Angry and really, really disappointed

**Kiddleywinks** · 27-09-2012, 06:46 AM

Went to our local forum meeting last night, armed and dangerous I was - or so I thought

I am a new minder, what do I know?!
This comes around every few years, it'll die down again.
It'd take a long time (years) for this to be passed at government level by which time a new government will be in place and put a stop to it.
Deregulation would be better - hear hear, lets get it back to how it was (Social Services visits/Local DO visits)
The LA would be our agency (REALLY?! With all THEIR cutbacks?!)
Who cares? They'll do what they want regardless
It's a done deal, not worth fighting it now

I came away so angry at the complacency and lethargic attitude of 'my peers'

These people are the first to b***h about how there's nothing going on to promote minding, but then aren't prepared to 'man a stall' for an hour or two or even just half an hour to relieve a newbie that IS prepared to do it all day on a weekend.
Then, are happy to complain at the next meeting that 'well we thought there was going to be a stall but there wasn't one' NO, BECAUSE THERE WERE ONLY TWO CONFIRMED VOLUNTEERS, THAT HAVE THEIR OWN FAMILIES TOO AND COULDN'T DO 12 HOUR DAYS BETWEEN THEM TO PROMOTE YOUR BUSINESS AS WELL AS THEIR OWN AT THE WEEKEND

Aaaaargh! Why are some established minders so damn negative all the time? Where's their get up and go?! And more importantly WHY has their get up and go, got up and gone?!

I cannot explain to you in words how disheartening it felt being a la single voice in a room full of 25 'established' minders.
Talk about bursting your bubble!

Sorry to dump it all here, but I have never felt as alone in this career as I do right now

BucksCM · 27-09-2012, 07:13 AM

Just to let you know as "an established "childminder of 18 years, I can honestly say that I'm with you on this!!

I see the same in the cm in my area! Trying to get some of them motivated is annoying! We went to an IABN last year and there was a lady talking about dental health care as part of the "Smile" award...well...talk about rude...whispering behind me about grannies and eggs!!

It's another certificate under your belt that you didn't have to pay for!!

I will say though, to balance it, they are not all that bad, there are a few good ones who try an embrace the change.

**gegele** · 27-09-2012, 07:16 AM

i'm sorry you feel that way. People are going to fall on me like a tonne of brick BUT in the last 13years that i spent in england it's something i saw a lot "i can't believe they're doing this...we should do that..." "yeah hear hear..so who's doing it..??" " not me...i'm not spending my week end...it won't change a thing anyway...blablabla " and then "i can't believe they did this how do you want us to..."

noboby is happy, but nobody wants to do anything about anything...

**Mouse** · 27-09-2012, 07:58 AM

I've said all along that this (lethergy among childminders, disinterest, the belief that deregulation will be better) is going to be as big a problem as the government itself.

Not only are campaigners fighting the government, but also other childminders who either don't know, don't care, or are happy to accept the changes.

I would say though, it's not just the established childminders. Most of the newer childminders at our group have a totally 'don't care, what will be will be' attitude.

**sarah707** · 27-09-2012, 05:38 PM

I completely agree! Of the childminders I have spoken to locally only one or 2 are really up-to-date on the subject and concerned about the possible impact on their businesses.

A lot say they'll do something else... but the 'something' isn't clear and I really don't think they have thought it through

Hopefully the ones of us who do care will be able to shout loudly enough

**loocyloo** · 27-09-2012, 06:24 PM

i have been trying to get people together is discuss the childcare comissions questions...

2 local minders are interested but we just can not find time to physically meet ! doing it by email & text chat! the rest, not bothered and say we can't do anything about it anyway

i do know that quite alot of minders in my LA ARE interested, just none of them are local to me! interestingly, though, the minders who are interested, are the ones who are passionate about minding

**Kiddleywinks** · 27-09-2012, 06:42 PM

Thanks ladies, makes me feel a little better that it's not just me feeling frustrated.
I've calmed down a little today, 'regrouped' my thoughts, and decided that I will try to find some like minded minders before the deadline next week.

To be fair, I think the fact that there is so little time, nothing coming from 'official' channels (ofsted/my local LA/Development officers) and yes, I am new to minding so don't really know anyone - I'm not 'in' with anyone/cliquey with other minders etc, has in part frustrated me more, because I really believed bringing it up at our childminding forum would have generated something far more positive/supportive than it actually did.

It totally took the wind out of my sails, and felt I was made to feel an inch tall.

I lost that battle (

well and truly!) but the war's not over yet

TheBTeam · 27-09-2012, 09:09 PM

No not really getting through to people either! Getting the it wont happen or they will do it anyway speeches.

**The Juggler** · 27-09-2012, 09:14 PM

i was shocked at the meeting I went to last night with Bushpig. About 10 of us were there. 2 organisers, me and Bushpig, and a group of others. Not one of the others seemed even aware of the "agency" model being proposed or deregulation

**Ripeberry** · 27-09-2012, 09:14 PM

Too many people expect others to sort things out for them and then they complain when things go wrong. I've seen it when on committees for pre-schools.
No-one will fight and help out to save their pre-school and then they moan when it closes

**Kiddleywinks** · 28-09-2012, 05:47 AM

Yes ripeberry, I agree!

Many moons ago, I was on the committee of our local preschool. As it was a charity, we were required to have x amount of parents to run it and I remember one year we had a devil of a job trying to get parents to stay behind after the morning session/come 10 minutes early for the afternoon one, for us to hold our AGM, and elect the new committee.
Parents were quite happy to let children attend so long as they didn't have to do anything!

In the end, our outgoing chair, who'd had enough by this time, just shut the group on our busiest day. No warning, just stood there and refused to open the door. It was hilarious. We handed out a flyer to every single parent informing them there was a meeting being held about reopening the preschool, and for any parents that weren't at that meeting, their children would no longer have a place, and if no one attended, the preschool would remain closed permanently!
It was the one and only time I have seen EVERY single parent at the AGM.
Unorthodox - definately, bully boy tactics - absolutely, but by god it worked. There was a full compliment of committee members when we left, with a couple of 'spares'

Anyone know of any tactics to encourage minders to at least show SOME interest in trying to change/participate?!

**merry** · 28-09-2012, 06:24 AM

I am one of those who feel it's a 'done deal'. Don't get me wrong, I've signed the petition, forwarded it to everyone I know, written letters to my mp and others etc., but genuinely feel it won't really make any difference and it will go ahead anyway. Plenty of us who have been in childminding a long time have complained and protested various things in the past and it hasn't made any difference, perhaps some just feel a bit battle-weary and like there's not much point. Lots of childminders I know are really struggling with lack of work, difficult children or parents, financial problems, personal problems, and just don't have the energy for anything else.

**Ripeberry** · 28-09-2012, 07:03 AM

Originally Posted by merry

I am one of those who feel it's a 'done deal'. Don't get me wrong, I've signed the petition, forwarded it to everyone I know, written letters to my mp and others etc., but genuinely feel it won't really make any difference and it will go ahead anyway. Plenty of us who have been in childminding a long time have complained and protested various things in the past and it hasn't made any difference, perhaps some just feel a bit battle-weary and like there's not much point. Lots of childminders I know are really struggling with lack of work, difficult children or parents, financial problems, personal problems, and just don't have the energy for anything else.

But if they think it will get easier being deregulated, they will have a shock. If it ever does go ahead I think I'll become a live out nanny as my own kids are getting older now so I'll have more time.

**Ripeberry** · 28-09-2012, 07:08 AM

Originally Posted by Kiddleywinks

Yes ripeberry, I agree!

Many moons ago, I was on the committee of our local preschool. As it was a charity, we were required to have x amount of parents to run it and I remember one year we had a devil of a job trying to get parents to stay behind after the morning session/come 10 minutes early for the afternoon one, for us to hold our AGM, and elect the new committee.
Parents were quite happy to let children attend so long as they didn't have to do anything!

In the end, our outgoing chair, who'd had enough by this time, just shut the group on our busiest day. No warning, just stood there and refused to open the door. It was hilarious. We handed out a flyer to every single parent informing them there was a meeting being held about reopening the preschool, and for any parents that weren't at that meeting, their children would no longer have a place, and if no one attended, the preschool would remain closed permanently!
It was the one and only time I have seen EVERY single parent at the AGM.
Unorthodox - definately, bully boy tactics - absolutely, but by god it worked. There was a full compliment of committee members when we left, with a couple of 'spares'

Anyone know of any tactics to encourage minders to at least show SOME interest in trying to change/participate?!

Problem is too many think it will mean the end of paperwork and they think, yes great! But if nurseries regulate us they might bring in their own way of doing things. We won't feel as we are the 'boss' of our own business.
I can see people dropping out altogether and just becoming illegal minders as they seem to get away with everything. If we so much as sneeze over a child we get hauled over the coals just because we get registered and do the right thing. We are just easier to prosecute and that's what regulatory bodies love