Male childminder and dogs?

[maladicta]

Hi everyone, we've just joined so forgive us if this has been answered before :)

Our little girl is 3 months old and we are considering whether my husband would/should try to become a registered childminder. At the moment he earns a decent wage but he loves being with our little girl so much and his three year old nephew absolutely dotes on him too.

Are we going to face the usual stigma of a male child minder? We have a beautiful house in semi-rural surroundings with sheep, cows and horses on the doorstep. Quite spacious too and we are thinking of adding a conservatory playroom.

We also have two (reasonably) large dogs, a lab cross and a collie cross. Both fantastic with kids and very laid back. Would this be considered a negative (I'm imagining so) along with the male childminder?

Grateful thanks for any help,

Angela x

[onceinabluemoon]

I'm not a man so can't answer on that count (however there are several male CMs on the forum) but I do have 2 dogs - a labrador and a spaniel - and nobody has found it a problem so far. In fact I have had parents say how lovely it is that their children can share the dogs as they can't have one of their own. :)

Hope that helps a little, and welcome :)

[jadavi]

I think it's great to have more men cms. All my children are from single mums who often dont have a good male role model in their lives. I think he would do well :)

[sarahjane]

I'm not a man so can't answer on that count (however there are several male CMs on the forum) but I do have 2 dogs - a labrador and a spaniel - and nobody has found it a problem so far. In fact I have had parents say how lovely it is that their children can share the dogs as they can't have one of their own. :)

Hope that helps a little, and welcome :)

I too can't answer about the male CM as have no experience of them, but I do have a lab and a springer too and again, this has never been a problem with any of my parents. :)

[Graham]

I am not a childminder but I am assistant to Pauline and to be honest I haven't come across any "stigma".

I wouldn't fancy being a childminder in my own right because of all the paperwork (I let Pauline do all that) but it is great playing with the kids and I am sure they benefit from having a male role model too.

Can't comment on dogs, we have a cat who we keep out of the way of the children as he can be a bit unpredictable, he's a grumpy old man now. :D

[angeldelight]

Hi Angela

Why not let him be your assistant like Graham? It might work out better for you both in the long term?

We have a dog and a cat and other pets we have never had a problem

Good luck

Angel xx

[mama2three]

Welcome to the forum , there are a few gents on here and hopefully they will be along to answer soon.
Unfortunately there will be parents out there who have a problem with a male childminder , and dogs, But there are also many many who will see the positives. He needs to sell what you have to offer - an amazing setting and a loving childminder .
Its never easy setting up , for anyone , do a bit of research and see if other minders in your area have vacancies or are full . Those first few mindees are always the hardest to come by. Once your dh is up and running then it will be word of mouth and reputation that keeps the business going.
Think about earnings , how much does he need to earn? If he is looking after your dd and nephew he will have one further under 5 place which restricts possible income - school wrap around care depends very much on area and whether the local schools offer their own ( usually cheap!) clubs.
Good Luck !

[Playmate]

Welcome to the forum :D

No I'm not a male Childminder, but my husband is. I would like to say there is no stigma, but in reality there is! We work together so it is not so much of any issue, but people have turned us down because he is male :angry: fortunately it doesn't happen very often. I think the biggest problem a male childminder working alone would face, is getting established. However that said many females struggle to get established. If it is something he really wants to do then I would say go for it, but be realistic about the time it takes to get setup and be prepared for some prejudice. My husband is a very proactive male CM and takes his role very seriously - sometimes to much so :rolleyes:

Regarding the dogs, I'm afraid I can't comment. However many CM's do have alsorts of pets :D

[Twinkles]

I work together with my husband who's also registered. A lot of parents have seen this as a positive thing.
However, I've known a couple of male childminders who work on their own who have had great trouble getting clients.

[Bob]

I'm male, and a registered childminder, and I have a chocolate labrador, cat, and about 60 tropical fish.

If I'm honest it's probably better to do a first aid course and become your wife's assistant. With the paediatric first aid course and permissions from parents about using an unsupervised assistant then you can do exactly as you would if you were registered in your own right. What you won't need is to pay OFSTED each year.

I agree that there shouldn't be any problems with being male, but I think there would be. We have a lot to offer childminding as men but I don't think I would get any minds at all if I wasn't working with my wife.

[Velleity]

I hate to say it but in all honesty I would not send my children to a male childminder unless I had known him well as a friend perhaps, before he became a childminder. I would feel different if it was a couple working together. I hope you don't all shout at me for saying it but I would not leave my children with a single man childminding.

[Jiorjiina]

I hate to say it but in all honesty I would not send my children to a male childminder unless I had known him well as a friend perhaps, before he became a childminder. I would feel different if it was a couple working together. I hope you don't all shout at me for saying it but I would not leave my children with a single man childminding.

I find it interesting that you feel like that, rayberrys, when you work in childcare yourself. Can you explain why you would feel uncomfortable?

I'm not trying to shout you down or anything, I'm genuinely curious.

[zippy]

If I'm honest, I'd probably be surprised if I turned up and found a male childminder, but the more I think about it the more I like it. You need to sell the things that you can bring as a male (not that a female can't) but sell all the outdoor things, the way you can offer a different style of learning from a male perspective. My daughter has a male teacher shes 7 an I wish she could have him forever, he's very sciencey and loves all the experiments. He has them shouting all the time in a good way and has done wonders for her confidence. Maybe you could volunteer your service to sone friends get some cracking references stating the great things you do put a photo album together then I'm sure you'll fly. Good luck and sorry for the wrong post lol

[Greengrass74]

I hate to say it but in all honesty I would not send my children to a male childminder unless I had known him well as a friend perhaps, before he became a childminder. I would feel different if it was a couple working together. I hope you don't all shout at me for saying it but I would not leave my children with a single man childminding.

I to am really interested as to why you would not send your children to a male childminder unless you knew them. I actually believe that comments like this are part of the cause of the stigma regarding men and childminding.

As a male childminder I have not recieved any negative comments and infact all our families (20 in all) love what I bring to the setting.

[Mouse]

I to am really interested as to why you would not send your children to a male childminder unless you knew them. I actually believe that comments like this are part of the cause of the stigma regarding men and childminding.

As a male childminder I have not recieved any negative comments and infact all our families (20 in all) love what I bring to the setting.

Do you work by yourself Dave?

There does seem to be a greater acceptance of men who work with their wife or partner than there does of men who work alone. And a lot of the resistance comes from other men.

We have a male childminder working in nearby & I gave his name to some of my parents who were moving away from where I live. The mum was wanted to go and visit, but the dad said no.

[Playmate]

I hate to say it but in all honesty I would not send my children to a male childminder unless I had known him well as a friend perhaps, before he became a childminder. I would feel different if it was a couple working together. I hope you don't all shout at me for saying it but I would not leave my children with a single man childminding.

mmm! We had a friend once who told Mick she wouldn't leave her child with a male (one of the many reasons we are no longer friends :laughing:). Her father and now her husband were clueless fathers and really had no interest in children and her assumption was that all males were the same. She would not accept that some men love being with children the same as many women. Infact she thought it totally unnatural that my husband did everything in the house that I do :panic:

[Velleity]

I have thought about it some more and it's a prejudice and a poor one and I can't think of any real reasoning behind it. My first reaction was simply that women are more nurturing and a baby would be better with a female carer. It's my prejudice of course and surely there are some fantastic male childminders out there. I'll think about it some more. I'm not one to discriminate on any grounds. I don't want to cause an offence. It was just my first reaction.

[Greengrass74]

Do you work by yourself Dave?

There does seem to be a greater acceptance of men who work with their wife or partner than there does of men who work alone. And a lot of the resistance comes from other men.

We have a male childminder working in nearby & I gave his name to some of my parents who were moving away from where I live. The mum was wanted to go and visit, but the dad said no.

I work in partnership with my wife. We are both registered childminders and both bring different things to the setting.

[cat lady at 38]

great to hear you thinking of becoming a cm, therea certainly not enough male ones, you could become your wifes assistant, you are alloweed just as many children when working with an assistant as two minders working together, good luck

[rosebud]

I hate to say it but in all honesty I would not send my children to a male childminder unless I had known him well as a friend perhaps, before he became a childminder. I would feel different if it was a couple working together. I hope you don't all shout at me for saying it but I would not leave my children with a single man childminding.

I just wanted to add that I would've loved a male childminder for my son when he was younger but there are none in our area, ultimately it doesn't matter to me whether someone is male or female but it does matter they have a genuine interest in children and are good at their job. Good luck

[mum2two]

I mind with my hubby and we have 2 dogs too! We are always full, and have parents coming back out tomorrow eve to sign contracts for the one space we have becoming available in Sept.

Most parents love the fact we work together, and the different aspects we each bring. They all love the fact we have dogs too, (2 Cav King charles), who are brilliant with the kids.

I like working with him (most of the time! :p) as it can be a lonely job sometimes. It's nice to have someone to support me too, when I'm having a 'bad day' and vice versa.

xx

[Helcatt]

My hubby works as my assistant, and I have to say that, on the whole there have been lots of positive responses from people

We have a number of single parent families who love the fact that there is a positive male role model for their child and we have discussed on many an occasion, with parents, all the different things we bring to the setting. ie I am more creative and good at planning and paperwork and he is good with construction toys, lego/duplo, charging around the park like a nutter, etc etc

I think there have been one or two people put off but on the whole, it has been positive. It did take a while to fill all the vacancies (added when dh registered), but it took me a while on my own to become full

I think that it can be harder for a man working on his own though. I do remember when I was looking in to childcare for my 6yo, that I looked at a nursery with a friend and there was a man working there. I thought it was a great idea and she turned around and said "what's his game?" I was so shocked that that was her attitude, she just assumed that a man can only want to work with children if there is an ulterior motive

Can't comment on the dog front but I know a lot of people have found it to be a benefit rather than getting negative responses - but remember, you can not please everyone, there will always be someone put off by a dog or cat or pet of any description

I want fish now but have no-to put a tank

HX

[Graham]

ie I am more creative and good at planning and paperwork and he is good with construction toys, lego/duplo, charging around the park like a nutter, etc etc



:laughing::laughing: That sounds familiar.

[Sharon01]

I hate to say it but in all honesty I would not send my children to a male childminder unless I had known him well as a friend perhaps, before he became a childminder. I would feel different if it was a couple working together. I hope you don't all shout at me for saying it but I would not leave my children with a single man childminding.

At the risk of upsetting a few people i do sort of agree with this comment. I would not leave one of my children with a new male childminder with no references from previous parents. We all know what has been going on with the press the last few years and how bad things have become, i mean who would have thought that letting a priest of all people have contact with your child could end up being a bad decision. However i would happily leave my child with a male childminder who has got a lot of experience and has many references, in all honestly i think there isnt enough men. Maybe the best thing would he worked with you for a bit and when he has built up a reputation then go off his own was and become a registered childminder in his own right. Its just an idea but i would happily leave my child with a new male childminder if these were the circumstances.

[Greengrass74]

At the risk of upsetting a few people i do sort of agree with this comment. I would not leave one of my children with a new male childminder with no references from previous parents. We all know what has been going on with the press the last few years and how bad things have become, i mean who would have thought that letting a priest of all people have contact with your child could end up being a bad decision. However i would happily leave my child with a male childminder who has got a lot of experience and has many references, in all honestly i think there isnt enough men. Maybe the best thing would he worked with you for a bit and when he has built up a reputation then go off his own was and become a registered childminder in his own right. Its just an idea but i would happily leave my child with a new male childminder if these were the circumstances.

I am upset by this remark, not because I am a male childminder but the fact that I believe gender is not the issue, wasn't it several woman that was involved in taking inappropriate pictures at a nursery only last year and sent to prison, plus there have been several other incidents of child abuse involving woman.

Would you leave your children with a new female childminder with no references from previous parents, if so may I ask what is the differance?

[Playmate]

I am upset by this remark, not because I am a male childminder but the fact that I believe gender is not the issue, wasn't it several woman that was involved in taking inappropriate pictures at a nursery only last year and sent to prison, plus there have been several other incidents of child abuse involving woman.

Would you leave your children with a new female childminder with no references from previous parents, if so may I ask what is the differance?

I agree Dave :D

[SamBaker]

[QUOTE=Dave;1038300]I am upset by this remark, not because I am a male childminder but the fact that I believe gender is not the issue, wasn't it several woman that was involved in taking inappropriate pictures at a nursery only last year and sent to prison, plus there have been several other incidents of child abuse involving woman.

This was just what I was thinking, I think people always think a childminder is going to be a woman the same as people always think a midwife is going to be a woman, I had a male midwife and he was fantastic much better than the female midwife I had the second time round. I would be happy for my children to go to a male childminder, I have seen some terrible behaviour from female childminders over the past couple of months. I think if you are good at your job and the children are happy in your care it doesn't matter your gender.

[catminder]

I am upset by this remark, not because I am a male childminder but the fact that I believe gender is not the issue, wasn't it several woman that was involved in taking inappropriate pictures at a nursery only last year and sent to prison, plus there have been several other incidents of child abuse involving woman.

Would you leave your children with a new female childminder with no references from previous parents, if so may I ask what is the differance?

I agree with Dave, gender would not be an issue as far as I would be concerned if I were leaving my child with a childminder - I would be looking for references/recommendations.

[Playmate]

[QUOTE=Dave;1038300]I am upset by this remark, not because I am a male childminder but the fact that I believe gender is not the issue, wasn't it several woman that was involved in taking inappropriate pictures at a nursery only last year and sent to prison, plus there have been several other incidents of child abuse involving woman.

This was just what I was thinking, I think people always think a childminder is going to be a woman the same as people always think a midwife is going to be a woman, I had a male midwife and he was fantastic much better than the female midwife I had the second time round. I would be happy for my children to go to a male childminder, I have seen some terrible behaviour from female childminders over the past couple of months. I think if you are good at your job and the children are happy in your care it doesn't matter your gender.

So true Sam, I came into minding from nursing which again is another female orienated profession. The best nurses I worked with were men. I always said I wanted a male midwife, but there wern't any where I had my children :(
like you say, some of the attitudes of female minders in my area are awful and quite honestly I would not recomend or leave my own children with many of them :angry:

[Helcatt]

Very good point Dave, and exactly what I was thinking!

HX

[Sharon01]

Dave you do make a good poin, and the fact is i haven't thought about if a female childminder has no previous experience, and I guess if i had children then i would not leave them with a female childminder who did not have any refetrences. I have never come across a male childminder, nither have i come across any men in the nursery's i know. All of my male friends and relatives would not be very good at childminding, they havent got that emotional kinda of attachment, maybe they will develop it later in life, but i would happily leave children with my male friends for say an hour but i wouldnt leave them all day every day. I know there are men out there that will be great at the job, and i do think they can do a better job than many women. Having heard the rest of the comments on here i can think of a quite a few female childminders in my area who i would never consider to look after my children if i had them.

There is a lot of predudice out there though, and i was just saying maybe it would be easier to build up a good reputation as an assistant first then go on to becoming a full child minder. This is what im having to do as I am well aware there are many parents who will not want to bring there child to me as a 23 year old, without children, no younger family, and no previous experience at working with children. Like ive said above if i was a parent i would not leave my kids with someone like me, if i was to become a childminder on my own that is. As it is i have a few people waiting for me too look after their children because i will be working alongside my mother-in-law who has about 20 years experience and turns many people away. Its just something to think about but maybe a route like this would be better for yourself.

[buildingblocks]

Sadly the society we live in still sees males as the people who would do something to a child no matter how many stories in the paper feature just women and again sadly I think this will never change. I also think people will accept a couple working together more than a male working on his own.

An interesting point from my point of view is that I have two paretns previously question why I work as a childminder when I don't have children of my own as if to say I was doing it for an ulterior motive. I also have had childminders question why I do it as well.

I do find it sad though that one of the replies saying they wouldn't leave their child with a make childminder was from someone involved in child care although I respect their right to their opinion.

[chez]

I totally believe that some parents would have a problem with a male minder but then I think you will find some parents against most things for example some will be not so keen on a minder who is overweight - will they over feed/keep up with my children, house is too big - will my child be kept an eye on, house is too small - is there room for my child, a setting that is very busy - will my child be noticed, a setting that is quiet - whats everyone else spotted, a childminder who is gay - will my child turn gay. House is too tidy, house is too messy, not enough toys, too many toys, too many older kids, pets, no pets
etc ...

In truth we all face discrimination and are sterotyped at times, but we have to be ableto show the parents that their child will be loved valued and be safe.

I would be very keen on a male minder for our children, as a gay lady I will be looking to surround my child in male role models to support them being well balanced young people.