Pushing the boundaries

[claireLouise]

Hi Guys,

I need some more advice.

Before I am registered and start advertising my places, I really need to find ways to deal with my oldest son. He is at school but only turned 5 in January. At the moment he is trying to see how far he can bend the house rules and push back my boundaries; e.g. running away from me on the way to school, refusing to each his meals, refusing to tidying up and generally being cheeky.

I have tried both punishment; being sent to the quiet area to think, being sent to bed and positive reinforcement e.g. treats after dinner if he is good or chosing what is on the tv. But nothing is working.

How do you deal with this time of unacceptable behaviour?

Look forward to your advice.

Best Wishes

Claire

[Twinkles]

I would choose one form of discipline and stick to it. What does he especially like doing if it's tv,and he's naughty no tv for the rest of the day.
Or take away a toy each time he's naughty and make him earn them back by good behaviour.
Sounds like you are doing all the right things just be consistant.
And keep on with the good behaviour rewards. Especially when he's not expecting it. Don't just say if you're good you can have/do this. But when he's playing nicely or is sharing well praise him up to the hilt.

Good luck :thumbsup:

[sarah707]

Like Twinkles says - a lot of it is consistency. I know at that age my 2 pushed the boundaries - they still do, just in different ways. Now though they mostly know how far to push - they do eventually learn! :D

[Tickles]

Hi Claire,
Just spotted your location when looking at posts, where about in murieston are you?, i too am in murieston [ pick ups at williamston]

[devoncm]

my oldest whos 8 next month constantly pushes bounries esp with meals, now if she does not eat it as half the time lately she just looks at it, i keep it in microwave for the next day, if on the next day she still not eating it i will keep it for breakfast the following day and she gets no treats or snacks between meals-thankfully i havent had to do it at breakfast yet as she has finally after an hour the second night when its cold and yuk again she has got it eaten

[SimplyLucy]

I used to be a right fuss with my first child about eating. Really used to panic if he didn't eat a meal, guess I thought he was going to starve!

However now I'm on child number 4 (my final one!) I'm a lot more laid back. Child 4 is an amazing fussy eater, I just ignore it! I put the same meal in front of him as everyone else in the family and if he chooses not to eat it then so be it.

About 6 months ago I was lucky if he ate 1 or 2 evening meals during a week, now he'll probably eat 3 or 4.

He knows there is no pudding until he's eaten his main course, and never moans when the other children get theirs.

I also have a rule in my house that when children "think" they have had enough they have to have their age in fork fulls/bites! My youngest son is 4 so he has to have 4 more forks fulls.........works so well.

My eldest is 9 now and thinks it's a little unfair that he has to have 9 more fork fulls as it always means he has to finish........bless him. :littleangel:

I have these rules for mindees too, even their mum has taken my age:fork full rule!

Hope this helps a little, good luck.

[claireLouise]

Thanks everyone. It has reassured me that this is a typical problem. I will remember to stay consistent and I do like the age:folk rule.

Best Wishes

Claire:)