4 year old's conversation me pulling my hair out
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  1. #1
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    Default 4 year old's conversation me pulling my hair out

    I care for a 4 year old girl who has been with me for the past year. Her speech has come on so well she would only say one word sentences when she first came now she can ask questions and talk about things she has done. The thing is she's started just making observations (if you know what I mean) I'll put my coat on and she'll say. "You putting your coat on." or I'll have a drink and she'll say "you having a drink" and this is for everything. "you looking out the window," "You put that in the cupboard." "you eating something" "you sitting down" and on and on it goes all day.... At the beginning I thought she was trying to ask me questions, then I thought I'd just talk to her about what I'm doing, but i'm so worn out i'm fining it hard not to just say "yes" to everything. Any advice on how to stop this would be great. Thanks!

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    I have a 2 year old doing the same at the minute, and have looked after many who have done the same. I try to see it as an important stage in their speech and understanding development rather than just an annoyance (though it is very annoying at times ) If you can, every time she says something like this, try to extend her vocabulary and understanding by explaining a bit more what you're doing, so if she says 'you having a drink', reply 'yes I'm having a drink of water /tea/whatever because I'm feeling thirsty and a drink will make me feel better, are you thirsty, would you like a drink?' I try asking a question like that back and get a conversation going rather than have questions fired at me all day. If I've got to saturation point with it and my voice is giving up, I'll just look at them and smile/nod, as you say, it's not always a question that needs answering, they sometimes just want to know you're listening to them. It's tiring, and at the end of the day after they've all gone sometimes I'd swear I can still hear little voices Trying to move her on to the next stage would probably be a better strategy than trying to stop her, some children just seem to need to go through this stage to progress.

  3. #3
    Simona Guest

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    Quote Originally Posted by squeely wheely View Post
    I care for a 4 year old girl who has been with me for the past year. Her speech has come on so well she would only say one word sentences when she first came now she can ask questions and talk about things she has done. The thing is she's started just making observations (if you know what I mean) I'll put my coat on and she'll say. "You putting your coat on." or I'll have a drink and she'll say "you having a drink" and this is for everything. "you looking out the window," "You put that in the cupboard." "you eating something" "you sitting down" and on and on it goes all day.... At the beginning I thought she was trying to ask me questions, then I thought I'd just talk to her about what I'm doing, but i'm so worn out i'm fining it hard not to just say "yes" to everything. Any advice on how to stop this would be great. Thanks!
    The repetition of the last words you say in a sentence is called 'echolalia'...usually happens around age 2 if not before.

    I have had those kind of questions too...the only way I was able to get the child to extend his thinking was to ask open ended questions to his statements or questions....hope it works for you
    Let us know

    Echolalia..........What It Is and What It Means - teachmetotalk.com

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    Quote Originally Posted by Simona View Post
    The repetition of the last words you say in a sentence is called 'echolalia'...usually happens around age 2 if not before.

    I have had those kind of questions too...the only way I was able to get the child to extend his thinking was to ask open ended questions to his statements or questions....hope it works for you
    Let us know

    Echolalia..........What It Is and What It Means - teachmetotalk.com

    thanks for your advice. Can you give me an example of what you would say to the child then when they say "you sitting down" I know what open questions are I just cant think of an example in this instance. Maybe its the time of night

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    Quote Originally Posted by merry View Post
    I have a 2 year old doing the same at the minute, and have looked after many who have done the same. I try to see it as an important stage in their speech and understanding development rather than just an annoyance (though it is very annoying at times ) If you can, every time she says something like this, try to extend her vocabulary and understanding by explaining a bit more what you're doing, so if she says 'you having a drink', reply 'yes I'm having a drink of water /tea/whatever because I'm feeling thirsty and a drink will make me feel better, are you thirsty, would you like a drink?' I try asking a question like that back and get a conversation going rather than have questions fired at me all day. If I've got to saturation point with it and my voice is giving up, I'll just look at them and smile/nod, as you say, it's not always a question that needs answering, they sometimes just want to know you're listening to them. It's tiring, and at the end of the day after they've all gone sometimes I'd swear I can still hear little voices Trying to move her on to the next stage would probably be a better strategy than trying to stop her, some children just seem to need to go through this stage to progress.
    Very good advice xx

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    Quote Originally Posted by Simona View Post
    The repetition of the last words you say in a sentence is called 'echolalia'...usually happens around age 2 if not before. I have had those kind of questions too...the only way I was able to get the child to extend his thinking was to ask open ended questions to his statements or questions....hope it works for you Let us know Echolalia..........What It Is and What It Means - teachmetotalk.com
    Fabulous link Simona...I had heard this term used before but have never been able to find much info on it.

    Thank you for sharing xx

    Sarah x
    Sarah, Bumble Beez x x

  8. #7
    Simona Guest

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    Quote Originally Posted by squeely wheely View Post
    thanks for your advice. Can you give me an example of what you would say to the child then when they say "you sitting down" I know what open questions are I just cant think of an example in this instance. Maybe its the time of night
    I would say: yes I am sitting down because I want to do such and such....would you like to join me?
    If she says: You are putting your coat on...ask: why do you think I am doing so?
    If she says: You are looking out of the window...say: come here what can you see from my window?

    Start with why? what? what if? what do you think? so she can think and reason and try not to just say YES...I know it can be very tiring due to the repetition
    Echolalia usually disappears at around 4 but I would also record her questions and her answers to yours for comprehension under Communication and Language as in the CoEL

    I think the article gives other reasons why it could go beyond what is normal child and language development...talk to the parents to find out if it happens at home
    Good luck

  9. #8
    toddlers896 Guest

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    My cm friend and I were just having this conversation about kids who keep doing this. We both have a three year old that does the same thing and it's driving us nuts lol.
    My mindee starts from the time she comes in - what are you doing? Where are we going? What are you doing, where are we going, tracy, tracy, tracy, I will answer and she will just keep repeating my name aaaahhhhh. I do answer with open ended questions so she answers the questions for me but it makes no difference.

 

 

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