14 yr old sib collecting 2 yr old?

**Starfish007** · 04-09-2012, 12:44 PM

Hi, parent has asked me if her very mature 14 year old daughter can pick up her 2 1/2 year old son after her daughter finishes school at 4pm ish. Its not far to their house but they will have to cross over a main road with a pedestrian crossing. Could I have your thoughts please? Should I put a policy in place? x

**CharB** · 04-09-2012, 12:52 PM

I would just get her permission in writing if your worried.
Charlotte

**cathtee** · 04-09-2012, 01:07 PM

Sorry, in my opinion 14 is not old enough. I'm sure my local school will not allow that age to pick up from school for children aged 5/6.

I wouldn't be happy at being asked, there is apparently no legal reason for a 14 yr old not to look after sibling so not sure if we could refuse.

**EmmaReed84** · 04-09-2012, 01:19 PM

It is so hard to say without knowing both the children.

Sounds bad but I would not have my 15 yr old SIL collect my 6 yr old son because I don't think she is mature enough and my son can he a handful.

However I would have my 14 yr old cousin collect my 3 yr old son because cousin is very mature for his age and 3 yr old son is very well behaved and walks instead of running.

I think this is very much down to parents and your own feelings on the matter, if you don't like the idea, then express your concerns, if parent still says they want daughter to collect get them to sign a doc to say you can raised concerns but they still want her to collect.

**mushpea** · 04-09-2012, 02:01 PM

I once had a 15yrold collect a 2yrold from me, I did a very specific policy just for mum and part of it was that once the child was collected from me I would no longer be responsible for them. I cant say I was particuarly happy that somone of that age was collecting a child but at the end of the day it was mums choice plus 15yrold picked up over an hour earlier which saved mum money but it back fired as after one pick up the next time the 15yrold let mum down and I had already made arrangments to go out that afternoon so mum was stuck with no childcare and had to finish work early, she was not best pleased. the most annoying thing was mum just assumed I would have child and the text read, xx wont be able to collect xx today so will see you at ususal time, I text her back and had to point out the ususal time was now an hour earlier as she had changed contracts to save herself money!

Pipsqueak · 04-09-2012, 02:16 PM

technically there is no law that states a child of this age cannot collect a younger sibling, if the parent so wishes
would you be so reserved if the 14yr old was the childs parent? ...... there are many young teen parents out there with young children themselves.... I have had dealings with 14yr olds with 3/4yr old children themselves.....

I would do a specific policy and permission form, using guidance from the NSPCC (re leaving another child to care for siblings for example and how the parent is still ultimately responsible and blah) and your insurers (ie once the child has left your care you are no longer responsbile for them)

**caz3007** · 04-09-2012, 02:43 PM

I had a 14 year old collect a 5 year old. She was a very responsible young girl and looked after her sibling at the weekends too when mum had to work.

Mum signed to say that as soon as they left my home, then they were no longer my responsibility.

**gegele** · 04-09-2012, 02:49 PM

i suppose it depends on children. when i was 12 i used to pick up my 6yrs olds brother and babysit some evening....

hard one

**Jods** · 04-09-2012, 03:32 PM

When I worked in Pre-school we had very strict collection policies, and no one under 18 was allowed to collect child - however when a 17 year old mum and her daughter started - lets just say the harridens had to rethink.

It is down to the parent, but I suppose you have to be comfortable with it also, as all have mentioned set it up watertight and see how it goes for a trial period, you might find its not that bad (I used to have to look after my idiot/irritating brother pft.......................)

**Bridey** · 04-09-2012, 06:20 PM

I was 14 when I was first left in sole charge of my brother ... He was 8 weeks old!

I now babysit HIS babies!

**kellib** · 04-09-2012, 06:32 PM

I wouldn't have a problem with it, if the parents trust the 14 year old then I don't see why I would challenge it.

When I was 15 I used to pick my wee cousin from nursery on Fridays, she was 4 and I'd usually take my youngest cousin with me, he was 2 so I was responsible for 2 under 5's. I have to say I loved that time as it was special time for just us 3 and we had a great time together. Must have loved them dearly as I gave up my Friday afternoons after high school for them

On the other hand I have a 20 year old cousin who even now I wouldn't leave with my 7 year old as I just don't trust her! So it just shows that age doesn't really matter, it's how responsible and trustworthy they are

**Starfish007** · 04-09-2012, 06:34 PM

Thank you so much for your quick responses, very helpful as always. Off to write new policy x

**zippy** · 04-09-2012, 07:12 PM

Does anyone know what the law actually says, I've been asked if 9 year old and 7 year old can leave unaccompanied I've always said no but not sure where I stand with law as they leave school
Unaccompanied when not with me.

Pipsqueak · 04-09-2012, 07:25 PM

Originally Posted by zippy

Does anyone know what the law actually says, I've been asked if 9 year old and 7 year old can leave unaccompanied I've always said no but not sure where I stand with law as they leave school
Unaccompanied when not with me.

again there is no specifc laws about children being unaccompanied etc. check the NSPCC website

However, in this circumstance I would be telling the parent that this is NOT something I would feel comfortable with and therefore disinclined to allow it.
I would also check with Ofsted - get their view and also your insurers. I am guessing they are saying that if the parent gives their permission - you get that in writing, write a policy and blah blah and once they leave your care/premises then they are no longer your responsibility. however like I say, its not something I would be comfortable doing

**tammys-tots** · 05-09-2012, 12:38 PM

Originally Posted by Starfish007

Hi, parent has asked me if her very mature 14 year old daughter can pick up her 2 1/2 year old son after her daughter finishes school at 4pm ish. Its not far to their house but they will have to cross over a main road with a pedestrian crossing. Could I have your thoughts please? Should I put a policy in place? x

i had this last year, i rang ofsted to check they said as long as i feel the young person is suitable to look after the child and i have permission from the parents, like she said they can have a baby at that age and you wouldnt say they cant collect their child!