Just had a family warn that they'll be giving notice in the near future
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  1. #1
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    Default Just had a family warn that they'll be giving notice in the near future

    It was last week and at the end of the day Mum came round and said that due to changes in her work she'd have to find an alternative childcare arrangement, my jaw was on the floor when she told me. I tend to take everything personally and worry that I've done something wrong or failed somehow.

    Dad filled in a questionnaire a couple of weeks ago and said that they were very happy (5 times) and that their two children love coming, so I'm probably (maybe, possibly) worrying for nothing. I can't help it through, I still have nagging worries.

    Ive only been caring for these children since May (TTO) but I feel that we're made good progress and the baby in particular seems to love me and jumps at me (even after holiday breaks) I'm not good at change or surprises.

    Do other people feel completely taken aback when a parent first mentions giving notice in the future?

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    Quote Originally Posted by greenfaerie View Post
    It was last week and at the end of the day Mum came round and said that due to changes in her work she'd have to find an alternative childcare arrangement, my jaw was on the floor when she told me. I tend to take everything personally and worry that I've done something wrong or failed somehow.

    Dad filled in a questionnaire a couple of weeks ago and said that they were very happy (5 times) and that their two children love coming, so I'm probably (maybe, possibly) worrying for nothing. I can't help it through, I still have nagging worries.

    Ive only been caring for these children since May (TTO) but I feel that we're made good progress and the baby in particular seems to love me and jumps at me (even after holiday breaks) I'm not good at change or surprises.

    Do other people feel completely taken aback when a parent first mentions giving notice in the future?
    Yes, it can be very upsetting. And over the years it still hurts when it happens again. You have worked hard to make the children settle and feel part of your family. It can hurt but did mum say exactly what her new requirements are? Maybe you still may be able to help but shorter contract?

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    I didn't really want to feel like I was prying, so I didn't really ask much. (I often have problems with things like that) She said that work was going to require more unset shifts and more flexibility from her, I was thinking maybe because I'm TTO it would no longer work? I think my entire worries have come from her saying she needs a new childcare solution, but not telling me why. :S

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    They must think a lot of you to give you prior notice. A lot of parents would wait until they knew what their exact plans were before telling their childminder, but your parents think enough of you to tell you in advance. Take is as a compliment and don't worry that you have done something wrong.

    I would ask mum if there's anything you can do to help with the new arrangements, but if she says you can't, I would carry on as you are and, when it comes time for them to leave, it can all be done on very good terms

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    Quote Originally Posted by greenfaerie View Post
    I didn't really want to feel like I was prying, so I didn't really ask much. (I often have problems with things like that) She said that work was going to require more unset shifts and more flexibility from her, I was thinking maybe because I'm TTO it would no longer work? I think my entire worries have come from her saying she needs a new childcare solution, but not telling me why. :S
    If you don't feel you can ask outright, put it in a letter. Say thank you for letting you know that their arrangements will be changing in the future and that if they would like to discuss arrangements, in case you can work something out, you'd be more than happy to make a time to have a chat.

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    Oh, it's heart wrenching. Even if I'm expecting it, I feel awful and think it's all my fault even when I know it isn't!
    And when it comes out of the blue it's just terrible. And no matter what the parents say I think it's my fault.

    But with a day or night to think it over I can usually get it straight in my head and come to terms with it.

    Take care, big hug x

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    Thanks guys for the lovely comments, as usual.

    I've always been bad at saying goodbye to children, and that was when half my income didn't rely on them.

    Also I tend to want to avoid making things awkward and seem like I'm being undignified.

    I think a letter is a good idea, as I can think of what I want to put, rather than risk putting my foot in my mouth.

    Mum was a bit vague with dates, she mentioned late December, but also possibly February, so I need clarification on that. O_o And I'm aware I should inform her of the contractual need for 4 weeks written notice, just so she's aware.

    It took a couple of days, but I managed to see some positives of downsizing at the moment.

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    notice is my biggest fear!

    Last year this time I had 13 children on various contracts, I then got 3 families all give notice at the same time - all for reasons which were not personal to my setting or me! but I got so paranoid about lack of business and no new comers...that one day another mum turned up with an envelope in her hand! I literally felt sick thinking it was another letter of notice - I almost laughed at myself when I opened it an it was a thank you picture/note from mindee for their birthday present

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    Yes, it's horrible. Even when you are expecting it it's not nice. It does sound like she has a genuine reason for leaving, one that isn't anything bad about you. xxx

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    Quote Originally Posted by greenfaerie View Post
    Thanks guys for the lovely comments, as usual.

    I've always been bad at saying goodbye to children, and that was when half my income didn't rely on them.

    Also I tend to want to avoid making things awkward and seem like I'm being undignified.

    I think a letter is a good idea, as I can think of what I want to put, rather than risk putting my foot in my mouth.

    Mum was a bit vague with dates, she mentioned late December, but also possibly February, so I need clarification on that. O_o And I'm aware I should inform her of the contractual need for 4 weeks written notice, just so she's aware.

    It took a couple of days, but I managed to see some positives of downsizing at the moment.
    I think it is the 'vagueness' in the parent that should dictate how you respond.
    if she is aware of 'changes in her work' I would say she has an idea what is happening...or is she waiting for another setting to free a space so she can take it up?

    My response would be 'I need to fill your space so would appreciate clearer dates as I will start advertising from now'
    That should work and not leave you guessing when all this is going to happen.

    Good luck!

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    I had the opposite once where a family had given warning of notice for their daughter at a nursery as they were waiting for house sale to go through so they really couldn't give a proper date. They told the nursery that they would give notice in the near future and would understand they would need to give 4 weeks notice and would pay full notice even if they moved and didn't use it. The following week the nursery gave them 4 weeks notice instead saying they had filled her space. Mum called round childminders in a panic not knowing what to do. We had a fantastic 5 weeks of 4 full days a week with the lo, some very appreciative parents who gave me some fantastic loose parts for my garden play when clearing their own garden (things like lengths of decking that we now use to build ramps in the garden with) and also gave me a John Lewis voucher to buy something nice for the setting too - we bought a rebounder to stop balls going over the fence. I know the short term work wouldn't work for everyone but it worked for us. Anyway just saying it can be really hard to give dates and some families are being genuinely kind trying to prewarn their childcare providers. I would explain notice period and that you would be looking to fill the space as soon after they don't need the space anymore.

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    Quote Originally Posted by samb View Post
    The following week the nursery gave them 4 weeks notice instead saying they had filled her space. Mum called round childminders in a panic not knowing what to do.
    I can't believe the nursery did that! That's awful, especially since they were being so considerate.

    Well, I chatted to Dad at drop off yesterday, just to remind him that even though they'd kindly talked about notice, I'd need a written note for the official last 4 weeks. His response was along of the lines of "Didn't Mum talk to you? She thinks work have sorted it" (!!!!!) Now I'm absolutely confused as to what is happening. O_o I just wish it was Mum who did the pick up more often, since it'd be easier to communicate with her in person.

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    Quote Originally Posted by samb View Post
    I had the opposite once where a family had given warning of notice for their daughter at a nursery as they were waiting for house sale to go through so they really couldn't give a proper date. They told the nursery that they would give notice in the near future and would understand they would need to give 4 weeks notice and would pay full notice even if they moved and didn't use it. The following week the nursery gave them 4 weeks notice instead saying they had filled her space. Mum called round childminders in a panic not knowing what to do. We had a fantastic 5 weeks of 4 full days a week with the lo, some very appreciative parents who gave me some fantastic loose parts for my garden play when clearing their own garden (things like lengths of decking that we now use to build ramps in the garden with) and also gave me a John Lewis voucher to buy something nice for the setting too - we bought a rebounder to stop balls going over the fence. I know the short term work wouldn't work for everyone but it worked for us. Anyway just saying it can be really hard to give dates and some families are being genuinely kind trying to prewarn their childcare providers. I would explain notice period and that you would be looking to fill the space as soon after they don't need the space anymore.
    I got my very first family in a similar situation. The mum had been honest and told her childminder that they had put the house on the market and had had accepted an offer on it but didn't know how long she would be still there for - again, she was willing to pay the four weeks notice etc but was just keeping her childminder in the picture. The childminder gave her notice - not the extra stress you need when moving, but obviously now I can see both sides of it. I looked after her for 13 weeks and it was a great way into the profession for me because I knew that I could test out my contracts and policies and iron out any creases for when I took on my next long term clients. We still keep in touch now, six years later.

    Even when I know the children will be leaving because they are starting school, or when as above I knew that they would be moving house, the moment you have that conversation about dates, it is still stressful. To come out of the blue is worse because you can't rehearse the conversation in your head. xx

  16. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by samb View Post
    I had the opposite once where a family had given warning of notice for their daughter at a nursery as they were waiting for house sale to go through so they really couldn't give a proper date. They told the nursery that they would give notice in the near future and would understand they would need to give 4 weeks notice and would pay full notice even if they moved and didn't use it. The following week the nursery gave them 4 weeks notice instead saying they had filled her space. Mum called round childminders in a panic not knowing what to do. We had a fantastic 5 weeks of 4 full days a week with the lo, some very appreciative parents who gave me some fantastic loose parts for my garden play when clearing their own garden (things like lengths of decking that we now use to build ramps in the garden with) and also gave me a John Lewis voucher to buy something nice for the setting too - we bought a rebounder to stop balls going over the fence. I know the short term work wouldn't work for everyone but it worked for us. Anyway just saying it can be really hard to give dates and some families are being genuinely kind trying to prewarn their childcare providers. I would explain notice period and that you would be looking to fill the space as soon after they don't need the space anymore.
    Of course ...some parents can be very good with notice while others a bit vague.
    I was thinking from the point of view that some cms have 'complicated' contracts/conditions with their LAs and may have to give back funding if the child was funded for the 15 hours....this may also apply to EYPP which some LAs will want back.....as this funding is supposed 'to follow the child'!

    So getting a rough idea of a leaving date may help with the administration and avoids losing money

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    Oh yes definitely simona just not always possible. Difficult as if parent hadn't said anything but had been planning it a long time before mentioning it and then just gave notice it would also feel gutting for the op.

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    Quote Originally Posted by samb View Post
    Oh yes definitely simona just not always possible. Difficult as if parent hadn't said anything but had been planning it a long time before mentioning it and then just gave notice it would also feel gutting for the op.
    We must keep this issue in mind when it comes to having to pay back funding...it was raised at the NW Summit yesterday
    I am sure we need to have clearer guidance of where we stand when parents decide to leave one setting for another in the middle of a funded term!

    Hope it all works out for you in the end

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    Quote Originally Posted by Simona View Post
    We must keep this issue in mind when it comes to having to pay back funding...it was raised at the NW Summit yesterday
    I am sure we need to have clearer guidance of where we stand when parents decide to leave one setting for another in the middle of a funded term!

    Hope it all works out for you in the end
    Very good point Simona. There are so many holes in 'all of this'.

  21. #18
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    Sorry to deviate a little.
    Can anyone tell me if their LA pays the EYPP at the end of term...or at what point do they pay for eligible children?

    Does your LA ask you refund the EYPP if a child leaves mid term?...
    Do they ask for funding for 15 hours to be given back if a child leaves mid term?

    It would help to put these points on my agenda for a meeting on 5 December which will discuss the Spending Review.

    Many thanks

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    Quote Originally Posted by Simona View Post
    Sorry to deviate a little.
    Can anyone tell me if their LA pays the EYPP at the end of term...or at what point do they pay for eligible children?

    Does your LA ask you refund the EYPP if a child leaves mid term?...
    Do they ask for funding for 15 hours to be given back if a child leaves mid term?

    It would help to put these points on my agenda for a meeting on 5 December which will discuss the Spending Review.

    Many thanks
    I received EYPP money in October for a child who was eligible in the summer term. This child started school in September so not even at the setting anymore. My understanding is that we will get paid a term behind.
    Pixie Dust

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    I think the issue of notice and funding is different to what the op was talking about?

    But to give my experience of funding and notice... I had a family tell me this time last year they would be moving- twins with 2 year funding 15 hours. I spoke to my la who agreed that she could move funding at half term feb and when I put in my headcount form I had to fill in for the amount of weeks up to half term.

    I had another family start for 1.5 weeks of funding this term and then tell me they wanted to leave to take up preschool place. They knew that funding tied them into the term but as it was near the beginning of term and it suited my personal circumstances that they would leave sooner I called the LA again who again said they can leave that week. Not really ideal as I would have liked a notice period the option was leave now or see out the term. I have already been paid for estimate payment so they will invoice me in January for the refund.

    I haven't had the extra payment but I think it is paid at end of term here.

    Our terms and conditions of funding are that if family leaves mid term they cannot transfer the funding. But as you can see from my examples in reality the LA will change for individual cases.

    When a family signs up for funding with me I do let them know they are tied in for the term and must let me know at half term if they will not continue with funding the following term or risk losing it.

 

 
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