Meals

[Merlot]

Do you provide meals?

I offer breakfast and snacks (morning and afternoon) for little ones and charge extra for lunch and tea meals. I do over 30 meals per week cooking for 4-6 children per night and always have 3 at lunchtime. I find I am wasting more food than I give the children. Most of my children have been with me for a long time and have become increasingly fussy and it's a total pain. I've spoken to all the parents asking for them to tell me what their children would eat at home with the family and what they will prepare them for lunch and tea. I've asked for likes and dislikes and even though I still do meals that children like, they still refuse to eat. It wouldn't matter if I make stews, casseroles, pies, pasta, sausages etc, someone would always moan. The only success have with everyone is fishfingers and chips. Kids don't even like pizza or chicken nuggets that much. I prepare healthy, home cooked meals with fresh ingredients and it completely grieves me to throw it in the bin. I was in tears a few weeks back as I had a real drama with one of the older children which I've never had before.

I'm considering offering toast and fruit as a snack after school then parents feed their kids when they go home. I have made suggestions to some parents already and they are dreading the fact they will have to make packed lunches for their kids.

I'm at the end of my tether. I think I know my answer but would like to know what other childminders do and what you would do in my situation.

[singingcactus]

The best I can offer you is (and I'm sure you already do this anyway) try planning your meals so that leftovers will make up part of tomorrows snack or meal. Only dish up very small servings each time, then allow 2nds and 3rds as appropriate. That way at least the leftover food is actually clean leftover food and not plate scrapings. Then just incorporate it into tomorrows, or the day afters meals.

I'm not suggesting this is true of you, but I often feel that kids are given such large portions that they lose the will to eat as soon as they see the plate. I know in restaraunts I can go in hungry, be given an enormous plate and be overwhelmed and lose my appetite (and I have a healthy appetite....too healthy lol).

If you're in the habit of providing good, healthy whole foods for meals, you will find yourself very upset at times at some offerings send in if you go for pack ups . Think about it for a while longer.

[loocyloo]

The best I can offer you is (and I'm sure you already do this anyway) try planning your meals so that leftovers will make up part of tomorrows snack or meal. Only dish up very small servings each time, then allow 2nds and 3rds as appropriate. That way at least the leftover food is actually clean leftover food and not plate scrapings. Then just incorporate it into tomorrows, or the day afters meals.

I'm not suggesting this is true of you, but I often feel that kids are given such large portions that they lose the will to eat as soon as they see the plate. I know in restaraunts I can go in hungry, be given an enormous plate and be overwhelmed and lose my appetite (and I have a healthy appetite....too healthy lol).

If you're in the habit of providing good, healthy whole foods for meals, you will find yourself very upset at times at some offerings send in if you go for pack ups . Think about it for a while longer.

Double post!

[loocyloo]

The best I can offer you is (and I'm sure you already do this anyway) try planning your meals so that leftovers will make up part of tomorrows snack or meal. Only dish up very small servings each time, then allow 2nds and 3rds as appropriate. That way at least the leftover food is actually clean leftover food and not plate scrapings. Then just incorporate it into tomorrows, or the day afters meals.

I'm not suggesting this is true of you, but I often feel that kids are given such large portions that they lose the will to eat as soon as they see the plate. I know in restaraunts I can go in hungry, be given an enormous plate and be overwhelmed and lose my appetite (and I have a healthy appetite....too healthy lol).

If you're in the habit of providing good, healthy whole foods for meals, you will find yourself very upset at times at some offerings send in if you go for pack ups . Think about it for a while longer.

:-) good idea.
I only give small portions and then give more if needed. ( I can't face a multitude of pack ups and fuss over who has what - easier to give them all the same )
I also have taught myself not to stress if they don't eat ... a)they won't starve b)I haven't wasted much and c)parents have paid for it! (I include all food in my hourly rate, but my rate reflects this)

I made chilli & rice for tea on Monday, (froze chilli leftovers to have in burritos/tacos another week)
Then made bolognese for tea on tuesday, using left over passata from the chilli.
Wednesday lunch was left over pasta with pesto/salad. tea only had 1 mindee and she requested fish gougons and veggies! (Easy to cook portion control)
Lunch today was veg soup, to which I added some of the bolognese. ('Beef and veg' soup) (Rest of bolognese was frozen)
Tea was sausages and mash... left over mash frozen for fish pie next week. If there are any sausages left after dh gets home ( ! ) we'll have them in an omelette for lunch tomorrow.
Am roasting a chicken for tea tomorrow night, along with veg and roast potatoes.

We'll probably have most the left over chicken in a risotto on sat and I'll make a chicken stock with the bones and either make chicken soup (using last bits of chicken) or freeze it ready for a casserole.

I spend about £30/35 a week on mindees food ... That's 8-10 teas and 14 lunches a week, plus snacks. I shop at asda/lidl/local market. I make my own bread and yogurt.

[FloraDora]

I spend just as much time planning meals as I do planning activities sometimes!
I only provide lunch and snacks ( I think parents should cook sometimes for their children/ eat as a family etc...)
Our current, seems to work system, is to provide something in each lunch that someone likes - so salad means lots of different things depending on children, from just apple to a full blown mix with dressing - they usually in a week have perhaps two things on their plate amongst stuff they like that is new and something that I expect them to ' try' - it seems to work as their fussiness is declining and the fussy eaters have a bigger repatoire. The good eaters and DH and I are great role models to the more fussy eaters which does encourage them to try.

If all that sounds a little complicated I think it wins over storing lunch boxes, putting up with unhealthy provision and green envy of their friends lunch box content. Plus I still would need to prepare our lunch anyway!

If a child is here when it is my dinner time 6.30 then they are offered a portion of our dinner. If one of my parents have a late meeting and have arranged to be late -after 5.30 but before 6.30 then I will give them a pasta based meal as by the time they get home it could be too late for parents to prepare a dinner - but I usually know in advance and it is rare.
But all mine are gone usually by 5.

[Merlot]

Thanks for the replies but I do all this already. The thing that gets to me is I spend a lot of time planning and preparing to do a meal that everyone has eaten before so I know they like it. I plan lots of meal so have to be very organised. If I fed them crap I could understand.

I always prepare meals that I can save and freeze. I put the smallest amount on the plate. To give you an example of a 9 and 7 year old, I have a small plate with half a small chicken fillet on, dessert spoonful of mash, and a dessert spoonful of veg (normally carrot and peas) with gravy. They've even left this. I don't allow pudding until they've eaten their meal and it's all food that they like so there's no excuse. I have a 3 year old that eats more than the pair of them put together. It's not just these 2 though it's all of them. Yes I do food to suit all and make food that I can do left overs. I have one parent that doesn't want to pay for food so sends a pack up so the awkwardness of who's got what happens already.

I've done a healthy eating plan with all the kids and broken it down to show why we need all the vitamins and nutrients, what they do for our body and which foods give us this. I do little tasters of different foods all the time and get children involved with preparation. For religious festivals we always incorporate food into it so they get to try the food - that's the biggest battle getting anyone to get it past their lips! Even playing shops I use fresfruit and veg and chop it up to show the children and allow them to taste it.

My biggest problem is that I really try to make sure everyone is happy and work hard, so feel completely deflated when they start whinging about everything. I never used to do tea meals then ended up doing it for one and lots more wanted it. I've spoken to lots of local childminders who state they no longer offer food because of the hassle I'm having.

I think I'm in the wrong job. Right now I'm sick of awkward whinging children who are never happy with anything I do. Parents are always happy but I think I would be if I'd got rid of the kids all week! I've been doing this job for several years now and my patience is wearing thin.

[bunyip]

I absolutely agree and sympathise with you.

I think sometimes we make the fundamental mistake of caring too much.

Sometimes, you can only get through this sort of thing by understanding you've done your job by planning, shopping, teaching, and getting a good meal on their plates. What they do with it at that point is beyond our control and entirely up to them.

But it's never an easy reality to just accept.

[singingcactus]

It sounds a bit like meal times have become a high stress and high emotion time of your day. Maybe try to pull it all back and just do some buffet style meals for a couple of weeks. Where the kids can serve themselves. Or better yet, get them prepping it for you. Sometimes this job can suck, it can get ridiculously intense, and you need to find a way to dial it back and take the pressure off.
Cook yourself a rocking meal every day, and give them a cheese toastie and soup . Eat off paper plates, with plastic cutlery. Eat on a blanket under the table. Have a masterchef competition in your kitchen with the kids being the contestants, and you the judge (payback rules!!!). Eat with chopsticks only. Just have sandwiches and veggie sticks. Only eat yellow food. Just try to change it all up a bit, forget nutrition for a week and try to decompress meal times a bit.
You sound like you're doing a cracking job, so don't tie yourself up in knots. It's just a phase for them all, you'll all suddenly come out the other end alive and healthy

[BallyH]

Yes this can be very soul destroying as you obviously put so much time and effort into it. My parents have to provide lunchboxes. I find this easy. Anything unhealthy stays in the lunchbox and I mention it to parents on pickup. They soon get the message. I now provide 'lite tea' served at 4.30pm. Monday was pasta bolognaise, my family had spaghetti bolognaise. Tuesday they had cheesey beans on toast. Over time I found out that some of the children were eating at mine and then eating with family again at around 6.30 so I started not to stress so much. A childminding friend got so upset at wastage that she does a small cooked lunch at midday for lo's and then in the evening, for them and the schoolies, she does toasted sandwiched and salad and fruit etc. Parents initially didn't want the change but she said most of them got a free hot dinner at lunchtime.

[natlou82]

I go through phases of feeling exactly the same as you, so you are certainly not alone. I've tried lighter teas but this doesn't really suit my plans for the day and the EYFS children. I really don't want parents providing meals. I decided a while ago to provide a rotating menu, which I email to all parents. What is on the menu is what I serve, everyone is served the same. I've had to change my attitude towards mealtimes to eat what is served or eat at home, parents know this too. Just take the pressure off yourself a little, we can only do so much :-) Good luck on how you decide to move forward with this.

[k1rstie]

I used to get stressed too. I realised that each child either ate the food I provided or didn't!!

[Merlot]

I've had some replies back from parents from the questionnaires. I've started doing meals I believe they will eat (according to replies from parents) and they get nothing else until the next meal if they leave it. I'm giving it until Easter and if there's no change then I will offer a light snack after school and ask parents for packed lunches. I have also considered doing a 3 week rota for meals like the school do. Would normally wave the white flag and say I'm quitting meals but due Ofsted soon! Trying to stay positive