How to balance time for your own kids

[smurfette]

Hi all! Am new to this forum and to Childminding and thank you browsing has been SO helpful!!

I am really impressed with how you all seem to be balancing so many kids - I have two mindees a 7 month old (ft) and an 18 month old (3 days a week) and find when my three come home from school it's just mental with homework getting ready for after school activities making dinner etc and I find it quite stressful. I suppose the 18 month old makes things difficult as she is whingy and demanding and won't just play while I get homework done. My girls love the little ones around and make a fuss of them but have noticed my 5 year old has been very attention seeking, crying loudly over every little bump,'slight etc.

So my question is how do you cope if you have kids of your own? Do you leave homework until after mindees are gone home, sent yours upstairs to get it done, and how do you make sure your own get enough attention? Obviously at the weekend they get undivided attention but would love some tips on during the week!

Also how do you all fit all those kids in? Are they allowed upstairs? We have a big sitting room/dining room and a playroom but doesn't feel enough!

[marnieb]

Hiya,

The easiest way to stop me getting so stressed with it all is to be organisied!!! While my mindees nap in the afteernoon, I get tea ready for my kids and quickly tidy up. I delegate my oldest (he's almost 8) a few easy jobs, but I wouldnt dream of doing homework until mindees have gone or the weekends, as I want my kids to feel like they're getting my undivided attention with that!

It does take a few weeks for it all to slot in, so dont worry and dont panic!!!

[sarah707]

It will take you a while to find a rhythm to the days so don't worry... also your dd will realise that she can share mummy, it's early days for her too.

No one child needs your full attention 100% of the time... children need to go off and play and be independent.

So when they are busy you can spread yourself amongst the others.

We read books with schoolies while little ones are having bottles or playing quietly on the floor... we prepare food when children are busy or sleeping and we involve older ones in the kitchen.

It will come together as you do it more :D

[AliceK]

It's difficult isn't it. You get to spend more time with your own children than if you were working away from the home but in my opinion it's not quality time. My DD is not too bad she's only 3 and so after she comes home from nursery at lunchtime she slots into playing with the other LO's quite nicely. However I do feel bad about DS who's 7 and has homework to do. I have 2 after schoolies and tea to get ready for between 4 and 6 children so he has to wait until I've finished working for me to sit with him and help with homework. Take into account that my own children also need bathing etc after work and they are usually in bed by 7.15pm it's all a bit rushed and at that time of day I'm tired and they never get the best of me :(

I do let one of the after schoolies upstairs with my DS if DS wants to as I know I can trust them and they have to leave the bedroom door open so that I can hear what's going on.

Good luck. You will get into a routine after a while but tbh it's after school that I find the hardest, busiest and most stressful time.

xxxxx

[JCrakers]

Its hard at first until you get into a routine. My dd was 5yrs when I started and I went throught a bad patch of behaviour with her but after a few weeks was fine. I made sure i included her as I sometimes felt guilty about giving her attention over mindees but realised she needed it too.

I always made sure they got all my time at he weekend so I did my housework on Friday night so I didnt have to do it at the weekend. Now they are a bit older they dont need me as much (9 and 12)

I always leave homework until after I finish work at 6pm. Usually I cook dinner while they sit at the breakfast bar, then if they need any help or support i'm right there.
I dont allow mindees upstairs as at the end of the day its my home and like to keep it seperate. I have a playroom and dining room. The older ones can use the lounge if they use it properly for TV and wii (no bouncing on sofa, running about etc) otherwise theyre out of there....:D
Hope you find a good routine soon...it will come

Becky

[The Juggler]

I've never really tried to do homework wiht my kids until after the mindees leave. However, mine are bigger now and if they are happy to and want to get it out of the way whilst I'm still working and ask me the odd question = they do.

I used to do dinners but now I don't and that is much less stressful for me as I can speak to my childrne, play with the babies without the stress of cooking and trying to keep littlies entertained and feeding everyone before hometime.:)

[grindal]

I think its also worth reminding yourself what things would be like if you were doing an outside the home "normal" style job.

There are things about childminding that get to me - but in the long run I see far more of my children than I would do if I went back to my old career.

[smurfette]

Hia

Thank you all you have made me feel better, it's nice to know I am not alone! My problem is my kids have after school activities on 3 days that start at 6 so they need to be fed first and homework would be too late when they come home. Think I do need to be more organised about dinner tho think I will invest in a slow cooker! And we bought the girls desks for their bedrooms so hope they can go up and get homework done in the quiet! We just heard also they got a place in a different school in september so while it will be a longer afternoon cos they finish earlier it will give us more time to get everything done! Will just calm down until i find my feet (girls finish school this week so no more homework yay!!) thanks all love this site you are all so helpful!