Far too long for lunch!

**pirateship** · 07-12-2009, 01:45 PM

I've got a mindee that takes an hour and a half to eat lunch!

When we don't have anywhere to go it's not so bad but we've been missing groups because of it.

If she's like it again tomorrow I'm going to take her food away for her to eat at snack time. Is this unfair of me? What do you think her parent will say?

I'm sure I've read somewhere that half hour is sufficient. I think 45 mins is about right. Any thoughts?

**ChocolateChip** · 07-12-2009, 02:53 PM

I don't have time to let my mindees sit there for an hour and a half, and if it starting to impact on your other plans then that's not great.
Did the mum say anything about this, does she do it at home?
Think you need to ask mum and see what she says, if it doesn't happen at home then just give her so long to finish and clear away, she will soon get the picture!
If she is like it at home then you may need to have a chat with mum if it is starting to curtail the activities and impact on the other children, offer to work out how you can accomodate her, sit her up earlier than the others, maybe keep a food diary to make sure she is eating enough, maybe it's too much for her?
Whatever you decide to do though, try not to make it an issue with the child otherwise it will just become a battle ground.
You don't say how old she is, but mine are all 2or 3 and they finish in about half an hour normally, that's a plate of finger food- sandwiches or crackers and cheese, a few organix veg snax like carrot sticks, etc., some tomato or cucumber, a portion of fruit and something like a yoghurt to follow.
Do you give her finger food or a cooked lunch? Is it what she's used to, it may just be that she's getting used to your house and ways, I had one who used to just sit and twiddle his fork for 20 mins at tea time and watch everyone else before he started. Again ask mum, she may not have been sat up to a table at home, and I find that some parents will 'do it all for them, as it is quicker.

Sorry, that's all a bit rambled but hope some of it helps!

**pirateship** · 07-12-2009, 05:16 PM

Thanks. Mum provides the food and I do think it's a little too much - although mindee does eat it all eventually! I'll speak to the Mum and tell her it's interfering with our day and see if she's OK with me clearing away after 45 mins to an hour. I think that's more than enough time. Thanks again.

**Mouse** · 07-12-2009, 05:30 PM

I have a mum who sends way too much for mindee's lunch. He could sit & eat it all, but it would take forever. He's 3 & can have more in his lunch box than even I would eat.
I take some of the food out for morning snack & some for afternoon snack. The rest he has for lunch. It seems to work well for him & lunchtime is a more reasonable time (normally less than half an hour)

I have mentioned to mum that he doesn't really need that much food, but she says she doesn't want him to go hungry. The problem is, he is a bit greedy & will keep eating food if it's there in front of him. She thinks this means he is still hungry & so keeps feeding him. I gave her some info on portion size, but she doesn't seem to get it.

**terrydoo73** · 07-12-2009, 09:43 PM

SNAP! I have one that does the same and he is 2 1/2 years of age - always has. Hubby and I have come to the conclusion that he is lazy and mum and dad don't help the situation any at home - they just leave him at the table after everything is cleared away. As they go past him they shove a spoonful into his mouth, when his older sister stops and chats with him he responds - I count it as attention seeking. I set the limit in my house as maximum 45 minutes - what is not eaten is put back into his lunch box so mum can see what exactly he did eat that day.

I have found that getting him to sleep before he eats seems to work a miracle on him - he definately eats far better. Also if there is change in the house ie someone new he will sit and stare at them eating and will not eat himself. I usually would close the door between him and the other mindees so as not to distract him. I have on occasions just left him to it and after a period of time gone back and he has not eaten anything so we set the time limit now which is easier to work with. His mum knows the hang ups he has with food.

Funny enough when he sees chocolate, crisps or anything sweet he is not long in clearing the plate!

**Pudding Girl** · 07-12-2009, 09:52 PM

I have some who bring a suitcase almost full of food each day, there's just no need for it even I couldn't eat that much!
I've told them and they still do so have just started using that for their snacks in the afternoon and leave something to take home each day too.

Very annoying though when I buy/prepare in advance for snacks and they are getting wasted.