male child minder...would you use??

**sotam2011** · 11-08-2013, 04:41 AM

Hello I need some advice and would appreciate any feedback from yourselves......
I'm a single dad and have been looking for work but always seem to hit a brick wall when job searching....and this is that childminders don't do the hours that I would require in order to go to work as I come from an industrial background, not office based.

This set me thinking that the most obvious choice is that it would be good to train as a childminder with the intention of going self employed and I could then be a stay at home dad and work as a childminder.
So many people say how good I am with my children and I know myself enough that I would enjoy working with children given the correct training.
I was wondering your thoughts on a Male childminder....would you steer away from putting your children with a male chldminder or would it not bother you in the slightest?
Thank you in advance

**gremlin** · 11-08-2013, 07:09 AM

When I worked full time I used a childminding couple who were husband and wife and my children favoured the man. He was very good and I had no problem with it at all.

I think parents are a lot more open minded these days and I don't think it would be an issue.

Hope this helps.

**Rick** · 11-08-2013, 07:10 AM

Well it's lucky you've bumped into me

I am a male childminder working on his own and I am full at the moment. I used to be a civil engineer, hated it: people being made redundant, wage cuts, more work to do with less people in the office etc etc. Becoming a childminder was the best thing I ever did so I would recommend it.

You may find you are in more demand with there being so few of us

And I must have done something right as I was chosen to be a moderator on this great forum too, so being a male is not a barrier to doing what you want to.

The best way to get business is by getting yourself known in the local community; let people see you with children a d you will be inundated with enquiries!

Have a look at this thread to see the process to becoming a childminder

http://www.childmindinghelp.co.uk/fo...ildminder.html

Good luck

Simona · 11-08-2013, 07:27 AM

Male childminder?????Absolutely so!!!

Children need male models as well as female...
welcome to our community.....be quick in registering and good luck!!

I am interested in your comment that you found 'cms did not work the hours you needed'

can you extend this discussion as it would be interesting to hear from a parent point of view what cms needed to do...or didn't do that suited your needs...what was the problem early start? late finish or overnight care?

As you know Mr Clegg issued a rather worrying statement this week about longer hours ...yes society seems to be a 24/7 affair even when it comes to looking after children...

thank you

**sarah707** · 11-08-2013, 07:34 AM

I work with my partner - he is very well received by all the children and families

**starschildmind** · 11-08-2013, 07:34 AM

Do it do it

The children in my care love my partner when he comes home on his lunch break and the parents love the fact that he helps out on his break. They talk about him abd one little one loves her jason :-D

I have also worked with male nursery nurses and play workers in my career. Children really warm to them and in turn because of this parents have loved them

Childcare used to be a women orientated world but it is changeing so go for it.. you will always wonder what it would have been like unless you go for it :-D

Let us know what you decided ★ xx

**bindy** · 11-08-2013, 07:40 AM

Welcome, yes I would use a male child minder for my daughter, have no problem at all! She does not see her father so for me that would be a big plus, having a male influence. Good luck!

**Gem wright** · 11-08-2013, 07:41 AM

Hello, we are a husband and wife ran team, out of all the families that come to us, we have only had one who were funny about hubby changing nappies. Point blank from the start he wasn't aloud. This did upset him and I did have to challenge their thinking.
But hubby also from a warehouse background, he came home in the evenings and they all flocked to him, got the the point where they knew he came home early on a fri and would be asking for him! He was like royalty when entered the room!
We got busy and it made sense for him to work with me, he really enjoys it but he hasn't registered as a cm just because of the expense, the attending courses then us having two inspections! But he has been volunteering in our local school and has decided it's a school environment he wants to be in, so he's completed his level 2, now starting college to complete his level 3 in supporting schools.

I feel having a male in the setting is just as important as a female. I would go for it, advertise like mad, get yourself out in the community. It will be great to give parents options for their childcare.

Good luck :-)

**Emra81** · 11-08-2013, 07:53 AM

I second everything said so far, especially gremlins post; my dd went to a husband and wife team when I worked full time (hubby was an assistant but working towards becoming a cm) and dd and the hubby absolutely adored each other, it was lovely to see. My dh was working away at the time so I particularly liked that she was getting to spend some time with a male.

**shortstuff** · 11-08-2013, 07:58 AM

There arent enough males in childcare.

I say go for it. I often tell people its the best job in the world and mean it wholeheartedly. There are good times and bad but I love my work.

I would definately send ds to a male childminder if I needed one.

**Samcat** · 11-08-2013, 08:28 AM

Go for it. My husband is registered as my assistant, originally to help out as and when. I've needed his help more and more as I've become busier and the children love him. He's far more outgoing than me and does all the bouncy, energetic and running around things with them that I'd rather not do! I've got a new child starting later this year and when mum came to sign the contract, she said one of the main reasons she chose 'us' over others, was that we worked together. OH is about to do the childminding course and register as a childminder in his own right.

**bunyip** · 11-08-2013, 08:30 AM

Hi Sotam

,

I'm a bloke well into my 2nd year of CMing. To a small degree, that's tempered by the fact that Mrs Bunyip works as my assistant, but that's only for 1-2 hours most days, so parents are essentially having to see me as the main childcare provider and ask themselves the big one: "do I want a male CM?"

On the whole I find it's a positive experience, and some clients will see positive benefits in a man. I'm thinking particularly of one of my clients who is a single mum and who specifically wants a balancing male role model for her child. A lot of parents see it as quite normal, especially if they as a couple share the work at home.

I've no intention of putting you off, but being realistic, there are still quite a few negative/archaic views out there: the recent "Nappygate" thread on ***** being an example that there are still some dinosaurs prowling the fringes of childcare. Sadly, some of the prejudice still continues within the industry. I've found that, whilst being far from the norm, it seems to be dads rather than mums who have a problem with it, plus some women within the circle of childcare/education who still hang onto the reactionary viewpoints.

On several occasions, I've had mums come for a look-round pre-contract visit and go away really happy and positive. Then later they phone back and say something like "I'd love to send my child to you, but my husband/partner is just not having it." I suspect this is the sort of dad who thinks childcare is "women's work" and maybe that's why they send mum out to make the arrangements in the first place, whilst still hanging onto the final 'right' of veto over the decision. This is particularly the case with families visiting from the local military barracks: every visit has followed this pattern of a delighted mum being over-ruled by a Neaderthal squaddie dad. I find the key is to get the dad here asap (preferably from the very first visit) cos dads I've met may have reservations about the idea, but overcome them once they actually meet me.

Interesting that you come from an industrial background. I was on the railways: all muck and shiftwork too. I find that some of the most supportive people are the old regulars at my local: former iron, mill and coal workers who all think what I'm doing is brilliant and are always asking me how it's going.

Do be prepared for the odd childcare "professional" being negative. I had this right from the pre-reg stage. I wandered in on a group of trainees at my pre-reg course who were chatting about how "men are not biologically or emotionally suited to looking after children" (IIRC) and then there was the nursery nursery on my first aid course who, when paired with me for practising the recovery position shrieked, "urghh - he's not touching me!" That's when you need a quick come-back ready; in this case it was something along the lines of: "don't worry love, I have 15 years first aid experience on the railways. I've handled drunks, drug addicts, vagrants and people hit by the hard end of a train - but if you collapsed for real chuck, I'd think twice about saving you."

But my all-time favourite was the woman on a diversity and equality course (of all things) who'd pompously told us about her many years of CM experience in the ice-breaker/introduction session. Yup, she knew it all and was only there to pick up the certificate for her CPD file and grace us with her many years of sound wisdom. Then my turn came and I duly stated who I was, what I did, etc. etc. Mrs. Knowall turned to me - in front of the whole group - and said in gushing patronising tones, "oh, a male CM: how lovely. I expect you're gay, aren't you." To which I replied, "well, only if you're not."

**Supernanny86** · 11-08-2013, 08:31 AM

I agree with everyone else, go for it!

**Chatterbox Childcare** · 11-08-2013, 08:38 AM

My husband became a registered childminder 2 years ago and we get lots of calls because our profile is seen and people want male influences. It is great for children who don't see their dad much or at all.

**bunyip** · 11-08-2013, 08:42 AM

Oops!

I forgot to add my "Go for it."

Well: "Go for it!"

**Mrsh3103** · 11-08-2013, 08:42 AM

DO IT!!!!

3 of my parents are single mums. They love the fact that their children get male contact. All the kids love my husband

**karensmart4** · 11-08-2013, 09:38 AM

I'm not meaning to be negitive here and just want to give my recent experience.

I am a co-ordinator for our local cm's for get-togethers, pass on information, updates etc. (I was volunteered after our LA folded) anyway,

I have a family who's reletives were/are looking for childcare for when the mum returns to work after maternaty leave, but they need a 5.30am start.... I am full plus really don't want to be up at 4.30 each morning so I said that I would send an email to all of the cm's in my 5mile radious.

I had one reply and this was from an almost reg male minder, he attends all of our meetings, he's been on every training course available, he attends every parent/child group (has 2 daughters at home plus one in school), I passed his information on to the family and they never got in touch with him.... all they did was ask me to widen my search... I told them no, it was now down to them.

Sooo you have to be prepared for knock backs and sadly predudice .... don't forget for some they are leaving the most precious thing in their lives with you, they find it difficult and need to be 100% happy with who is going to be caring for that child and we all get knock backs whether we are male or female so Go For It but be realistic in your outlook and expectations

**Rick** · 11-08-2013, 10:00 AM

Originally Posted by karensmart4

I'm not meaning to be negitive here and just want to give my recent experience.

I am a co-ordinator for our local cm's for get-togethers, pass on information, updates etc. (I was volunteered after our LA folded) anyway,

I have a family who's reletives were/are looking for childcare for when the mum returns to work after maternaty leave, but they need a 5.30am start.... I am full plus really don't want to be up at 4.30 each morning so I said that I would send an email to all of the cm's in my 5mile radious.

I had one reply and this was from an almost reg male minder, he attends all of our meetings, he's been on every training course available, he attends every parent/child group (has 2 daughters at home plus one in school), I passed his information on to the family and they never got in touch with him.... all they did was ask me to widen my search... I told them no, it was now down to them.

Sooo you have to be prepared for knock backs and sadly predudice .... don't forget for some they are leaving the most precious thing in their lives with you, they find it difficult and need to be 100% happy with who is going to be caring for that child and we all get knock backs whether we are male or female so Go For It but be realistic in your outlook and expectations

It's not all bad though!

I've had 6 parent viewings since I started last October and 5 of them have signed up. The only one who didn't went with someone down the road from her. Also 5 of the 6 children I have are girls when you might expect parents to prefer to send sons rather than daughters. Maybe I just live in a very open minded town!

He's doing all the right things; I hope he is also getting himself to toddler groups and getting himself known in the community because that is my main source of enquiries. People would rather send their children to someone they know than someone they don't, even if that person is a male childminder who might not have been in their mind from the outset.

I know someday I will come across prejudice in some form but because I'm pretty certain of that fact, it won't shock me. I know I'm worth more than that attitude and will shrug it off and find someone else who does appreciate me because I know I do a good job!

Anyway, don't be put off by anything. It is how you come across that people will judge you on, as they would a female minder. As a single dad you are likely to come across well as you (presumably) look after your children well.

Why not contact your LA, go to the briefing session and then make a decision.

Good luck

**bunyip** · 11-08-2013, 10:17 AM

Originally Posted by karensmart4

I'm not meaning to be negitive here and just want to give my recent experience.

I am a co-ordinator for our local cm's for get-togethers, pass on information, updates etc. (I was volunteered after our LA folded) anyway,

I have a family who's reletives were/are looking for childcare for when the mum returns to work after maternaty leave, but they need a 5.30am start.... I am full plus really don't want to be up at 4.30 each morning so I said that I would send an email to all of the cm's in my 5mile radious.

I had one reply and this was from an almost reg male minder, he attends all of our meetings, he's been on every training course available, he attends every parent/child group (has 2 daughters at home plus one in school), I passed his information on to the family and they never got in touch with him.... all they did was ask me to widen my search... I told them no, it was now down to them.

Sooo you have to be prepared for knock backs and sadly predudice .... don't forget for some they are leaving the most precious thing in their lives with you, they find it difficult and need to be 100% happy with who is going to be caring for that child and we all get knock backs whether we are male or female so Go For It but be realistic in your outlook and expectations

A sad story, but good for you for not pandering to their prejudices, and telling them to search for themselves if they wouldn't see a male CM.

I certainly do understand the argument that we are responsible for the most precious thing in a parents' life, but that is no excuse for prejudice. It is totally irrational to judge someone (who, let us remember, has already been accepted as a "suitable person" by Ofsted) without meeting or knowing anything about them. This is no better than the bad old days when parents "had concerns" about black/brown/yellow/other-skinned nurses working on children's wards in hospitals.

**Ripeberry** · 11-08-2013, 10:29 AM

Go for it! There are prejudices wherever you go. You just need to be a bit like Bunyip and charm them. When I did my training back in the summer of 2008, I was one of the older people on my course and some of the young people looked me up and down as if to say 'What are you doing here?' Just believe in yourself, let yourself be seen with the children at local groups and the rest will follow.