Business head

[Merlot]

Hi

I'm new to this forum but have been childminding for almost 2 years now. I would like some advice on a parent of mine please. I currently care for 4 siblings of whom I'm friends with the parents - 2 under 5 and 2 over 8. Because this is my work I have always told my friend that business is business and she will be charged just like any other parent. Everything is clearly stated in my paperwork and signed and everyone agrees. I have never had an issue with payment but friend has often queried things like one morning she doesn't need me so can I have the children one afternoon instead. I told her no as her contracts states her hours are blah, blah etc. She was fine with this but will often ask questions about my charges. Like I say, everything is black and white and in the contract. The only thing I did tell her verbally, but not in the contract was that in the holidays, if the over 8's didn't want to come (as they would rather go to family), providing the under 5's increased their hours (as they are at nursery during term time) I wouldn't charge my half rate in the holidays for the over 8's. The bill works out pretty much the same and everyone is happy. This has worked for the last 18 months.

I am having issues with meals at the moment. The parents don't want to pay for my meals so send half a pack up which is neither here nor there or sending ingredients for me to cook for their pack up. I have explained that a packed lunch or tea is a ready cooked meal for re-heating or a lunchbag. I have always had to explain my reasons which never seem to sink in. I have recently explained that sending me raw ingredients for me to cook for 30 minutes is not a pack up. This didn't go down too well despite me being very careful with my words.

I have contracts for the children and most weeks on certain days, the parents are late collecting and I charge accordingly and they pay. Sometimes I am notified that the time will be late. I have asked for 7 days notice for times to be changed but this is in the contract anyway. I feel that both parents want every last second of childcare from me. If they arrive home early they will park up around the corner then call at my house spot on time or 5 minutes late. This is becoming a regular occurance and on certain occasions it's been 15-20 minutes late. Due to problems at work and the sob story about having to pay for more child care, I've often let it slip and not charged. I am now getting extremely sick of being messed about constantly and now wish I'd never taken on a friends children. Business and pleasure don't mix!

My friend has now asked for more hours 1 particular day as she has to work late. This is a one off. She wants to bring the children later and collect later which means more hours and more money, but they usually start before my start time where I charge a higher rate. This is in the contract. Do I still charge the higher rate plus the extra hours and how do I approach her on her time keeping. It's been mentioned loads of times in the past and she's kind of laughed it off calling me a whinger. I'm getting sick of it as for me it's an issue that needs addressing. I want to keep friends but need to get my business head on which I don't think she always understands so will instantly take offence. I know if I end the contracts it will end the friendship and make like difficult as we see one another every day at school.

[rickysmiths]

Do they sign your register every week confirming the hours their child was with you? I use the Pacey Register and have always had parents sign. If parents are consistently late I invite them in for a contract review and offer to extend their hours as they clearly are having difficulty with the hours they have. If they refuse and say they will come on time in future I make it very clear that if they are late again I will apply my late collection fee. Mine is £5 for every 15 mins or part of 15 mins.

If they ask to drop off later than normal contracted time and stay later they pay normal contracted fee (their choice to drop later) and are charged for the extra time in full half hours at the appropriate rate as detailed in my contracts.

I had a parent who would sit outside until the contracted time, sometimes for half an hour that is their choice they have paid for the contracted time, this family also brought the child to me if they had a few days off on the basis they had paid so they were going to use the time. Again they have and it is their choice I just felt as this child was with me 40 hours a week they didn't want to spend time with him when they had time off. None so queer as folk as they say.

Get tough and put your business head on.

[shortstuff]

Exactly as Ricky says If they choose to drop off late that is their decision, you still have the place available for them. It is their choice not to use it. For me it would be usual fee plus the additional time at the end of the day. If the parent doesnt like it could she find an alternative CM that would do all of this for her? Im sure not.

If any parent turned up with raw ingredients for me to cook for lunch they would still be charged half fees for that food as it is your gas/ electric being used. They would also be told that if it happened again I would not be prepared to cook their raw ingredients (especially if it isnt in the original packaging as who knows what BB date is on it) and as such I would charge full meal fees and prep something from my kitchen.

It probably is time for another open chat with this parent and remind her that although you are friends and you value that she is playing around with your means to make a living and therefor affecting your family. A true friend would not do this.

[LauraS]

I wouldn't be cooking their raw ingredients. Environmental health requires us to keep receipts and records for a reason, so that the source of any instances of food poisoning can be traced and investigated. Who is to say whether an instance of food poisoning originating from your premises could be down to poorly stored raw ingredients provided by mum, or your poor cooking methods?? I wouldn't be taking the risk.

I know how hard it is with family and I have had very similar issues minding for a relative. My problems were largely late collection and late payment, and it went on for a very long time because, as you know, it's awkward. All I can say is that you have to be blunt and stick to your guns. Send out a letter giving notice that you will be enforcing late collection fees, if you don't have that already, and stick to it. Look at the packing up at the door and turn away if not adequate, and enforce a notice period for changing from packing up to meals so that you can plan your menus properly. Charge for the extra time despite the late drop off, they are paying for the space, not the time. You know that you have to do this because if you don't, they will see you as a drop in shop and will be picking and choosing their hours.

I know it's hard to actually do any of this when it's friends (I really really do) but you will feel great once it's done, like a weight has been lifted. I felt resentful all the time, and it's not nice to feel that way. Remember it's the parents who have the problem. They wouldn't expect to argue with tesco over the cost of a packet of biscuits, or try and take a few biscuits out of a packet and pay less, or add a few more in for the same fee etc etc. that's because tesco make clear what you are getting for your money and then stick to it, rigidly. You just need to do the same. What's the worst they can do, take the children elsewhere (to another cm who has four spaces?!?). Or stop being friends? Like they are anyway?

Good luck, let us know what you decide.

[alwaysright]

my friend once asked me to have her daughter and i said thanks but no thanks! i would end up losing my temper with you becasue i know you would take the mick and we'd fall out! she laughed and said fair enough because she knew i was right! she tells me stuff about her childminder now and i tell her well thats exactly what i'd do, or well i would actually charge you more...so glad i didnt take her!
i agree with everything rickismith says...some parents just want to get every second they paid for and dont seem to want that extra time with their babies