In a parent pickle. Need advice.

[ziggy]

oh dear i am very confused. Seems sad to have so much hassle over £10

Thankfully i have never had a problem with payments so all mine pay in arrears at the end of the week/month.

Not sure my non mathematical brain could cope anyway

Good luck anyway hope you get it sorted out

[sophia36]

if you really dont want to lose the girls ( and income) then maybe you could find a way to back down without admiting you are wrong ( not that you are!)

How about ringing her and saying that obviously you two are not going to agree over whether the £10 id due or not , but regardless that you feel that you should both put the girls first - and that you wouldnt see them having to settle elsewhere when they are clearly so happy with you for a measly £10. You get the moral high ground that way. tell her that from january payments run monday to monday - and itemise each day on your invoices so she cant object / nitpick.

Then put up your prices soon so you get back the £10 that way!

I think you need to sort this before xmas as it could ruin it for you. I think i would probably back down about the £10 but in a quiet way (probably keep quiet!) Then i would do 2 things
* give a months notice that i itend to put my prices up ( even just 25p an hour quickly adds up!) from beginning of february. You could soften the blow by saying you have chosen february to increase fees as you apprecite everyone is strapped for cash after christmas
* keep working for her but be open to new enquiries. If you recieve an enquiry that suits you and you feel may be a better option take it! This way you won't lose any money> It will be awkward giving her notice but so much better in the long run for you. This woman sounds a nightmare!

I have been childminding for 6 years and it's only very recently that i've started standing up for myself a bit more. In fact just last week i was very brave indeed. I work for a very arrogant dad who regularly takes my breath away with his rudeness. I meet him after school to drop his son off to him> he lives 100yards from the school. I normally take him to his house but there was no answer when i arrived. i turned my car around and drove back to the school, i saw him coming out of the school gates so i got his son out of my car and walked over to him. He said 'erm ------ doesn't like the wind could you drive him to my house?' I smiled very sweetly and said ' doesn't he? he was fine in the park earlier, lets pull his hood up and he'll be fine.' His dad was very pleasant as he knew he had no argument.
No way was i going to turn my car around again and drive 100 yards up the road!! I felt really good about standing up for myself, it really helped my self esteem. Normally i keep quiet and feel humiliated.

[littlegremlins]

Sounds like a Monday to Monday arrangement would be easier for all so could you take 4 days' money one Tuesday to take her up to Friday and from thereon you will be paid each Monday?

[Childminder8608]

I see now that the tuesday to tuesday thing could be confusing, but it was just set up that way with no problems, and it's not really confusing to me, it's not that complicated past splitting days into which payment month they fall into.

I actually could have just gave her her own way straight off, and another parent I might have, but she brought this up whilst not getting own way regarding holiday stuff. It was her taking a huff basically. And I'm sick of her trying to dictate to me.

She wanted a live in nanny/au pair and only never because she is really tight, but she still expects me to act as she is my sole employer. That's why I'm not really for just giving into her all the time.

Like I say though, her kids are a breeze and its a perfect arrangement for me otherwise. I'd like to have it resolved but dont know how to get in contact to enquire again, as my letter went totally ignored, and it said I would give them to the 23rd.

I'm missing my sons play at nursery on Monday as I have to pick them up and its a pain because I know by the end of the week they plan to just drop me in it. I'm tempted to pull a sicky and see my son instead.

[Bushpig]

Pull a sicky, and give her notice. This is YOUR business, she is not your boss, do not be bullied by her. Your son comes before her or her kids.

[Newbie1!]

Listen to what Pip says - shes usually right!!

Personally (I say this on here but Id prob chicken out!!) would say to her on the 22nd that unless she is bringing the outstanding money with her on the 23rd then you will not be providing care on that day as it hasnt been paid for.

That is if I understand right what you are saying xx

[Pipsqueak]

I see now that the tuesday to tuesday thing could be confusing, but it was just set up that way with no problems, and it's not really confusing to me, it's not that complicated past splitting days into which payment month they fall into.

I actually could have just gave her her own way straight off, and another parent I might have, but she brought this up whilst not getting own way regarding holiday stuff. It was her taking a huff basically. And I'm sick of her trying to dictate to me.

She wanted a live in nanny/au pair and only never because she is really tight, but she still expects me to act as she is my sole employer. That's why I'm not really for just giving into her all the time.

Like I say though, her kids are a breeze and its a perfect arrangement for me otherwise. I'd like to have it resolved but dont know how to get in contact to enquire again, as my letter went totally ignored, and it said I would give them to the 23rd.

I'm missing my sons play at nursery on Monday as I have to pick them up and its a pain because I know by the end of the week they plan to just drop me in it. I'm tempted to pull a sicky and see my son instead.

Two things here:

you don;t have an employer at all. PERIOD you are self employed


and as to missing own sons play - NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO do NOT do that, your son needs you and you need to be there.....Pull a sicky

[miffy]

I'm missing my sons play at nursery on Monday as I have to pick them up and its a pain because I know by the end of the week they plan to just drop me in it. I'm tempted to pull a sicky and see my son instead.

There is no way I'd miss seeing my child's performance and especially under these circumstances.

Miffy xx

[Goatgirl]

Listen to what Pip says - shes usually right!!

Personally (I say this on here but Id prob chicken out!!) would say to her on the 22nd that unless she is bringing the outstanding money with her on the 23rd then you will not be providing care on that day as it hasnt been paid for.

That is if I understand right what you are saying xx

Agreed

btw, what is the actal wording for non - payment termination on the contract........?

best wishes,
Wendy

[Childminder8608]

I'm thinking I have now 2 options

- send a letter on Weds saying that if the girls are coming on Friday then the payment needs to be sent with them.

- hand out notice before it comes to the day this £10.50 is due (friday 23rd). I'll tell you why...

The wording says "Payment must be made on the Friday, if not then the last possible day I will accept is the following Monday. If the debt isn't paid then and the child is brought then or after, I will not take them until the debt is paid. If the debt remains unpaid then the contract is no longer valid and I require no notice to terminate the contract."

So basically, if it gets to after the 23rd and she doesnt pay then "the contract is no longer valid". Whereas if I give her notice BEFORE, then she is liable to pay for the 4 weeks notice. If this isn't paid then it will go to small claims court.

I HOPE!! I hope my wording doesnt' mean they can just get away with it even if it is with 4 weeks notice.

I would be more than happy to not work on Monday if I *knew* that she wasn't going to pay the money/return. But if she was going to, then I dont want to rock the boat more as we are on our last legs and I would be willing to still work together if this was sorted. Am I a walkover? Should I be telling her to do one regardless now?

Would you contact her to find out what her intentions are first? Give her her notice now? HELP!! I'm going to phone SCMA asap tomorrow.

[Pipsqueak]

I'm thinking I have now 2 options

- send a letter on Weds saying that if the girls are coming on Friday then the payment needs to be sent with them.

- hand out notice before it comes to the day this £10.50 is due (friday 23rd). I'll tell you why...

The wording says "Payment must be made on the Friday, if not then the last possible day I will accept is the following Monday. If the debt isn't paid then and the child is brought then or after, I will not take them until the debt is paid. If the debt remains unpaid then the contract is no longer valid and I require no notice to terminate the contract."

So basically, if it gets to after the 23rd and she doesnt pay then "the contract is no longer valid". Whereas if I give her notice BEFORE, then she is liable to pay for the 4 weeks notice. If this isn't paid then it will go to small claims court.

I HOPE!! I hope my wording doesnt' mean they can just get away with it even if it is with 4 weeks notice.

I would be more than happy to not work on Monday if I *knew* that she wasn't going to pay the money/return. But if she was going to, then I dont want to rock the boat more as we are on our last legs and I would be willing to still work together if this was sorted. Am I a walkover? Should I be telling her to do one regardless now?

Would you contact her to find out what her intentions are first? Give her her notice now? HELP!! I'm going to phone SCMA asap tomorrow.

i would contact her saying that you expect payment by Friday (but have in mind that Monday WILL be the LAST days leeway - and if its not forthcoming by Friday close of business then have the termination letter ready to hand over at the close of business. If she gives the money to you on Monday then you could consider retracting ... consider.....

[Childminder8608]

So just give the girls' stepdad a letter at close of business saying

"the £10.50 wasn't paid so I will let it slide and no longer wish for you to pay it. But here is your 4 weeks notice, you are liable for payment"

Something along those lines? Good plan

I still need to phone SCMA and check that the wording of my contract doesn't allow them to get away with the 4 weeks notice too with the sentence "If payment is not made by the following monday the contract is no longer valid". Durrr, kicking myself about this one now! I made these before I started, going to have a good edit of all my policies after this!!!

I really appreciate all your help ladies, I know its brain torture trying to figure this stuff out

[Childminder8608]

Or do I take Monday off as a sick day, so that they are no longer due me payment? Then give them their notice before they leave?

[miffy]

I wouldn't say anything about the £10.50 not being paid and you no longer wishing it to be paid, if you are going to give notice then just do that.

Do check with your insurer's first about the wording on the contract and get their advice. I think the parents will realise what you are doing in giving notice and I would not expect them to pay - if you don't think they will pay you £10.50 then they are very unlikely to give you 4 weeks notice money. It could turn into a very bitter battle and cause you a lot more hassle (I'm not saying you are wrong just to be prepared).

Good luck

Miffy xx

[Childminder8608]

I just think if I say I dont want the £10 then they can't' use that to get out of the 4 weeks by using the "if you dont pay by monday" thing. Whereas they have signed saying they commit to 4 weeks notice if ever they leave.

Hurry up and open, SCMA lol.

[Goatgirl]

Hi,
Unfortunately I think the wording has given them an easy get out clause. Change it for everyone if it on other contracts asap

The only way I can see to head off the situation is to give notice before the time limit.... Unless you can sweetly say you don't agree with them about the outstanding money but are willing to write it off on this occasion for the sake of your working relationship.
Put it in writing, hand it over in person and if things don't improve give notice at the first opportunity!

Or....

I would tell them today that you are disappointed that they are disputing a £10.50 payment which is clearly due. This dispute has caused you to consider your options and you have taken advice from your insurers. (which you will have by pick up tonight).
If they pay the overdue amount by tomorrow morning nothing more will be said and your contract remains in place. If the overdue monies are not recieved then you feel you have no choice but to issue 4 weeks notice of termination of contract, from tomorrow's date.
Have a letter ready to hand over today with all the above in writing and make sure you hand it to them. Keep a copy.

Also have your notice letter ready if you are sure they'll turn up to accept it tomorrow, or send it anyway/put it through their door with the wording allowing that if the £10.50 has been paid as asked, then the notice does not stand and the contractual terms remain the same as on the contract. In this letter cite all fees that would be due and when and name the last day of care.
Then remind them that in the circumstances you will not be able to accept the children for care unless all monies are paid in full and on time, but fees will remain payable for the entire notice period.

Obviously check out what you're going to write with your insurers etc, to get the wording right

Really hope they just pay up and you can put it behind you, or at least that they pay the 4 weeks notice without a fight.....

Once its sorted either way, (actually, before, for all other parents,) I'd send a letter out to all parents explaining that the contract wording for non payment no longer stands The new wording is ".... ......" and this overrules/replaces the former policy/ contract wording.


Obvously feel free to ignore all the above. Your business, your decisions

Best wishes,
Wendy