Just beginning and getting annoyed at remarks already!!

[Samijanec]

Sounds like a typical MIL to me.
Try not to let comments bother you because whilst you are happy and enjoying what you do. All those with "proper" jobs are working away hating their daily commute/ working day/ colleagues and so on!!!

[jackie 7]

I have a sister who tells her friends I am a babysitter. This is not new as she did the same when I was a nanny. I gave up trying to tell her what I did as all she says is in Germany there is more paperwork! I can ignore that as her other comments about are terrible so I do my best to ignore everything she says.

[TooEarlyForGin?]

MIL's seem to be particularly good at this, where my own mum admires what I do, my mum in law just hasn't understood over the last 10 years why I can't just "pop" her grandchildren around (1 and a half hour round trip) and has made many comments such as " we'll at least you get to do the ironing and housework done, working parents don't get the chance", because I am obviously not working... and my house doesn't get trashed daily.

[KarenM]

I had to walk away from a parent at a birthday party yesterday because of her comments. I've looked after her child since they were 6 months old and they are now 3. I raised concerns about some aspects of their development, that was also raised by the H.V. and lo and behold within a couple of weeks they were booked into a private nursery. Then the comments started as to how it will be so hard leaving them at a proper educational establishment and it was different with me cause it was like leaving them with another Mum for a few hours break. But it's ok because at this private school they will be getting half an hour 1 to 1 with a qualified teacher! Doesn't matter that I also have my degree and 12 years of qualifications and experience and will be starting the EYTS in September. What got to me most was the parent is a teaching assistant at a primary school with reception - oh hang on they follow the EYFS too don't they lol

[amylouise867]

Sounds like a typical MIL to me.
Try not to let comments bother you because whilst you are happy and enjoying what you do. All those with "proper" jobs are working away hating their daily commute/ working day/ colleagues and so on!!!

This is so true!!!!!

[amylouise867]

I'm obviously not alone.....think you are all right though.... As long as you're happy that's all that matters....

People will always make remarks regardless of what your doing!

My MIL constantly says things that really irritate me beyond belief. She isn't a very likeable person & seems to have grief where ever she goes as she has a right mouth, but I make a big effort with her for my other half.

The other week I said to my other half.... "did you load the dish washer?"
Mil "he works while your off on maternity that is a house work duty that falls to you"
Me "it's not a duty that falls to me at all, we work as a partnership in my house & if I want a little contribution here & there I will ask for it."
Mil "well that's bad he doesn't get any me time"
Me "well neither do I.... So his help here & there is great"
Mil "well I'm old fashioned I did everything and I had 3 kids - you've only got one'

Honestly I just can't believe how nasty she can be!!!

May I add she is currently suspended from work for her mouth & making other staff feel very uncomfortable & talking down to them.

It's not just me she's like it with everyone....

She's the sort that has done things 10 times better than anyone else, she's had things worse than you blah blah blah....

Joys of the inlaws ay? Makes it worse as my family as so wonderful - you notice it more! x

[smiler]

---

when people say these things to me I just say 'yep, clever me, I stay at home raising my own children and get paid more than you do! Bet you wish you'll chosen uour career more carefully! ' that soon puts things right haha!

My own dad who I love to bits, always refers to my childminding as'a convenient stop gap' how funny! He doesn't realise I've no intention of giving up a job I enjoy anytime soon. Brush it off, you'll hear it again x x

[Twinkling Stars]

I had a few comments yesterday at a playgroup. One parent said you have five children today! I said yes they are all really good! They were playing nicely together. I looked over her shoulder at her one child who was hitting, taking toys and screaming at other children! :-\

[donna porter]

Welcome to the world of people and their ridiculous comments. I've had all sorts - one lady, who was a friend of mine said to me one day 'it must be lovely to be able to stay at home all day with your son and get paid to play all day with a few others'. Yep, cos that's all I do!! Some people just don't think, and likewise I think just don't understand what we do. Luckily, there's just as many people tell me I need a medal as tell me I need to get a 'proper job'.

Xxx

Too true!!!! Some people thing we are superwoman and some think we're just doing it till we get a 'proper' job! Rrrrrgh!!!!
I got asked once if I'm still babysitting!!!!!!

[donna porter]

I love the looks I get when I'm out with 4 or 5 different ages / hair colours / clearly different families! I find it hilarious

Lol I get funny looks too. I always get told that my minded children are 'my double' but nevertheless own children! So funny!

[FloraDora]

I am a recently retired headteacher who is preparing to become a childminder as I miss the daily interaction with children ( I was an EY specialist and always had a nursery attached to my schools) plus would like a little extra cash for nice holidays!

Most people that know me say that it is a great idea and what a great childminder I would make, but I have had loads of comments about 'downgrading' !! I point out that I have had to put in place similar paperwork as running a primary school and that OFSTED will visit me the same as when I was a HT.
For those ignorant of the process and expectations these discussions just wash over them as they snort condemnation using words like 'embarrased' 'come down' and 'do you really need the money that much" !!!
It is very frustrating and once I am established I will be doing my utmost to ensure childminders are treated with the same equality as others in childcare/ education.

I am really looking forward to being a childminder and joining your community.

[amylouise867]

I am a recently retired headteacher who is preparing to become a childminder as I miss the daily interaction with children ( I was an EY specialist and always had a nursery attached to my schools) plus would like a little extra cash for nice holidays!

Most people that know me say that it is a great idea and what a great childminder I would make, but I have had loads of comments about 'downgrading' !! I point out that I have had to put in place similar paperwork as running a primary school and that OFSTED will visit me the same as when I was a HT.
For those ignorant of the process and expectations these discussions just wash over them as they snort condemnation using words like 'embarrased' 'come down' and 'do you really need the money that much" !!!
It is very frustrating and once I am established I will be doing my utmost to ensure childminders are treated with the same equality as others in childcare/ education.

I am really looking forward to being a childminder and joining your community.

Aw that's lovely!

I can see from your background, knowledge, experience & expertise that you will become a great childminder

How far are you into the process??

From all the replies it's evident there are many ignorant & jealous people out there.

It's all about rising above! Too true xxx

[littlemiss60561]

Annoying huh, but try not to let it get to you. Just start thinking of some helpful replies. There are supportive people out there!!
i was at a group today and an older lady there helping was talking to me about childminding and what a difficult but rewarding job it must be. She said she had been listening to a program on radio 4 the other day ( yesterday?..Sounded interesting) and said people were complaining about the cost of childcare etc. she asked if I minded telling her if I earned a nice wage ( she was being nice l) so I said minimum wage .less if I add in All the Extra hours. And she was so cross and said she thought so. She said she was desperate to call in and shout at the people complaining and how can they dare only pay 4.00 per hour for such wonderful homely care! but she didn't know if her facts were right. I said its possible to earn a very nice income if your full on numbers all the time/ no children of your own in ratios etc, but that didn't stop her comparing how much some people pay their gardener to what I charge for such care of our precious people. It was lovely to have a conversation with someone not in the loop , but on our side!

[Kerry30]

I worked as a nanny for years and then went into childminding and a friend (also a nanny) thought i was downgrading myself. I just ignored her comments. I much prefer being my own boss. Ironically shes a childminder now!!

[mandy moo]

I love the looks I get when I'm out with 4 or 5 different ages / hair colours / clearly different families! I find it hilarious

I had this a few years back I had a little chap (4) whos parents were of indian origin, another little lad the same age whos grandparents are from Caribbean, siblings Girl & boy (8 & 6) both brown haired, and a very blond 5yr old girl. the looks I used to get..lol