My child calls me by my first name

**HTSMumma** · 08-10-2014, 09:13 AM

Hello.
I wondered anybody else has experienced this.
I started childminding when my son was 14 months old (he's now 2yrs, 5 months). He briefly referred to me as mumma but then started calling me by my first name. Everyone kept saying it's because he hears all the other children call me by my name, but as my husband is my eldest children's step father, he gets called by his first name by everyone, except for our son who calls him daddy.
I don't understand it. My older two call me mummy and my youngest knows that I'm mummy, but seems to prefer calling me by my first name. Both my husband and I have easy to say names.

As you can probably tell, I don't like it. I love being 'mummy' and feel that it is a special honour to be called it. I try to correct him, but then he thinks it's a game and enjoys the pretend argument of:
'name!'
'no, it's mummy!'
'name!'
'no, it's mummy!'
'name!'
'MUMMY!!!!!'
And so on..... He falls about laughing at me. I do try not to make a big deal about it, but I just wish he'd call me mummy. I always refer to myself as mummy, and talk in the third person... 'Mummy needs to change your nappy'.

Any ideas? Anyone experienced this before?!?
Help!!!
Thank you in advance.

**shortstuff** · 08-10-2014, 09:18 AM

Sorry i have no wisdom to offer. I started when ds was almost 6.

It must be tough to hear so wanted to send hugs x

**Mouse** · 08-10-2014, 09:34 AM

I do think it's quite common with childminder's children as they're so used to hearing other people call you by your name. Or perhaps he likes your name and to him it's very specific to you. After all, just about every one he knows probably has a mummy called 'mummy'! Perhaps he likes the uniqueness of you having a real name!

I'd suggest not getting into the game with him. If he calls you by your name, just ignore him until he calls you mummy. When he asks you something don't respond unless he says mummy. Do it a few times and he'll soon get the idea

**loocyloo** · 08-10-2014, 09:44 AM

Originally Posted by Mouse

I do think it's quite common with childminder's children as they're so used to hearing other people call you by your name. Or perhaps he likes your name and to him it's very specific to you. After all, just about every one he knows probably has a mummy called 'mummy'! Perhaps he likes the uniqueness of you having a real name!

I'd suggest not getting into the game with him. If he calls you by your name, just ignore him until he calls you mummy. When he asks you something don't respond unless he says mummy. Do it a few times and he'll soon get the idea

I don't answer my children unless I'm called mummy!
I was a nanny when ds was a baby and already childminding when I had dd and they have grown up hearing me called ' loocyloo '. If they are talking about me or passing on messages etc they call me by my name to mindees but otherwise I get called mummy!
Occasionally I get called mummy by mindees, this morning I got called granny! I often get called assorted teachers names and I know the teachers get called mummy ( even the male teacher! ) I feel sorry for one mindee ... I volunteer in her class and she has to remember to call me ' mrs xyz ' !

**HTSMumma** · 08-10-2014, 10:00 AM

Originally Posted by Mouse

I do think it's quite common with childminder's children as they're so used to hearing other people call you by your name. Or perhaps he likes your name and to him it's very specific to you. After all, just about every one he knows probably has a mummy called 'mummy'! Perhaps he likes the uniqueness of you having a real name!

I'd suggest not getting into the game with him. If he calls you by your name, just ignore him until he calls you mummy. When he asks you something don't respond unless he says mummy. Do it a few times and he'll soon get the idea

Sorry, I should have also mentioned that I've done this too. He's persistent, I'll give him that. I've ignored and ignored, but I don't think he quite understands why I'm not answering him.
This is why, when he calls me by my name, I say 'mummy' and refer to myself in the third person.
I think he knows I like to be called mummy, he just has got into a habit of calling me by my name.

I'm really hoping he will grow out of it or finally understand that I prefer him calling me mummy, but I just wondered if anyone has experienced this before and if they had a miracle answers.

**FussyElmo** · 08-10-2014, 10:13 AM

My older brother always called my dad by his name. Yet my and my other brother always said dad.

Maybe he likes the banter between when he calls you your name not mum.

It may be a way that he has found that he gets your undivided attention.

I had a girl mindee once who called her mum by her name but in fairness that was the name she always hear. Me at the door Hi J. We had to change our way of speaking for a while me and her granddad. By saying Mum instead J.

**skatie** · 08-10-2014, 11:04 AM

My ds2 was very little when I started childminding and he too used to call me by my first name, much to the amusement of friends and family. It didn't bother me in the slightest as he was only copying what he heard other people call me. He now mostly calls me mum or mumma but every now and then still calls me by my first name in a cheeky sort of way.

**clareelizabeth1** · 08-10-2014, 11:57 AM

My mum was a childminder and I used to call her by her name to get her attention as often she ignored mummy as tomany other people are called mummy so when out she didn't always answer. But if it's any help I am now 25 and do now call her mummy.

As for my own son he calls me Clare don't know why as currently all my mindies call me Mummy. I just let him as although the name mummy in an honour i just revel in the fact that I m the one he wants to spend his time with. So in the end my name is irrelevant.

**dolly1985** · 08-10-2014, 12:56 PM

When I was a child I never called my dad 'dad' it was always 'Neil' don't know why!! But even now I would never say Dad!! I call my mum 'mum' but sometime even now I'll say 'Shar'. My partners mum thinks it's very disrespectful to call a parent by their first name but I just think if it's normal for you and your family that fine!!

One of my mindees calls her mum Opi and the mum doesn't like being called 'mum'!!

**zanacal** · 08-10-2014, 01:45 PM

My 4 year old son has been calling my husband by his first name instead of dad/daddy for a few months now! It amuses me and frustrates my husband! If we ask him why he calls him it, he says it's because it's his name! I wouldn't worry about it, just go with the flow and hope it's a phase (they usually are ;-)) x

**HTSMumma** · 08-10-2014, 07:53 PM

Thanks for your replies. It's reassuring to know that others have experienced this.

I think I'm a little sensitive to him calling me by my first name and his dad 'daddy' because daddy is the clear favourite. He wants daddy all the time and gets upset when he goes out (husband is self-employed and works from home so it's not like he misses him). So this calling me by my name thing is just another kick in the womb I carried him in!!!

I'm really hoping he'll grow out of it and enjoy calling me mummy when he's a little older and understands.

Thanks again.

**Happiness** · 08-10-2014, 10:08 PM

Hmmm. One of my mindees calls me mummy and is extrimely clingy too. I don't correct him or tell him off ( he is lovely by the way ) but deep down I am a bit upset about it. My daughter who is 27 months old keeps telling him off lol. She says MY MUMMY, ZZZZZ MUMMY. I feel sorry for her sometimes. It breaks my heart. I love my job and my mindees but sometimes I wish it was just me and her. I waited 30 years to be called mummy and she will be my only child xxxx

**smurfette** · 08-10-2014, 10:33 PM

Originally Posted by Happiness

Hmmm. One of my mindees calls me mummy and is extrimely clingy too. I don't correct him or tell him off ( he is lovely by the way ) but deep down I am a bit upset about it. My daughter who is 27 months old keeps telling him off lol. She says MY MUMMY, ZZZZZ MUMMY. I feel sorry for her sometimes. It breaks my heart. I love my job and my mindees but sometimes I wish it was just me and her. I waited 30 years to be called mummy and she will be my only child xxxx

I had one like this and no matter how many times I corrected her she kept it up! Felt sorry for my little one too.. Her mum didn't mind , she understood I just did mummy things for her when she was at work and she heard my own girls calling me that, but daddy objected when he heard she called dh daddy! Maybe you could just laugh and say 'I'm not mummy I'm x' then he won't feel bad and your daughter will realise
She is special to you?

**smurfette** · 09-10-2014, 07:30 AM

Lol there is a post on Facebook about creepy things parents do.. One of them is call each other mom and dad even when kids aren't there! Someone commented they had to do it in front of kid cos he was calling them by their first names and for about a week he called his mom 'babe' lol!

**VeggieSausage** · 09-10-2014, 08:55 AM

all my children have called me by my name at some point or another and they all call me mum now......don't worry about it, it is your name after all and they hear others call you it, I wasn't a childminder when my eldest 2 did it......