Don't Agree With Mum!

**anneriddington** · 26-02-2008, 02:26 PM

I mind a little girl who was two in December. Her mum arrived today with a bag of pants and one spare pair of jeans and said she won't wear a nappy anymore! So shes going to go ito pants. S comes to me Mon-Thurs 10-4.00 and even though we have introduced the potty and toilet etc to her she has yet to wee on it! I have told mum this but took the bag of spares and said to her I would see how the morning went.

Whenever I asked S if she needed the potty she said yes, she is happy to sit and when I asked her if she has finished she says yes- but the pot is empty

She has soiled and wet three times this morning and so I have put on the nappy mum put in her bag.

I feel S is not yet ready to leave off nappies I did suggest pull ups but mum won't hear of it. (She has always used Tesco value nappies and won't pay the price of pull ups) I am going to chat to mum when she collects S later but wondered what you ladies think

**Twinkles** · 26-02-2008, 02:28 PM

I'd suggest she takes a week off to potty train her if that's what she wants to do

**Spangles** · 26-02-2008, 02:28 PM

Poor little girl! She doesn't sound ready at all. It's not like she wees on the potty at all so there's nothing positive coming out of this at all. I think she'll just get disheartened. Sounds like she doesn't understand any of this at all.

I agree with you, you need to chat to the mum.

**anneriddington** · 26-02-2008, 02:31 PM

I think the problem is that mum is a courier delivery person and she spent the first year of her life sat in a child seat! Mum is comparing her to her other "4" children and thinks she should be dry now, I agree it is a shame, mum is always in a rush and harrassed! The only reason I keep her on my books is I can't face sending her back to sitting in a car all day

**Banana** · 26-02-2008, 02:32 PM

I would agree with you on that. You need to soeak to mum! However I wouldnt suggest pull ups, I personally think they are a waste of time and lengthen the amount of time potty training can take as they are confusinig for the child. If they wet themselves they stay dry and thats what you want to get out of their mind, being wet isnt nice and they soon learn that

Saying this, I do not think from what you have said that the little girl is ready and would sit down with mum witha cuppa and just explain this. Say you appreciate that she would like to try the potty training but it is clear that from how many accidents the chhild has had she is not ready. It is not fair on you ar the child to continue while she is not ready as it is distressing for both parties.

Good luck. And let us know how you get on. Dont back down on this one. Tell the mum until she has been dry for a weekend with VERY minmal accidents you will have to used nappies

x

**anneriddington** · 26-02-2008, 02:35 PM

I agree with you on the pull ups front - it was really a better alternative that continual wetting

This little girl needs time, but I think she gets a bit lost in the madness at home.

**Spangles** · 26-02-2008, 02:38 PM

We bought some nappies called 'feel n learn', might have been Pampers. They can feel when they are wet so they get the idea but my son didn't care less about being wet so we've given up for a few more months!!!

You can also get ones where the pictures on the front fade when they are wet. Can someone please tell me what the heck the point of those are??? Unless they're running around only in nappies and staring at them all day how the heck are they supposed to work? Weird!

**yummymummy** · 26-02-2008, 02:42 PM

Ah poor you Anne, I have a 2 1/2 year old who is sent every day in pull ups and with a potty but she just does everything in the pull ups and only ever poos when she naps so I can't even catch that!
She is not ready yet and so defeats the whole point of pull up pants if anything it just makes it harder for me to change her as she always wears tights!
In my case the parents don't mind that she does everthing in the pull ups but I would definitely be speaking to them if like you she had accidents left right and centre. It will get to the stage where you'll never be able to take her anywhere!
potty training yet another of a childminders blessings!!!!!!

**Rubybubbles** · 26-02-2008, 02:42 PM

she's still very young only turning 2 in Dec and agree she probably ain't ready

**ruby** · 26-02-2008, 02:47 PM

we tried before christmas to potty train one of ours but she just wet herself and carried on playing so we had a word with her parents and decided to try after christmas- have restarted this week
she is now asking to go but is still starting in her pants but this is an improvement and if you take her to the toilet she does wee
so we will carry on as she needs to be dry before starting nursery in april

i would really have a word with the mother its not fair on you or her daughter if she is not ready yet .

cathy

**anneriddington** · 26-02-2008, 02:51 PM

Thanks Cathy
by the way love your Rainbow Rabbit avavtar - are you a rainbow leader by any change?

**anneriddington** · 26-02-2008, 02:52 PM

oops just read my awful typing - sorry

**Heaven Scent** · 26-02-2008, 03:09 PM

I agree I think she is far too young they need to have the concentration to sit on the potty and wait and for that they need to be about 2.5. I thought that all nurseries and playgroups had to take children whether they are in nappies or not now. I'm sure that the woman who runs playgroup at my daughters school told me that.

Celine:

**anneriddington** · 26-02-2008, 03:12 PM

Yes thats my understanding of playgroups. Our village one certainly takes children still in nappies.

There's no reason for S to be out of nappies other than mums wishes. Am certainly going to discuss it with her at home time

**anneriddington** · 26-02-2008, 03:47 PM

Mum has just picked up S. Explained to her how they day has gone. Her response was "Oh I'll stick a nappy back onher then"

I do feel like Ive been used better me putting in the effort than mum!!

**sarah707** · 26-02-2008, 03:50 PM

Love your penguin Anne!

I always tell parents they must start the process at home first and have a child who is fairly reliable before they come back to me - I don't want my furnishings covered in wee! I don't mind the odd accident but a child who is not ready mustn't be rushed!

Get the woman told Anne!

**emmadines** · 26-02-2008, 04:01 PM

my little girl was 2 in jan and is potty training now, ONLY because she showed interest and she is doing fine! very few wet nickers and she hasnt soiled them either.
NOT every child is ready to start potty training at this age and this lil girllike you said does not seem ready! maybe the mother should go back to nappies for another month or so and start again!

good luck

**crazybones** · 26-02-2008, 04:06 PM

My son showed an interest last week so at the weekend we started to try. No luck - gave up - back in nappies. I am not pushing even though my other two were dry by now.

Annie x