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Newbie1!
20-03-2012, 08:07 AM
Im not sure how to tackle this one - to start with I laughed it off a bit but its getting a bit beyond a joke now!!

I have a mindee who is 4 1/2, hes very hard work, mum believes to be ADHD but doesnt want to take for proper testing...anyway.....a few weeks ago mum called me after they had left to ask whether I had fed him as he was saying he hadnt had anything to eat. I have him 12noon to 5.30 so he has lunch 12.30, afternoon snack about 3 and hot main meal at 5pm.

Anyway on a few occasions now she has questionned what he has eaten as he has been making comments at home and then twice in the last week when mum has collected I have opened the door and he has run to her and said "mummy im hungry".

Last night was the prime example, he had eaten all of his lunch (offered a little more but refused) eaten his snack - same again, then ate his tea. He finished this at 5.10 and mum came at 5.20. He was puffing and blowing all the way through his tea saying he was full up, he had one mouthful left so I asked whether he was too full to finish and he said he would manage that mouthful but didnt want any more or any fruit/dessert....he then came into the playroom and collapsed on the sofa puffing and blowing at being full up! The second I open the door to mum he runs to the door and in a whining voice tells her how hungry he is....I was not impressed and asked him directly how he could be hungry when seven minutes earlier he had refused food because he was too full :angry::angry:

Mum then does this...."awww, are you sweetie" and puts her arms around him and sort of gives me a half look. I explain what hes eaten and the fact that he literally finished his dinner five mins earlier with lots of puffing and blowing but she never acknowledges what Im saying.....flipping it over - if that happened to me I would then say to my DD "why are you saying you are hungry when you have just said you were full and refused food" and see what her reply was but mum almost looks at me like Im starving him!!

Any ideas please!!! :panic::panic:

mama2three
20-03-2012, 08:17 AM
photographs!
Sounds like he knows exactly how to wrap mum round his little finger and she cant / wont see it. Start taking photos of him at dinner time - tell him they are to show mum if he tells her he hasnt eaten! Let him know he cant manipulate you the same way as he does mum! Sounds like mum is making excuses for his behaviour rather than wanting to sort it out.

wendywu
20-03-2012, 08:18 AM
Take photos of him at the table with his plate full of food in front of him, and tell him why you are doing it.

So then she can see what he has been given to eat, :mad:

cabby
20-03-2012, 08:44 AM
photographs!
Sounds like he knows exactly how to wrap mum round his little finger and she cant / wont see it. Start taking photos of him at dinner time - tell him they are to show mum if he tells her he hasnt eaten! Let him know he cant manipulate you the same way as he does mum! Sounds like mum is making excuses for his behaviour rather than wanting to sort it out.

i had to do this with one of my mindees, he was the same, would eat everything i gave him then go home and tell mum he didnt have dinner so she would give him crisps and chocolate :angry::angry: the photos soon put a stop to it x

Toothfairy
20-03-2012, 08:45 AM
I have a mindee who will only eat fruit for me but not for his parents.
When he first started with me I had to video him eating the fruit, as the Mum didn't believe he was eating it for me. She thought I was just throwing it in the bin and saying he had eaten it (they bring packed lunches).

If it was me, I would be recording in his daily diary what he had eaten through the day and take photo's/video clips of him eating.

That way if the child says they are hungry, you have evidence to prove they have been fed. :D

Good luck :thumbsup:

Jods
20-03-2012, 10:12 AM
as all previously mentioned, I would also send (if possible not too exspensive etc) the photos at the time!! and take a video if possible x good luck x

~Chelle~
20-03-2012, 11:17 AM
as all previously mentioned, I would also send (if possible not too exspensive etc) the photos at the time!! and take a video if possible x good luck x

I was going to say the same thing.

I had a similar thing where parent used to ask what child had eaten and I would say scrambled egg on toast or ham sandwich and she questioned me about it as child NEVER eats that at home :rolleyes:

I actually video'd the child eating it and asked them if it was nice and they would say "mmmm yes" and I showed it to mum one day and she was a bit embarrassed!

I would do the same, video him eating or take photos. It does annoy me when kids play up as soon as they parents arrive and make out that you are a liar! x x

onceinabluemoon
20-03-2012, 12:08 PM
Photos are the way to go from me as well. I would want to stop this now and not let it go any further. If mum thinks you are starving him he eats at 11.30 before he comes in, has snack with you and eats again at 5.30 when he goes home. Simples! (One thing I really hate is children/adults who lie, can you tell?)

I would photo him without him knowing, because otherwise the day you don't do it he will be back to square one again. I would do full plate, half empty plate, empty plate and show her at pick up when he says he's hungry and then get her to back you up even if you have to say "see you have had plenty to eat, hasnt he mummy?"

Make a note of whats being said in your diary or put a note in his folder if you don't have a diary, put photos in to back up the fact you are feeding him because if he says this in the wrong place and they believe him Ofsted may well be involved so best to cover all bases.

Newbie1!
20-03-2012, 02:31 PM
Thanks all :thumbsup::thumbsup:

cant text photos as the mo as orange have cocked my settings up but can def take and print off for journal etc. He had lunch today, second mindee arrived 15 minutes later and he went on to tell her he was starving and hadnt eaten all day!! :eek::eek: Cheeky little "£$%^&*!!!!

Took piccies of him eating dinner and have asked him, just in general chit chat why he told his mum he was starving yet had told me he was full up - he just stared at me blankly (which is what he does - all the time!!) xx