Getting worked up over what to charge

[francinejayne]

*****mind for my friend (I know!!), and everything so far has gone great - the children have been with me since August.

Our contract states she should pay me full fees for their holiday, and no charge for my holiday. I am working all over Christmas as I have no holidays left

Based on our contract she owes me £400 for December. She has not yet paid me (I am not concerned about this, I know I will get the money) and on Friday she said "I've not sent the money through yet as P (her hubbie) hasn't had his holidays confirmed from work yet, so we can work the money out once he's had his hols confirmed"

I did say on Friday that it doesn't matter about his holiday confirmation as I am working Christmas anyway, but I don't think she realised what I meant.

Then today she has been telling me how skint they are, and again she mentioned that P has put his hols in and is hopefully off from 15th December, but she will confirm once she knows for sure.

Based on me not having the children from 15th December, if she only paid for when I looked after the children she would only owe me £152!!

I want to charge her the full £400, and I know if she wasn't my friend I wouldn't even be worrying about this. My hubbie says she is wrong to be telling me how skint she is and making me feel bad.

What should I do? If I do charge the £400 how do I explain it to her? We normally do our correspondence re fees by email.

Thanks!

[jane5]

This is an awkward one

You either tell her clearly so there is no misunderstanding, I am working over christmas because I can not afford to have the time off, or you could give her a reduction in fees as a goodwill gesture maybe 50% off.

I mind for family and I have to be clear about fees so there is misunderstanding which can lead to resentment.

Good luck

[curlycathy]

Do you issue invoices? Mine used to look a bit like this (doing it from memory!)

INVOICE FOR XXX DECEMBER 2011

Hours of attendance:
Monday x - x (total hours) = £xx (£x/per hour)
Tuesday x-x (total hours) =£xx

Days for December
(List all days and cost)

Total due: £xxx

Please note full fees apply for parent/child holiday or sickness. No fees for my holidays.

I also had a line along the bottom about late fees being charged too! Seriously you need to sort this out - if it was anybody else you wouldnt hesitate. Email her and remind her she needs to pay. Its all very well her going on about being skint but what about you???? I hope you get this sorted out x

[Loushah]

I have only just become registered and my sister and sister in law both have young girls. They both asked if I would look after their children at reduced rates as they haven't got much money...it was awkward saying no to them but I made it clear that as much as I would love to give them a discount, I have my own bills myself to pay and just couldn't afford to do that. They both understood and have instead asked grandparents to look after the children.

If it was me I would sit down or talk to her on the phone when the children are not around so you both can focus on the conversation and just talk to her openly and honestly...I know it's hard but you will feel so much better for doing it.

Good luck hun

[Pipsqueak]

What do you mean you have no holidays left? You are S/E and can take time of whenever you want!

As to the invoice I would be saying that this one is overdue and that the next one will be due at this rate.

If she is THAT skint - as we all get at Xmas then perhaps you can offer her to pay in two installments perhaps but I would get it out in the open and sorted asap so you don't spend Xmas worrying!

[The Juggler]

Ring her urgently and explain it does not matter what time off her DH has, that when you are open full fees are normally payable. Personally for the sake of the friendship THIS TIME ONLY i'd make a tiny compromise for her hon. tell her you are closed between xmas and new year but you are open until 24 and reopen on 3rd and maybe let her off the inbetween payments. Tell her this is one off only offer as she's a special friend.

[JMcG]

I agree that you should give her the benefit of the doubt and assume that maybe this is just a misunderstanding of how fees work. I've used 3 childminders over the year and each one worked so differently that I had a huge misunderstanding with my last childminder and she took is so personally - thinking that I was trying to say she was overcahrging me. It wasn't like that at all. She didnt use invoices to explain what I owed and I found this difficult. We got there in the end but it was very uncomfortable.

My advice would be to always issue invoices for the upcoming month that clearly shows exactly what you are charging and then there's little room for misunderstandings.

So with your friend I think I'd write up a note stating when you are open/closed over the cristmas period and appologise that you did not give it to her at the begining of the month. Then maybe say that as a friend you will give her a slight discount for the days that her husband is going to be on holiday and tell her that technically you are still working those days. If she does want to use any of these 'discounted' days then you will charge the full amount.

If you can afford it also maybe say for this month that you will allow her to pay an installment now and the rest with next months fees.

Then make sure you always use an invoice in the future. Good luck lovely!