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View Full Version : Potty Training Advice please



EmmaReed84
23-02-2012, 05:30 PM
Just looking for some help, tips, advice on potty training DS.

He was 3 in November, he can tell me when he HAS soiled his nappy also when he has just wet (but not all the time for a wee). He is in pull ups purely for the fact he is able to change himself when he wets, which he likes to do sometimes.

DH is getting really frustrated and the Friday before half term he was off so thought he would train him... He put pants on DS, got the potty out and sat DS on for a few minutes every 30 minutes. The novelty soon wore off amd DS just wet himself.

DS just seems to have no interest whatsoever in training and is perfectly happy wetting and soiling his pull ups. I have tried treats, stickers, praise, asking, we have books and even his older brother gets involved but DS just gets annoyed.

I dont want to push him too hard and I know DS will do it eventually and will never be 21 in the pub calling me to change him!! But still he is getting on now and I feel that he should be clean.

miffy
23-02-2012, 05:43 PM
If you've tried and are getting nowhere then I'd forget it for a couple of months then try again - if your ds picks up your frustrations then it might put him under pressure.

You know that he will get there eventually and a couple of months can make all the difference.

Miffy xx

rickysmiths
23-02-2012, 05:57 PM
I must say I hate pull ups. They don't give the child any idea of being uncomfortable when wet or soiled and may I say that allowing him to wet them and be able to remove them himself will not in my experience aid training at all.

I think you have to just go without when you star to train. I would leave it now. get rid of the pull ups and put him back in nappies.

Then book a couple of weeks holiday maybe between you a dh so there are no distractions and go for it with no nappies apart from bed time.

One of my friends firmly believes that a child should be put in cloth nappies prior to training so they know how uncomfortable it is. I don't think I would go that far though I think modern nappies are not helpful to the process.

EmmaReed84
23-02-2012, 06:03 PM
I must say I hate pull ups. They don't give the child any idea of being uncomfortable when wet or soiled and may I say that allowing him to wet them and be able to remove them himself will not in my experience aid training at all.

I think you have to just go without when you star to train. I would leave it now. get rid of the pull ups and put him back in nappies.

Then book a couple of weeks holiday maybe between you a dh so there are no distractions and go for it with no nappies apart from bed time.

One of my friends firmly believes that a child should be put in cloth nappies prior to training so they know how uncomfortable it is. I don't think I would go that far though I think modern nappies are not helpful to the process.

I mentioned to DH about putting DS back in nappies (much cheaper) and he thinks it is taking a backwards step... When DS was in the pants he wasn't bothered about being wet.

DS had hypospadias (his "manhood didn't grow properly, google it for more info) anyway he had to have an op when he was 18 months old and everythng since has been perfect... Do you think that this could have anything to do with it? The only reason I haven't gone to the docs yet is because he wont either wee or poo so it is not like he can do one but not the other so dont really think that it is linked, but not sure if it would have an affect on both aspects of training IYSWIM.

candy cat
23-02-2012, 06:35 PM
I personally hate pull ups....they are nappies .....children need to feel if they are wet/dirty......lots of cheap pants are best and lots of small towels for mopping up :panic:......good luckx

sharonmanc
23-02-2012, 06:44 PM
i just started this week with my daughter 31 months, i used pull ups with knickers inside, she flet the wet, but they were too absorbant, she just did not care to be honest, so i have left it for a fewmonths, i have just invested in some cloth training pants, as they will not let leaks out, but they will allow her to feel uncomfortable, I am going to try again after easter, and if not nearer her 3rd birthday, I would say get rid of the pull ups, go back to nappies for a month or so, get the pressure off then start again either with just wants or some cloth training pants.

rickysmiths
23-02-2012, 06:48 PM
I mentioned to DH about putting DS back in nappies (much cheaper) and he thinks it is taking a backwards step... When DS was in the pants he wasn't bothered about being wet.

DS had hypospadias (his "manhood didn't grow properly, google it for more info) anyway he had to have an op when he was 18 months old and everythng since has been perfect... Do you think that this could have anything to do with it? The only reason I haven't gone to the docs yet is because he wont either wee or poo so it is not like he can do one but not the other so dont really think that it is linked, but not sure if it would have an affect on both aspects of training IYSWIM.

I have no idea I'm afraid about the above condition. All I know is that with both my children and all but one mindee to date that once started the longest it took to be dry during the day was a week and none have used pull ups.

As a childminder I will not potty train as such, but will support when it has been cracked. The only one and I have had a lot, that has gone a different way was put in pull ups and instead of staying at home for the two weeks off the parents went on a two week car touring holiday and wondered why lo wasn't trained when they got home :rolleyes:

Playmate
23-02-2012, 06:49 PM
So difficult because they are all so different. I'm doing 2 at the moment 2.6 and 2.8 yrs :panic: we are actually doing quite well as long as I remember to take them hourly. They both have the control but won't ask to go. We have used stickers, but in all honesty they are not that interested in them. Just hoping if we keep going and I gradually leave them longer each time, they will eventually ask or take themselves. I personally don't use a potty we use the toilet, too many little ones here to leave pottys around ;)

Agree with everyone else on the pull ups :D

gigglinggoblin
23-02-2012, 07:17 PM
I wouldnt consider nappies a step back because I dont see pull ups as a step forward, I dont understand the point of telling a child they are all grown up because they are in pull ups when they use them just like a nappy. If he isnt bothered then you either live with the fact that he will wet himself until he is ready (I know parents who lived with months worth of accidents because they felt it was better to be in pants) or leave it til he is ready. I was starting to think one of mine would never train, he was 3y10m and did it in a day, no accidents or stress. I definately wouldnt use pull ups if you are trying to train, better with nothing on at all imo, often pants can confuse them at first.

gigglinggoblin
23-02-2012, 07:18 PM
So difficult because they are all so different. I'm doing 2 at the moment 2.6 and 2.8 yrs :panic: we are actually doing quite well as long as I remember to take them hourly. They both have the control but won't ask to go. We have used stickers, but in all honesty they are not that interested in them. Just hoping if we keep going and I gradually leave them longer each time, they will eventually ask or take themselves. I personally don't use a potty we use the toilet, too many little ones here to leave pottys around ;)


Oh the conversations I have had because parents think taking them every hour without them asking means they are trained! Makes me grind my teeth just thinking about it!

LOOPYLISA
23-02-2012, 07:26 PM
I must say I hate pull ups. They don't give the child any idea of being uncomfortable when wet or soiled and may I say that allowing him to wet them and be able to remove them himself will not in my experience aid training at all.

I think you have to just go without when you star to train. I would leave it now. get rid of the pull ups and put him back in nappies.

Then book a couple of weeks holiday maybe between you a dh so there are no distractions and go for it with no nappies apart from bed time.

One of my friends firmly believes that a child should be put in cloth nappies prior to training so they know how uncomfortable it is. I don't think I would go that far though I think modern nappies are not helpful to the process.

I agree i hate pull ups, to me they are like a nappy :rolleyes:

Bluebell
23-02-2012, 08:20 PM
Emma - my son was 4 in December and we potty trained him at Christmas when we both had some time at home.
I like you was like really laid back and left him til he was ready and he did it when he was ready ( we said his birthday, he said no - christmas) BUT I would say the older he got the more of an issue it was - not for us but for him. He found it embarrassing and there were times when we suggested he go bare round the house or just in pants between last nappy change and bath time and he would scream and wail at the idea of not having a nappy! We also tried everything stickers, rewards, bribery, a posh potty but the main issue was not him being unable to remember to go but the fact he flat refused to go without a nappy in the first place. He would try and grab soiled nappies to put them back on if we suggested going without! I think toward the end it was such an issue for him that it was hard for us to pretend that it wasn't an issue - iyswim. He starts school in September so I had that in the back of my head too.
It did get embarrassing when parents were potty training their 2 year olds and I hadn't even managed to get him to start! My other son was fine - 2 years old and he just did it. Children are all different but I think maybe I should have pushed him a bit earlier, if your son wants to do it definitely go for it but give him a couple of days in pants and realising that he is wet if he forgets to go. We found pull ups confuses as it is just like wearing a nappy.

Playmate
23-02-2012, 08:30 PM
Oh the conversations I have had because parents think taking them every hour without them asking means they are trained! Makes me grind my teeth just thinking about it!

They may not be trained totally but its a start! I would never put them back in nappies as both of them have control. I suppose partly its my choice to take them hourly (infact today it has been 1.5 hrly and both did ask on one occaision :D) because with having 6 under 5's I don't want accidents every 5 mins. It worked for the last one I trained she had no accidents after the 1st day and after 2-3 weeks independently to herself to the toilet :D

Playmate
23-02-2012, 08:41 PM
I have no idea I'm afraid about the above condition. All I know is that with both my children and all but one mindee to date that once started the longest it took to be dry during the day was a week and none have used pull ups.

As a childminder I will not potty train as such, but will support when it has been cracked. The only one and I have had a lot, that has gone a different way was put in pull ups and instead of staying at home for the two weeks off the parents went on a two week car touring holiday and wondered why lo wasn't trained when they got home :rolleyes:

This is usually what I would do. One of mine is term time only and mum started last week whilst on half term. My other one's parents said they tried at Christmas, but I don't think they tried very hard ;) I decided that as we were quieter last week that I would take the bull by the horns as they don't have another holiday at home until the summer. Parents were a bit shocked but said they would go along with it. In my opinion it is working although they didn't have a brilliant weekend with her, but she can be a control freak :laughing: