Help me ref 9yr old

[jamiebec2000]

Please can anyone help me,
School holidays are not my favourite times, but we all have to get on with them, saying that I have a 9 year old girl who comes on a adhoc contracr, and.she drives me potty

I can have a full day of crafts, park, trips u name it and all she does is smike and say I just want to stand near you.
Shes not shy will talk to anyone about everything, she is always repeating my setences to the other kids she tidies up before the others have finished to be helpful.

What do I do with her? How do I help her be a kid and not be attached to me and my parrot
Thanks
Becky

[Helen79]

Are all the other children younger than her? If she's genuinely wanting to help you & not just being cheeky about it then I'd make her your assistant and give her special jobs to help you out with and times that they need to be done but make it clear that those are the only jobs she needs to do and to leave the rest to you.
I can see dd being like this when she's a bit older so I've got all this to come :rolleyes:

[love381]

I agree, if she's not being cheeky and simply 'helping' with the other ones - try to get her to help in the ways you would like her to. When you go to the park, could you not say things like

'Please could you help X by showing him how to climb up the stairs for the slide' etc

Or, like has been said, make her your 'assistant' and explain that 'this is what assistants do ...'

I'm sure if she's not being cheeky, she may thrive more on being directed with the type of help you would like. x

[blue bear]

Some children find it hard to just play and self entertain. Maybe buy some cheap older children bits and bobs that you keep up on a shelf and let her have them as something special away from little ones? Give her jobs to do that help her move from your side, don't ask tell her that way she hasn't got the option to say no. Sit together and write a wish list of activities she might like so when she tries to say no you can remind her this is what you asked for. Try weaning her from needing you by her side all the time make her play with others by asking her to help x.

She needs you to help her join in to develop her social skills or she will forever be a watcher.

[Helen79]

Another idea (although this sounds like slave labour lol) is do you need any paperwork doing? things like do you need a folder of photos of all your toys and resources or labels for your toys or any posters.

I know that dd would love the responsibility of taking photos of all the toys, printing them out and making a photo album. Or you could ask her to make a photo album for the setting over the summer holidays and ask her to be in charge of taking all the photos on outings and making an album throughout the whole holidays. Then she feels like she's helping you and is doing something fun too.

Would she like to write a small book of short stories for the younger children that she could then read to them at story time or be in charge of doing a music and movement activity.

Just trying to think of things that my dd would like to do to help out.

[alwaysright]

i'd just roll with it, and take advantage-of the help i mean!! my daughter is nine, the oldest here during school holidays as my after schoolies are all term time, she likes to "help" so i let her do things like, get me a nappy please, pass the wipes, can you get this this and this for me, why dont you read to xx, she loves being able to help, it stops her getting bored and so improves her behaviour, but she does whittle on for england so i just say mmmm and oh yeah in the right places :)

just to add getting to this she also repeats everything i say to the lo's but sees herself as grown up compared to the others and this is how she enjoys her day with us, i think its a girl thing so maybe thats what yours would like??

[jamiebec2000]

Thanks for the advice,

I think i like the job idea, i have been meaning to take photos of the toys int he boxes etc so i'm guessing she might like to do that, as and when she likes, (she tends to get bored quickly), the only trouble i have is she is very bossy so to ask her to set up a game and help me in that way creates arguments because she has to be right and telling people what to do something my 6 yr old struggles with lol

Im also going to get a list for her to fill in what she wants to do while shes here see if i have missed something

I guess im also going to have to get used to it, my 12 yr old just disappears and comes down when shes either told to do something or she wants something lol

Thanks a lot for your help
Enjoy the rest of ur hols