knife and fork

[nipper]

Eight year old mindee does not seem able to hold knife and fork in the correct hands, instead preferring to hold fork in right hand, whilst using left hand to 'shovel' food onto aforementioned fork or worse still into mouth. DS 7 and DD4 looked on in disbelief when he first came to us. I'm just worried they might start to emulate him. Is it too much too expect his mum to support me or am I fighting a losing battle? I used to be a Primary school teacher and it was and still is a pet hate of mine...bad table manners. (spag bol tonight for tea...eaten one handed of course, well there's a time and place isn't there?)

[QualityCare]

I would tell him that as he does not eat using the knife you will give him a spoon and fork instead and if he wants to eat his meal he will use them and he can have a knife like the other children when he feels he is ready to use it. if he doesn't use the spoon and fork l would remove the meal.
I agree about table manners and parents should be supportive.

[ChocolateChip]

Bit of a bugbear of mine too!
You could certainly ask mum for support but at that age he really should be able to take your standards on board regardless of what happens at home.
I sometimes think I expect too much, but is it really too much to ask?
I am left handed but was still taught to use a knife and fork properly, and I can't remember not being able to use them so must have managed it at a fairly early age. (perhaps I just liked my food too much? :laughing: )
Yet nearly all of my mindees cannot use them properly, even the 12yr old I had last year would constantly drop his knife into his dinner and catapult gravy or peas all over the place :mad: What I tend to do is to just keep showing them the correct way to hold it, I don't worry too much if it's in the wrong hand but I do nag them to use their knife properly, both for cutting and scooping iykwim, and really praise those are trying.
I do sometimes wonder if the parents of today's children actually teach them any 'life skills' :rolleyes:, I know it's one of those things that doesn't matter to some but I'm afraid it's my dinner table, my standards!

[blue bear]

It does not appear important to many families now a days, I feel like I am in the minority showing children to use a knife and fork correctly.

[Pipsqueak]

Eight year old mindee does not seem able to hold knife and fork in the correct hands, instead preferring to hold fork in right hand, whilst using left hand to 'shovel' food onto aforementioned fork or worse still into mouth. DS 7 and DD4 looked on in disbelief when he first came to us. I'm just worried they might start to emulate him. Is it too much too expect his mum to support me or am I fighting a losing battle? I used to be a Primary school teacher and it was and still is a pet hate of mine...bad table manners. (spag bol tonight for tea...eaten one handed of course, well there's a time and place isn't there?)

I was not aware that there were 'correct hands' to hold a knife and fork??? I hold my knife in my right and fork in my left (I am right handed), however my right handed son and hubby hold their knife and fork the opposite way, one o f my other sons chops and changes hands, my mum and sister are left handed and one holds it opposite to me and one holds it same as me.

However - this is being unable to use a knife and fork is becoming more and more commonplace apparently with children starting school unable to use cutlery. In our school this is becoming a 'problem' and the children who CAN use the cutlery are emulating those who don't/can't - when I and other parents mentioned to school that our children were doing this - apparently they are not supposed to interfere and allow children to use their fingers and hands.... its the fast food generation.

Errmmmm , not on my watch - kids in this house WILL use cutlery appropriately if they are able oh and be taught and expected to use good manners

[mushpea]

I hold my fork in my left and my knife in my right which seems to be opposite to most people but I do manage to eat with them,, dont think it matters which hands you hold them in as long as they are used
I must admit that when my son was younger I didnt mind how he ate wether it be with spoon , knife and fork or fingers as long as he ate as he was quite fussy and a just couldnt be bothered with food, he is now nearly 11yrs and still struggles with a knife but then he has fine motor problems which is probaly why he struggles but he does try and there is no reason why your 8yr old cant try and eventyaly learn.

[Velleity]

I like my fork in my right hand :blush:

[The Juggler]

i do think it's less and less common for children to be taught to use a knife and fork properly these days especially if family meals consist mainly of pizza/chip meals and other takeaways. :(

However in mum's defence, I taught my two from a v. young age, am very strict on table manners but my dd has the worst manners, will use her fork and shovel straight to her mouth, use her fingers with the fork (same as your mindee) and general forgets everything I've ever taught her despite sanctions for doing so, missing out on treats, being sent from the table on more occasions than I can remember.

So it may just be that mums' fighting a losing battle with him (as I am :blush: :panic: )

[miffy]

i do think it's less and less common for children to be taught to use a knife and fork properly these days especially if family meals consist mainly of pizza/chip meals and other takeaways. :(


I agree with that - I think it's quite common for children to just use a fork by itself or worse, with their fingers!

Miffy xx

[Joda]

I had a school dinner today with my own kids and I was absolutely amazed how many children only used a fork to eat their hot dinner and didn't pick up their knife once.

[mandy moo]

I chop and change my cutlery round whilst Im eating too :D

As soon as my boys started weaning/eating finger foods they had the miniture version of adult spoons, knives, and forks,
My 10 yr old still tends too use his hingers eating hs food :eek: no matter how much I ask him not too.

Mum of my youngest mindee was really suprised I had mini cutlery,
I personally cant bear to see small children trying to cope/eat with huge adult cutlery.

[ChocolateChip]

Mum of my youngest mindee was really suprised I had mini cutlery,
I personally cant bear to see small children trying to cope/eat with huge adult cutlery.

I have this aswell ,the plastic ones that they start off with but I also have some child size stainless steel sets that look just like the grown up ones. I think it really helps.

[LChurch]

Sometimes there can be an underlying physical problem that means using a knife and fork properly is difficult. Sometimes to the untrained eye there doesn't look as though there is anything wrong with the child but in actual fact they may have a condition called hypermobility syndrome, this can mean joints are very loose and using a knife and fork can be difficult and sometimes even cause pain. If the child does not have anything like that then it is bad manners! I don't have a magic answer apart from perseverance to get them to use a knife and fork properly.

[mandy moo]

I have this aswell ,the plastic ones that they start off with but I also have some child size stainless steel sets that look just like the grown up ones. I think it really helps.


Yep thats what I have too :)