Stop doing the school run
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  1. #1
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    Default Stop doing the school run

    Hi All, I need some advice!! I am thinking of stopping doing the school run altogether. Come September I will have 3 pre-schoolers everyday, this means that they will be with me both on the morning school run and the afternoon. I have a mindee who is starting school in September, he has been with me about 3 years, mum has got him into the local school so that I can take him and collect him. Thing is, I really don't want to do it. Its going to be a nightmare getting all the kids in and out of the car to take him into the classroom. I have been childminding for 11 years and I have had the last year just doing the occasional drop off and collection to help out when the parents shifts clash so thats not been an issue but everyday day every morning and afternoon is starting to freak me out!! How would you word it to the mum of the child who is due to start in September. I really need some advise as its starting to make me feel ill with worry. Thank you xx

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    Hello and welcome.

    That is a really hard decision to have made, and well done for doing so. Telling mum will be hard too. Do you know any other childminders who collect/drop off at the school? or before/after school club? maybe you could just do 1 or 2 days, or just a couple of collections? I do 2 drop offs a week, and 4 collections, and if I could drop the drop offs I would, but I can't!

    I would just explain to mum, sooner rather than later, that although you have done an occasional school run this year, you have realised how much it will impact on the younger children to do a school run every day, and you have a duty of care to all children, and it just isn't going to work for you.

    good luck

    xx

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    Thank you so much for the advice! I was seriously getting wound up over it and couldn't think straight. Wish me Luck (although I feel terrible)

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    good luck. could you perhaps do a little research and give mum the details of what other options there are?

    xxx


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    I agree with Loocylou. Bite the bullet and tell the parent sooner than later, so at least she’ll have time to make other arrangements.i’m doing 3 trips to a school twice a week ( take to nursery/school am and collect from nursery midday and then from school pm. Can’t wait for midday trip to stop impacts on whole day.so don’t take it on if you don’t want to.

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    Definitely tell mum sooner rather than later.

    Strictly speaking your only obligation is to see out the current arrangement: the school run is an entirely different contract.

    The problem is that no one else is going to see it that way. We all know the reality is one of asymmetrical relationships between parents and CMs. Parents can walk away anytime and we have to suck it up, but we’re the bad guys if we ever give notice or change anything. We can complain all we like about the fundamental unfairness of this, but we’re stuck with it.

    What’s at stake is the effect on your reputation and the trust that current and future/potential clients will have in you.

    It sounds like this mum had at least some reasonable expectation you were going to be doing the school run for her, and for some considerable time too. I hardly need spell out her likely reaction to being told that won’t be happening.

    I do think you need to handle this carefully and do whatever you can to soften the blow, short of being railroaded into a long term arrangement you don’t want. That might mean putting her in touch with other CMs who serve the school and possibly doing the school run yourself for a short while until they have space, or to ease transition. Or if she can find someone else soon, let her go without insisting on the usual notice period. That will give the child a chance to settle in before having to face the challenges of school as well.

    In terms of my school, it would already be far too late for a parent to be looking for a September start with a CM. I’ve always found that starting a new school and a new CM together is fraught with problems (I have to say, I now turn down all such requests after some awful experiences.)

    So I think you’re going to have to be honest, be quick about it, and be prepared to compromise in the short term.
    Last edited by bunyip; 30-05-2018 at 04:54 PM.

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    Great reply Bunyip, succinctly outlining the issues and giving some suggestions.
    Difficult situation but I think Bunyip has said everything that I was thinking.

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    Thank you everyone. I can definitely see the upset it will cause thats why I am so wound up. I feel I have to do the best for the little one and put aside my apprehension. Hopefully I will be able to do the school run for a little while and see how it goes. If it really does have an impact then I will give notice with suggestions of before/after school places, obviously I will continue until the little one has a new placement (if it happens at all). We have all had that parent who is late or is very early and this is that parent, the parent who needs all the attention even if other parents are around. Maybe its a subconscious thing that I dont want it to continue. Oh my word, my head is everywhere I think the wine is needed, is it too early Thanks everyone.
    PS - How do you 'like' comments added to a post? xx

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  13. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by cleaning fairy View Post
    Thank you everyone. I can definitely see the upset it will cause thats why I am so wound up. I feel I have to do the best for the little one and put aside my apprehension. Hopefully I will be able to do the school run for a little while and see how it goes. If it really does have an impact then I will give notice with suggestions of before/after school places, obviously I will continue until the little one has a new placement (if it happens at all). We have all had that parent who is late or is very early and this is that parent, the parent who needs all the attention even if other parents are around. Maybe its a subconscious thing that I dont want it to continue. Oh my word, my head is everywhere I think the wine is needed, is it too early Thanks everyone.
    PS - How do you 'like' comments added to a post? xx
    I use a laptop or tappy-tablet, and there is a "like this post" option beneath each post. Not sure if this is the same when using a 'phone app. (I don’t trust any software written by anyone who thinks "application" is too big a word to handle.)

    At the risk of patronising, I get the strong impression you’re undecided what to do and why. I think it would be good to get your thoughts straight first, and this may mean talking it over confidentially with either a trusted partner or someone completely neutral (like this forum or a Pacey Associate.)

    Is this really about the logistical problems of the school run, or is it that the mum just bugs the heck out of you? Either can be a perfectly good reason for ending the arrangement. But if you can identify the problem, you can then make a proper decision, and maybe look at alternative solutions. Could you work with mum if you found strategies to help her be more bearable?

    You clearly prioritise the child’s best interests. Just be careful that you don’t let that lead to you being manipulated. There is no shortage of mums who’ll use their CM's good, child-centred nature for their own convenience.
    Last edited by bunyip; 31-05-2018 at 09:20 AM.

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