PDA

View Full Version : Teenage son is ill - should I close?



Cazz
03-04-2011, 09:51 PM
My 13 year old son has just been sick after feeling unwell during the evening.

Obviously he is old enough to be able to stay in his bedroom out of the way of mindees but should I close anyway? I don't work on Mondays so tomorrow's not an issue but my illness policy is 48 hours for upset stomachs - so that would take me up to Wednesday (as long as he's not sick tomorrow) - so I'm thinking ahead to Tuesday.

As I say, he could stay out of the way but obviously I would need to keep checking on him and if he was sick again then I would probably have to assist him. (If his twin sister gets the tummy bug she would be in a right state if she was sick and would definetly need me).

My mindees are very young - 8 mths, 22 mths, 3 on Weds and my dd who is 3. I've also got a 5 year old this week who has already broken up from school. Obviously I shouldn't be leaving them unattended if I go upstairs to my son so is it best to tell all parents tomorrow that I will have to close on Tuesday?

Personally I wouldn't want my child to go into a home where there is a tummy bug but I know not all parents think this way and some have difficulties if they do not have their child care available.

If it was my 3 year old I wouldn't definitely close but I would like some opinions with regards to older children and illness.

Trouble
03-04-2011, 09:53 PM
i would yes :thumbsup:

big hugs hope he gets better soon xxxx

wendywu
03-04-2011, 10:26 PM
I would see how tomorrow goes as at 13 he does not need you quite so much and he may have got most of it out of his system :thumbsup:

Cazz
03-04-2011, 10:28 PM
Thanks.

I was thinking that I should close but if it passes one-by-one to the other 4 family members then I could potentially be closed a lot over the next couple of weeks and then I worry about causing problems for the families. :(

Cazz
03-04-2011, 10:28 PM
I would see how tomorrow goes as at 13 he does not need you quite so much and he may have got most of it out of his system :thumbsup:

So it's not a definite requirement that we close for 48 hours if there's a sickness bug in the house?

RainbowMum
03-04-2011, 10:41 PM
Personally I would be contacting parents to let them know & giving them the option to bring children or not. I would state that i would not charge if they choose not to bring their child as technically I should be closed - if they decide to send their child and the child catches the bug then their child will be subject to the 48 hour exclusion rule. If I or my younger child comes down with it - the setting will be closed.

This way they have an element of choice xx

rickysmiths
03-04-2011, 10:51 PM
This happened with my dd. She was sick on Monday morning a couple of weeks ago. I closed on Mon and Tues and found an alternative cm for the parents. I was then ill on Tues and Wed but not S & D just felt very sick and had a headache, ds got it on Wed and was off 2 days so i was closed for 4 days.

Its one of those things. Thank goodness it does happen very often. As I expect parents to keep their los away for 48hrs, I do them the curtesy of closing for 48hrs if there is sickness in my family.

wendywu
03-04-2011, 11:19 PM
I would give parents the choice to send their children or not.

I think it is different when a small child is ill than a teenager who can keep to his room.

Cazz
03-04-2011, 11:20 PM
This happened with my dd. She was sick on Monday morning a couple of weeks ago. I closed on Mon and Tues and found an alternative cm for the parents. I was then ill on Tues and Wed but not S & D just felt very sick and had a headache, ds got it on Wed and was off 2 days so i was closed for 4 days.

Its one of those things. Thank goodness it does happen very often. As I expect parents to keep their los away for 48hrs, I do them the curtesy of closing for 48hrs if there is sickness in my family.

This is the way I think - I wouldn't be happy if they didn't stick to the 48 hour exclusion so I should lead by example. But then as I say, I feel bad for letting so many people down :rolleyes:

The other thing is if I had to go upstairs to my ill teenager and, god forbid, something happened with one of the mindees I would be in trouble with Ofsted for leaving them unattended.

wendywu
03-04-2011, 11:22 PM
I suppose if you can find another CM who has spaces to take the children it would be a great help and stop you feeling guilty. :)

Cazz
03-04-2011, 11:28 PM
I suppose if you can find another CM who has spaces to take the children it would be a great help and stop you feeling guilty. :)

Not a chance of that as the younger 3 are from the same family and I know there are no other childminders who have all their early years spaces available (I have a variation to take them).

So in theory if I had to close I would only be affecting 2 families - the 5 year old shouldn't really be a problem because his grandmother lives 3 doors away from him and collects him from my home to hers until his mum gets in from work anyway.

The other family with the 3 children has a mum at college and she does seem to be able to take time off when needed (plus she has family members close by).

Heaven Scent
04-04-2011, 12:27 AM
Has your son been ill just once or a few time and when was it? - When I was a teen and in my early 20's I would often eat something that just didn't agree with me and so I would be sick but just once - are you sure its a tummy bug or has he just had a reaction to something he's either eaten or drunk or if he takes a vitamin supplement that could have upset his tummy. - I was often sick from fizzy drinks or chips, crisps, peanuts, raw peppers, mars bars, certain cakes or vitamin tablets sometimes it was the iron in them and other times it was the coating that would do it. Sometimes it would happen because I'd eaten when I was tired and others because I'd got too hungry before stopping to eat - there was no set pattern to what it was that would set it off and so it took me a long time to make the connection with the individual items on the above list - I'm not like that now - I can eat almost everything and it shows - so keep an eye on him and if he hasn't got a temp or stomach pain and isn't sick again then don't jump to the conclusion that he is carrying a virus that he can pass on. My 15 year old son is going through it a bit now.

Weigh up what he's eaten the the previous hours before he was ill - if it was high in fat or sugar it could just be that. - just another thought - he's not experimented with booze has he???

moogster1a
04-04-2011, 07:25 AM
Why would you need to attend to him? Unless he's SN he'll be more than capable of taking himself to the loo to throw up then crawling back to bed again!
( maybe he has really long hair that needs holding back by you?!)
Personally, I'd open and tell him to stay in his sick bed out of the way.

Pipsqueak
04-04-2011, 09:06 AM
Why would you need to attend to him? Unless he's SN he'll be more than capable of taking himself to the loo to throw up then crawling back to bed again!
( maybe he has really long hair that needs holding back by you?!)
Personally, I'd open and tell him to stay in his sick bed out of the way.

what a funny reply! even my 13yr old needs a bit of TLC when they are ill. as a mum that is my responsibility and just because they reach a certain age doesn't mean that I don't need to attend to them if they are ill.

I agree that in general the older the child the more capable they are of 'looking after themselves' and staying out the way but there are probably points during the day they are going to want to come downstairs - not least for a bit of human interaction and company.

Not sure about the comment about the hair.... very bizarre.:huh:

Cazz
04-04-2011, 09:17 AM
Why would you need to attend to him? Unless he's SN he'll be more than capable of taking himself to the loo to throw up then crawling back to bed again!
( maybe he has really long hair that needs holding back by you?!)
Personally, I'd open and tell him to stay in his sick bed out of the way.

Well I think that's a bit harsh!

Despite the fact that he's 13, if he's ill then I'm his mum and I want to care for him and make sure he's okay. I think they call it being compassionate!!

As much as anything I was taking into account the well being of my mindees when asking this question - I'm not going to leave 4 very young children unattended downstairs if I have to be upstairs.

Assuming that you have children of your own I hope that they're in good health and don't get sick very often as your beside manner is obviously very different from mine!

NI MINDER
04-04-2011, 09:21 AM
A sick 13 year old probably does need a bit of mummy's tlc - they think they are all grown up at that age until they are sick and then they regress to needing more of mums sympathy that they would like to admit to .
Hope your day goes well and that he soon feels better

Cazz
04-04-2011, 09:22 AM
Has your son been ill just once or a few time and when was it? - When I was a teen and in my early 20's I would often eat something that just didn't agree with me and so I would be sick but just once - are you sure its a tummy bug or has he just had a reaction to something he's either eaten or drunk or if he takes a vitamin supplement that could have upset his tummy. - I was often sick from fizzy drinks or chips, crisps, peanuts, raw peppers, mars bars, certain cakes or vitamin tablets sometimes it was the iron in them and other times it was the coating that would do it. Sometimes it would happen because I'd eaten when I was tired and others because I'd got too hungry before stopping to eat - there was no set pattern to what it was that would set it off and so it took me a long time to make the connection with the individual items on the above list - I'm not like that now - I can eat almost everything and it shows - so keep an eye on him and if he hasn't got a temp or stomach pain and isn't sick again then don't jump to the conclusion that he is carrying a virus that he can pass on. My 15 year old son is going through it a bit now.

Weigh up what he's eaten the the previous hours before he was ill - if it was high in fat or sugar it could just be that. - just another thought - he's not experimented with booze has he???

Thanks for your much kinder reply!

He's been with me all weekend so I know that he's not been experimenting with booze!

He hasn't had anything different to eat - in fact he's had very little all weekend which is most unusual for him. He wasn't hungry on Saturday and didn't eat much and then Sunday night he was sick so I think it is a bug that was coming on gradually.

He's not being sick now but has the most awful tummy cramps - can't even sit up straight. He's also as white as a sheet and just lying in bed which again is not like him.

He won't be going to school tomorrow - unlike some parents I will keep him off for the regulatory 48 hours - so I'll be phoning my parents shortly.

Fingers crossed no-one else comes down with it!

keatingschick
04-04-2011, 09:53 AM
Personally I would be contacting parents to let them know & giving them the option to bring children or not. I would state that i would not charge if they choose not to bring their child as technically I should be closed - if they decide to send their child and the child catches the bug then their child will be subject to the 48 hour exclusion rule. If I or my younger child comes down with it - the setting will be closed.

This way they have an element of choice xx

Depending on how ill your son feels and how much he would need you - my own daughter is 12 and she is the worlds worst patient and if she is sick the world and its mother has to get involved, but I know a friend whose daughter is the opposite and doesnt want anyone around when she is feeling sick, just wants to deal with it and be left alone.

I have kept my children off school and upstairs out of the way, but given the parents notice and given them the choice - I PERSONALLY also wouldnt want my child going to a house where there is a sickness bug, much the same as I dont like them bringing their children here when they are ill and putting me and my family at risk, so I'd give them the choice, letting them know that obviously I will do as much to minimise risk of any chance of catching the bug, BUT point out that if their child does get ill then they will be excluded for 48 hours.

Then the ball is in their court. Personally this is one of the aspects of this job that I hate.

Trouble
04-04-2011, 09:54 AM
i had a 17 year old who was crying with tonsilitus, he might be a tough 17 normally but there are kids:idea: who need us end off!!!!!

hope you son is feeling a little better today ?

Cazz
04-04-2011, 10:00 AM
Depending on how ill your son feels and how much he would need you - my own daughter is 12 and she is the worlds worst patient and if she is sick the world and its mother has to get involved, but I know a friend whose daughter is the opposite and doesnt want anyone around when she is feeling sick, just wants to deal with it and be left alone.

I have kept my children off school and upstairs out of the way, but given the parents notice and given them the choice - I PERSONALLY also wouldnt want my child going to a house where there is a sickness bug, much the same as I dont like them bringing their children here when they are ill and putting me and my family at risk, so I'd give them the choice, letting them know that obviously I will do as much to minimise risk of any chance of catching the bug, BUT point out that if their child does get ill then they will be excluded for 48 hours.

Then the ball is in their court. Personally this is one of the aspects of this job that I hate.

Me too! You think it's an ideal job in the sense that you're at home if your child is ill but then you have the guilt of having to let others down!

I've decided to do this - I've already phoned the mum of the three little ones and they're not coming tomorrow. I'm about to phone the mum of the 5 year old and leave it up to her explaining the situation as you've said.

At least I have nice parents that seem to be understanding in these circumstances.

Cazz
04-04-2011, 10:03 AM
i had a 17 year old who was crying with tonsilitus, he might be a tough 17 normally but there are kids:idea: who need us end off!!!!!

hope you son is feeling a little better today ?

My 18 year old nephew gets tonsillitus fairly regulary and it knocks him for six. He's normally a lad that carries on regardless but not with this. Despite that fact the doctor still doesn't see it as enough of a problem to remove his tonsils :angry:

My son is still feeling quite poorly but at least he's not being sick now - thanks for asking x

Pipsqueak
04-04-2011, 10:10 AM
i had a 17 year old who was crying with tonsilitus, he might be a tough 17 normally but there are kids:idea: who need us end off!!!!!

hope you son is feeling a little better today ?

My 10yr old suffers badly with tonsilltus and there is no way I can just shove him upstairs - he needs reassurance and cuddles poor kid.

Trouble
04-04-2011, 10:21 AM
My 18 year old nephew gets tonsillitus fairly regulary and it knocks him for six. He's normally a lad that carries on regardless but not with this. Despite that fact the doctor still doesn't see it as enough of a problem to remove his tonsils :angry:

My son is still feeling quite poorly but at least he's not being sick now - thanks for asking x

dont forget sips of water :thumbsup: :thumbsup: if he stops being sick for a long period of time give him a packet of salt crisps to put the salt back hes lost and some flat pop for sugar thats what the hospital recommended for my dd

big hugs

Mollymop
04-04-2011, 10:32 AM
When my children are ill I give the parents the choice most of them have been fine with their children still attending. But not with S and D - as I need to be with them looking after them, can't do 2 jobs at once.
My ds is 12 and when he was ill last week - under the weather, virus, - he stayed upstairs out of the way and I still worked. I also gave him the choice of having the children here and he was ok with that.
He was right as rain by the afternoon. If he was vomiting I would close, becasue I find even teenages need their mum's when they are very poorly after all they are still children. Hope he is feeling better?