don't want sad children" The ones I have now all automatically put them in their bags themselves. Its the same with dummys they only come out for sleep time or if something happens to upset the child or they are ill then they can have them - as I said befor I'm not cruel - just very firm and cant stand whinging Yuk!!!!!

**Heaven Scent** · 21-03-2010, 03:01 PM

At the moment all but 1 of my mindees are only children and just cannot share if they bring things from home so now I discourage them from bringing them - even bed time comforters (I'm not so cruel that I don't allow comfort toys but I have now managed to wean them all off their comforters from home by giving them all a comforter of their own which stays here and they will take home when they eventually leave). Parents and children are now very happy with this I wouldn't expect a new child to fit in with this system but would eventually wean them into the system.

If a child brings a toy from home other than a comforter then as soon as they step through the door they have to put it straight into their bags and I do this infront of Mummy and Daddy and say - "it has to go away because you won't share and that upsets the other children and you and we don't want sad children" The ones I have now all automatically put them in their bags themselves. Its the same with dummys they only come out for sleep time or if something happens to upset the child or they are ill then they can have them - as I said befor I'm not cruel - just very firm and cant stand whinging Yuk!!!!!

**louised** · 21-03-2010, 03:24 PM

I actually have it written in my policies that toys should be left at home, although some parents blatantly ignore this just for a quiet life and let their children bring armloads of toys with them. If the toys are not shared, which quite often they're not they go straight in the childs bag, they spend more time in the bag than out.

**babs** · 21-03-2010, 03:54 PM

same rule applies in my house too share or please leave at home...

**karen m** · 21-03-2010, 03:57 PM

i explain to all parents that i have ample toys so child does not need to bring from home most parents agree but 1 parent in particular says lo would not come without teddy,doll ,she is a madamn lol really annoys me this child is nearly 3when she refuses to share away it goes till home time parent told she won't share and she replies i no she like that with everything

anyway told her now if she insists that she bring it she puts it in her bag till home timeand i mean once she has left my setting as parent often took it and gave it to her when she put coat on

**Jules27** · 21-03-2010, 04:04 PM

Same as the rest, any toys go straight in their bags - therefore no fighting over stuff. One LO am sure its her dad who wants her to bring all the toys - i have watched him from my window clearly asking what she wants to take in to Julie's house, anything else??? GRRRR makes me cross!! But little one pops everything in her bag herself now the minute she is in the door!!!! and surprise surprise they stay there until home time!!!

**Mouse** · 21-03-2010, 04:40 PM

I'm quite easy going about it and don't mind if children bring toys from home. If they want to share it it's fine, but if they don't want to I explain to the other children that the toy belongs to X and they will have to play with something else. Just as children have to learn to share, they also have to learn that there are times when they can't have want they want.

In all my years of childminding it's never caused a problem, but I would probably rethink my policy if it did become an issue.

**mushpea** · 21-03-2010, 05:18 PM

Thanks guys, think i was just looking for a bit of reassurance that i wasnt being mean making him share and that i was doing the right thing,

**jelly15** · 21-03-2010, 06:38 PM

Yep, share or it goes away.

**zillervalley** · 21-03-2010, 07:58 PM

yeah agree share or away it goes in the bag till home time, like the thoughts of a policy on toys from home, will be my next job I think because from time to time I have a problem with toys being brought.

think your cdo was wrong to comment on your practice

ziller

**zillervalley** · 21-03-2010, 08:00 PM

Originally Posted by mushpea

Thanks guys, think i was just looking for a bit of reassurance that i wasnt being mean making him share and that i was doing the right thing,

mushpea just noticed you have over a thousand threads and you are amber

do you not want to go green

ziller

**charliegee** · 21-03-2010, 10:44 PM

I do ask that toys are left at home but if the same happened with me - I think I would be the same - that toys should be shared or if not put away.

I think if something was a very "special" toy then perhaps it would be best left at home as there could be lots of tears if it were lost at a toddlers / broken etc

x

**mushpea** · 22-03-2010, 06:53 AM

Originally Posted by zillervalley

mushpea just noticed you have over a thousand threads and you are amber

do you not want to go green

ziller

probably being thick, again!

, but what do you mean by go green and how would i do it?

**singingcactus** · 22-03-2010, 07:43 AM

Bah, your cdo needs to wind her neck in! It is your home, and they are your mindees, you know them well and you know whether sharing their own toys will cause them unnecessary upset or not. Sharing is not a big deal.
I don't do it that way, but I like to allow my own child to have his own special toys that only he can play with, cos lately all my mindees have been very destructive children who will deliberately break or smash my resources.
I do have a rule though that they don't leave their special toys lying around, they store them away and if they want to play alone with them they sit on the red sofa with them - that is the place the kids go to get personal space. If you are on the main floor then it is free for all.