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keatingschick
31-01-2012, 09:20 PM
Today I went to a rhyme time with my 2 little mindees. The little girl 2yr 2 mo, is really into babies and was following a baby of around 9 months. She sat with him playing with a tamborine and then hit him on the head :(. I immediately brought her to me and asked what she did and she announced to me and another minder that she "hit the brown baby on the head". I went on to explain to her that we mustn't hit babies, we have to be nice to the baby and the baby is small, will get upset, will be hurt, etc. She then went to the baby and mum and said and signed sorry. When I went back to my seat the other minder was shocked that my mindee had said "brown baby" and insisted that at that at that age a child would not recognise skin colour and seemed pretty disgusted at my mindee. The little girl is very hot on colours at the moment and is pointing out every colour she sees, she walked in today and noticed I've changed the colour in my kitchen, pointing out my red microwave/kettle/toaster etc and telling me before it was silver. To me she has done nothing wrong and has not said this in a malicious/racist way, but the other minder seemed really put out by it and said that a child of that age would not see skin colour, and I suppose the fact I never said anything. But I don't feel in this instance that there is anything to say. It wasn't a racist or offensive comment. Am I wrong?

wendywu
31-01-2012, 09:23 PM
No different from saying the baby with the red hair, or freckles, or big ears :laughing:

Bless her she is only 2 and i suppose he did have brown skin, so nothing wrong with that. :panic:

blue bear
31-01-2012, 09:29 PM
Some children are able to notice and name colours earlier than others, your lo sounds very switched on, she just said it as she saw it Definetly nothing untoward about her comment in my opinion.

keatingschick
31-01-2012, 09:30 PM
Thanks, I just felt awful, but I didn't see anything at all, she IS very alert and concious of anything and everything, especially colour at the moment. She told me today she wants a purple something or other cos it woud match the cardi she was wearing. Thats her THING at the moment.
The childrens centre we visit has children and adults of all different races and so it was never about her suddenly recognising a different race or anything, it literally was noticeing the colour. If I put fake tan on this weekend she'd say something.

Tatjana
31-01-2012, 09:31 PM
Your minder friend is way over reacting, your mindee didn't say anything racist!! This how often how kids express themselves, no matter what colour they themselves are.

keatingschick
31-01-2012, 09:43 PM
Thanks all, yeah she is very observant, she is fab and she is so funny at times. At the rhyme time, the lady doing the rhyme time asked her what body parts she wanted for the song and she asked the lady if she liked her cardi!! She will come in and point out I have a slide in and tell me she has pigtails. And like I said today she was so funny when she was pointing out the change of colour scheme in my kitchen and saying how her mummys kitchen things are green.
It was just that I explained that I felt that it wasn't about her being aware of him having different skin colour, she didn't mention that, she literally said what she saw. And I was trying to get over that if she is able to identify colours then she is going to see the colour but my friend I think was MAYBE confusing this with the LO noticing difference in skin colour. She never mentioned that it literally was the colour.

jane5
31-01-2012, 10:26 PM
My dd came home from nursery and said that x was her best friend.

I asked what she liked about him and she said his brown face.......she has also told me that she likes y's long hair and z's new red shoes.

She says what she see's and is too young to know about racism. Its the other cm that has the problem in my opinion. People have gone way to pc friendly.

miffy
31-01-2012, 10:27 PM
I don't think there was anything racist in your mindees comment at all - she was saying what she saw, a baby with brown skin. Don't worry about it.

Miffy xx

Pipsqueak
31-01-2012, 10:44 PM
I'd be more concerned about your overly anxious overly PC colleague to be honest. It sounds like she is blowing hot air about things she 'has learned' and applying it to a 2yr old.

Think your colleague could do well with some additional training

AliceK
31-01-2012, 10:45 PM
Agree with the others :thumbsup:
In my opinion if you had said something to her about NOT mentioning peoples skin colour that would make it seem to her like there was a problem with people having brown skin. She said nothing wrong in my opinion.

xxxx

alwaysright
31-01-2012, 11:15 PM
my daughter when she was younger would refer to people as a colour according to what they were wearing! she would refer to a pink lady or a brown boy etc, she merely meant they were wearing that colour clothing but obviously i knew that but others didnt!! one time we were on the bus going into to town centre and a young black lad got on who also happened to be wearing black clothes, she was so busy looking at his ipod and was staring, she took a breath to say something and i knew what was about to come....i had to quickly stop her her from saying anything as i thought that would not go down well!! my daughter wasnt and isnt racist, as others have said she didnt notice anyones skin colour just their clothes!! think the other minder needs to chill a little, and get off the p.c gone mad bus!

winstonian
01-02-2012, 08:06 AM
my just 5 (last week) white daughter loves our baby mindee whose mum is black and dad is white. She kept stroking his arm when mum dropped him off and saying "I loves Xs brown skin". I went through the we all have different skin etc and although Xs skin is brown we would say he is black etc but she kept doing it - only in front of his mum and I ended up getting all upset and apologising to mum who basiscally told me I was daft and she was glad that my daughter loved her baby!
Thank goodness for reasonable people :)

NicoleW
01-02-2012, 08:14 AM
There was something on TV last night and there was a white woman with a black baby and my daughter says

"Why is that baby a different colour, they should be the same colour as its mummy. Like me and H have the same colour of skin like you"

When I explained to her that they didn't have to have the same colour of skin to be a family she says

"Just like when doggies have babies and they can sometimes have kittens instead of puppies"

JCrakers
01-02-2012, 08:20 AM
Ive had a similar sayinf from my mindee who was around the same age. I was walking with 2 people and when they had gone she askd me who the lady with the brown face was.
Kids that age are very interested in colour and also they are too young to understand the world and the racist comments that ignorant people say. I really wouldnt worry about the comment and your friend over reacted in my opinion, but dont blame her as these days we have to tread very carefully. Even the slightest word is often blown out of proportion.

ajs
01-02-2012, 09:07 AM
This is where pc is going mad, your mindee saw a colour and named it she did not say any thing offensive or racist, tell your friend to get a grip and wind her neck in

~Chelle~
01-02-2012, 09:19 AM
This is where pc is going mad, your mindee saw a colour and named it she did not say any thing offensive or racist, tell your friend to get a grip and wind her neck in

Couldn't agree more :thumbsup:

bluebell3
01-02-2012, 09:29 AM
I think that your friend should consider whether her finding describing a brown person as being brown 'offensive' is in itself offensive!
Does she see being described as 'brown' or 'black' as a derogatory comment? No matter who makes it! Its not as if the little girl said she hit the brown baby over the head because he is brown! She was merely stating a fact that she had observed the colour of his skin. Your lass sounds like a smashing girl!
Just out of interest what did your minder friend expect you to say? her making an issue out of it would just point out peoples differences in a negative way surely?

ziggy
01-02-2012, 09:32 AM
One of my oldest friends is a black jamaican lady, while we worked together in a nursery she and another (white) nursery nurse had the same surname. The children would often refer to my friend as 'the brown mrs. W'. She didnt take offence or find this a racist comment

~Grasshopper~
01-02-2012, 09:34 AM
aww i think she is very clever little 2 year old, my 4 year olds best friend this week is the boy with the brown face :), he's just saying what he sees and means no harm at all xx

Mummits
01-02-2012, 10:10 AM
My littl'un informed me that his new friend had a brown face - to match his hair, and that he was in fact brown all over (fits of giggles). I thought it best not to ask whether he's checked!

PerkyEars
01-02-2012, 10:10 AM
Agree with all of the above. Children obviously 'see' skin colour if they are switched on to colours - does she expect them to switch off their colour perception just for skin. :rolleyes:

My DD (4) always refers to people having 'brown skin' or 'peach skin', I've tried mentioning that often people talk about dark brown skin as 'black' and peach skin 'white' but she refuses to accept this innaccuracy. :laughing:

Mummits
01-02-2012, 10:14 AM
Agree with all of the above. Children obviously 'see' skin colour if they are switched on to colours - does she expect them to switch off their colour perception just for skin. :rolleyes:

My DD (4) always refers to people having 'brown skin' or 'peach skin', I've tried mentioning that often people talk about dark brown skin as 'black' and peach skin 'white' but she refuses to accept this innaccuracy. :laughing:

Yes my eldest always used to talk about people being brown, beige, cream or peach! Too much exposure to home decorating programmes do you think? He came home from reception class saying "I am not the only XXX in school. We also have them in brown and peach!" Made it sound like a fabric warehouse.

sharonmanc
01-02-2012, 10:37 AM
children see things as they are, My daughter 2 and a half is just getting into colours, my son was a little older when he said mummy was brown and he was white. I am mixed race, and so are my children, but they are very light skinned, in fact people dont realise they are mixed race until they see me, ha ha the first tiem i picked up my son from school when he had a new teacher in year 1, she was so used to the childminder picking him up, that she totally ignored me till the end until my son came up and asked if he could go home with mummy, because she did nto expect him to be mine, made me laugh, how people view things.

Anyway, I told my son that he was brown too, and he was adamant he was not, as he saw the colour white, now he is older he notices the skin subtlety, but smaller children dont, to your mindee, he was a "brown baby" nothing more, the other childminder is making something out of nothing, being overly PC, even as adults we often refer to features of a person to describe them, I have 2 friends called Nicolas, one white , one mixed race and when someone asks which Nicola, I sometimes still refer to them by colour , if a person has no idea which one I am talking about, and I know my friends do this too. Just as I know 2 Chris's one with red hair, so i often refer to his hair when I am explaining about something to another person.

I would have thought your Mindee was very observant at such a young age. Children do see colours but at this age they are not prejudice or racist unless it is taught.

jelly15
01-02-2012, 11:05 AM
Children do see colours but at this age they are not prejudice or racist unless it is taught.

I agree.

My DS1 used to love whatching the Gladiators on TV when he was little and one of them was a black man with the stage name Shadow. I live in a rural community with very little ethnic diversity, one day we were at the local shop when a black man walked in and my son shouts Shadow man. I was very embarrssed but the man didn't comment and just smiled at my son in his pushchair. All my son had done was make the connection that this man was black like Shadow but I was horrified that people wouldn't see it that way.

sharonmanc
01-02-2012, 11:18 AM
I agree.

My DS1 used to love whatching the Gladiators on TV when he was little and one of them was a black man with the stage name Shadow. I live in a rural community with very little ethnic diversity, one day we were at the local shop when a black man walked in and my son shouts Shadow man. I was very embarrssed but the man didn't comment and just smiled at my son in his pushchair. All my son had done was make the connection that this man was black like Shadow but I was horrified that people wouldn't see it that way.

ha ha this reminds me of my eldest daughter when around 2 and half woudl call every black man dad, because her dad is black, used to embarrass the hell out of me, where are my little girl now to her every man is a dad, just the word she associates with a man

caz3007
01-02-2012, 02:14 PM
I was mortified when a year 3 child was told off for being racist cos he referred to a girl as the girl with the brown face. The school thought he was being racist, he was only picking out that particular girl and she hadnt done anything wrong she was a prefect who had helped him. The school made him apologise to the girl and she said she wasnt bothered, it was the school who were making an issue of it, just like this Childminder is making an issue of the difference in school colour.

Helen Dempster
01-02-2012, 02:20 PM
I used to mind a Nigerian boy and when a newbie started, he told him that he "looks like chocolate". In a child's mind, there's nothing racist or malicious in a comment like that - most chocolate is brown, it's a fact. I think it's adults who cause the problems. It would be different if a child were to use a horrible word for different coloured skins, but in this instance from a 2 year old, I really wouldn't worry hun x

nikki thomson
01-02-2012, 02:31 PM
Hi, I don't think children mean anything by there comments, even older children, they see the world in black and white (if u pardon the expression) my lo is mixed race I've had her for a year and my dd said to me a few months back x is brown because she likes to sit in the sun, which made me chuckle.
My own brother who my parents fostered when he was 4mths old and is now 37 is Afro carribian and the children have never said not once why is uncle Peter black, they just don't see it. X

sharonmanc
01-02-2012, 02:36 PM
I used to mind a Nigerian boy and when a newbie started, he told him that he "looks like chocolate". In a child's mind, there's nothing racist or malicious in a comment like that - most chocolate is brown, it's a fact. I think it's adults who cause the problems. It would be different if a child were to use a horrible word for different coloured skins, but in this instance from a 2 year old, I really wouldn't worry hun x

how rediculous for that to happen, children say these things in all innocence, it is us as adults that put the slant on it, which then makes the children think they are doing something wrong, what gets me is if a child would say white boy, would the reaction be the same. Maybe not.

When i was teaching, when a fight broke out (inner city secondary) if a children were calling each other names, eg, black ***** or White *****, then the one who said black would get done for racism, but the other child would not, I dont think some people know how to deal with racism, there is very little training on it, I remember when doing my PGCE, the only training we had was a 2 hour lecture on black boys underachieving, no real practicle advice, or discussion on what is in fact racism, just the generic term explained, and most people left feeling puzzled.

I think some people hear something and dont know whther somethign is racist or not , but just to be on the safe side, they hop on the band wagon, really annoys me.

I find comments from Children lovely, like I said before I am mixed race but with a light complexion, but i have dreadlocks and they cause such a facination with people of all ages, babies love holding onto them, I often find when doing crafts or on floor level, I can feel little hands touching my hair, ha ha I have even had a year 11 student while i was marking her work reach out and start playing with my hair, without realising what she was doing. And the questions i get, it is not malicious, it is curiosity - ha ha have gone on with myself now :rolleyes:

sharonmanc
01-02-2012, 02:40 PM
Hi, I don't think children mean anything by there comments, even older children, they see the world in black and white (if u pardon the expression) my lo is mixed race I've had her for a year and my dd said to me a few months back x is brown because she likes to sit in the sun, which made me chuckle.
My own brother who my parents fostered when he was 4mths old and is now 37 is Afro carribian and the children have never said not once why is uncle Peter black, they just don't see it. X

Totally agree :thumbsup: