lau
01-07-2011, 09:30 PM
Sorry everyone, this might be a long one! :(
I have 3 part time mindees under 5 and 10 year old and 11 month old sons. I havent had any problems really with my first 2 mindees but am having major issues with the third who started about 3 weeks ago.
He is 15 months old and suffers from severe seperation anxiety. Its not particularly related to just his mum as we are still at the stage where as soon as I start to stand up, even if its just to pick something up then X starts crying.
He doesnt sleep in a cot as he still co-sleeps with mum, he will only sleep in a pram in front of the TV, when out walking in pram or being cuddled to sleep. I did say that all the other mindees sleep in the cot when they came for a visit and so I have tried him in the cot for 2 weeks but he just cries for as long as I leave him.
He didnt have much of a settling in as mum started her new job days after signing contracts so he only had one session. Then he is here for 10 hour days on some days (he only comes 3 days a week). I have tried all sorts to try and settle him and have also had some problems with the dad and his expectations of the service I can provide (this was made at a phonecall to me at 9pm on a friday night!)
Anyway, my baby boy who has always been very independent and confident and has never had problems with me holding other babies or socialising with children himself, has started to develop severe seperation anxiety himself and now cries and races to get to me before X if he hears him cry. He is clingy, seems to have lost his smiles and cries every time I put him down whether there are other children there or not. This has developed since taking X on.
I just dont know what to do, every day I have X is now very stressful as my son and X spend most of the day whinging/crying and fighting over me. My baby is now unhappy and I feel so bad.
I am considering getting in touch with the local vacancy co-ordinator to see whether any other minder in the area has the availability and maybe less mindees before I speak to the parents (they are aware of the issues we are having) as I just feel like it is not fair to be putting my own children in a position where they feel insecure but I also dont want to give up on X or send him somewhere else when he has just got to know me. There are also financial implications which I know shouldnt come into it.
I am getting quite down thinking about this and could just do with some advice before I take my next step.
Sorry its so long, but this was the sort version!!
:panic:
I have 3 part time mindees under 5 and 10 year old and 11 month old sons. I havent had any problems really with my first 2 mindees but am having major issues with the third who started about 3 weeks ago.
He is 15 months old and suffers from severe seperation anxiety. Its not particularly related to just his mum as we are still at the stage where as soon as I start to stand up, even if its just to pick something up then X starts crying.
He doesnt sleep in a cot as he still co-sleeps with mum, he will only sleep in a pram in front of the TV, when out walking in pram or being cuddled to sleep. I did say that all the other mindees sleep in the cot when they came for a visit and so I have tried him in the cot for 2 weeks but he just cries for as long as I leave him.
He didnt have much of a settling in as mum started her new job days after signing contracts so he only had one session. Then he is here for 10 hour days on some days (he only comes 3 days a week). I have tried all sorts to try and settle him and have also had some problems with the dad and his expectations of the service I can provide (this was made at a phonecall to me at 9pm on a friday night!)
Anyway, my baby boy who has always been very independent and confident and has never had problems with me holding other babies or socialising with children himself, has started to develop severe seperation anxiety himself and now cries and races to get to me before X if he hears him cry. He is clingy, seems to have lost his smiles and cries every time I put him down whether there are other children there or not. This has developed since taking X on.
I just dont know what to do, every day I have X is now very stressful as my son and X spend most of the day whinging/crying and fighting over me. My baby is now unhappy and I feel so bad.
I am considering getting in touch with the local vacancy co-ordinator to see whether any other minder in the area has the availability and maybe less mindees before I speak to the parents (they are aware of the issues we are having) as I just feel like it is not fair to be putting my own children in a position where they feel insecure but I also dont want to give up on X or send him somewhere else when he has just got to know me. There are also financial implications which I know shouldnt come into it.
I am getting quite down thinking about this and could just do with some advice before I take my next step.
Sorry its so long, but this was the sort version!!
:panic: