View Full Version : Help! 10yr Old stealing from my home!

10-06-2011, 03:01 PM
Hello, I've just joined because I've not encountered anything like this before and I need help from some one.

I've been taking care of two girls, one 4 and one 10 since October last year. They are from a single parent family and I take care of them about 50 hours a week.

If you had asked me a month ago what they were like I would have said both of them are very bright, well behaved, I never even needed to give either of them a time out. Then about a month ago the 10 year old started lying, compulsively. About everything, I had a chat with her and thought she understood and that she'd stopped but she hasn't she still lies about everything and she catches herself out. I've spoken to her mother about it and she's spoken to her about it as well but nothing has changed and in my opinion she hasn't really felt any consequences for her actions.

Then the last week or two I noticed a few things missing from my house, make up mostly, perfumes and nail varnishes and stuff and then all of a sudden they ended up at their house. I gave her an opportunity to come clean to me and tell me what she took but she still denied it. She denied it down to the ground swore that her friends had given them to her. Then she tried to blame her little sister saying that she'd found them and given them to her. The little one wouldn't take anything, if she found even a penny in the couch she'd come running into me saying she found my money. Finally the 10 year old admitted to taking some of it but not all of it, the lies are continuing and now she's stealing my stuff. I've told her mother about it and I still don't see any consequences, still has her phone, her laptop and her ds, and is going on a sleepover tonight. Crocodile tears appear every time I bring it up with her and then she's bouncing off singing and dancing.

What should I do? It's actually tearing me up because I don't know whats changed with her. I don't trust her in my home any more, I don't believe a word that comes out of her mouth. She shows absolutely no understanding or remorse for what she's done. Her mother doesn't seem to want to do anything about it. I would find another family to work for but I don't want to leave their mother high and dry (she's a friend) and well bottom line I do care about the kids and I feel like if she doesn't learn from this its just going get worse and worse.

Help any one?

10-06-2011, 07:05 PM
Hate to say it hun but if the mum is not dealing with this then she's no friend :mad:

Have there been any problems at home or school? Although that is no excuse for this behaviour but it might give you something to work on.
Think you need to get mum in for a chat and make her see how serious this is, unless she is prepared to help sort it I would give notice.
I know it's a hard decision but you can't carry on not being able to trust this child, it's not fair on anyone.

10-06-2011, 07:12 PM
Children sometimes steal items from people they envy, could this little girl envy your family life? They just want a piece of what the other person has no matter how tiny, this is from a personal experience sadly.

10-06-2011, 07:25 PM
my own stepson and stepdaughter stole from me he stole money she stole makeup from my online business stock...absolutely gut wrenching.....im sorry you are going through this but until the mumdoes anything it will probably carry on...perhaps say to mum unles it stops she will have to find care for the elder one elsewhere...why shsould you have to put up with it!!