Struggling with after schoolers.

[TraFerd]

Last week I took on 3 siblings for and hour before school and after school til 5.45pm (although mam has been late collecting every day this week). They go to the same school as my son who is nearly 5 and he seems to enjoy spending time with them, however his behaviour seems to have suddenly worsened and he's lashing out in anger at times if told to some something he doesn't want to do. He has ASD and is probably just reacting to the change in routine but I can't help but feel guilty. I never planned on taking on children after school and although they are lovely children I'm wondering if it's too much for my own children.

Can anyone offer any advice? Will it get easier?

[NinaBowen]

I have found after school children incredibly hard at times. Arguing over the most stupid things. I use a time out with mine and will tell the parents if they have misbehaved. You could give them a month say and if there is no improvement then say sorry you can't have them anymore. Your own children are your priority, it is hard enough for them as it is.

[Stapleton83]

I only had after schoolies when I first started and that was when my eldest DD started in reception and she found it hard. Partly I think because she was already really tired and partly because she was used to having me to herself after school and being able to wind down. However, I would say she really enjoys it most of the time now and my longstanding after schoolie of 2 years and her are great friends and even sit together in class.

It is early days, give it a bit of time before you do anything drastic. Talk to your son about it and try to give him some space of his own, even if that is just to watch some tv on his own etc.


Good luck.

Sam x

[TraFerd]

Thanks to both of you for your advice, I think I'll give it a few more weeks and see if things improve. The children themselves are lovely, it's just there here later than I'd like and I feel like my son can't relax in his own home as it's so busy here. I don't know what I expected when they started, 5.45pm didn't sound that late but when it's getting on for 6pm it just feels too close to bed time. It's good money and I do actually enjoy having them.

My husband and I have decided that we'll trial putting our 18 month old to bed at 7pm and letting our 5 year old stay up with us til 8 - hopefully that'll make him feel special and a bit more grown up.

[happyfeet2013]

My daughter has ASD *****mind preschool and after school

House can be crazy and noise is an issue so I created a wee sofa bed type seat for her to rest with calming relaxing cushions and throws

No childminding kids allowed in
It's her space

Also my daughter struggled with all hrs new children it settled well using her visuals

She loves them loads now

[Louise_Oaktree]

I only have 1 after school at the moment but as a rule will not take any new ones on. I had a run in with 2 parents at the school my son goes to as I had several parents make enquiries around the same time, one had confirmed verbally but never returned the forms or the required deposit so the place was offered to someone else. It made it really uncomfortable for me in the playground so I made the decision not to take on any more from my Son's School.

After school I find goes quite quickly but I find it difficult to entertain the after schoolies when I have parents collecting little ones as they usually finish around 4-5 whereas the after school children are usually later as parents have gone into work after dropping off at school.

I also find the older ones more difficult to keep entertained in the holidays

[TraFerd]

Thanks everyone, I've decided to see how it goes and trial it until Feb half term. I do think it's hard on my son but he does resist change, he was the same when he started school but is fine now.