Heartbroken, Ofsted been, had a complaint made about me

[Gigglemonsters]

Hi don't normally post but really unsure what to do. I had an impromptu visit this morning from an Ofsted Lady. A complaint had been made against me! I should explain I'm not a newbie I'll have been childminding 11 years in March & I've never had one made before so I am really upset,

The complaint is that I've been using my own eldest children to pick up a 6 yr old from a 2nd school whilst I'm picking up 4 others from another school, one day a week. I hasten to add that I have full parental permission for this & honestly didn't think I was breaking any rule. My children in question are 12 & 15 years old & I have minded this child for the last 3 years so they no each other pretty well. The 6 year old is a very calm & sensible one & mum & i both agreed that we thought they would be pefectly safe walking the whole 5 mins to my house. My children also attended this same Primary school & so are very familar with the staff should a problem arise. They also always carry their mobile phones to contact me immediately.

I accept that I've been breaking the rules without realising & instantly rectified the situation (Thursday being the one day a week it happens) but its Ofsteds nxt step I need help with please. Apparently it has to listed as an Action which i have to respond to in writing fair enough) but it will also be logged online for the next 5 years & will read something like;


"Left a minded child unsupervised with an unapproved person under the age of 18 years"

No one will touch me - they might as well just de-register me! Sounds so bad. I genuinely didn't know I was breaking a rule, seems so harsh. To make matters worse I'm just about to start an assistant (awaiting crb) & am now thinking whats the point?

Any guidance greatly appreciated please

[sarah707]

I have sent you a personal message. x

[PixiePetal]

sorry, I have no words of wisdom and have recently gone through my own troubles work wise. Sarah707 is a great help for CM in distress :) - please don't despair - I am sure things will sort and you will be able to move on. If I can, after the past few weeks, anyone can :o

x hugs x

[ajs]

oh hon try not to worry ,easier said than done but i do know how you're feeling.
hopefully it won't be the end of your business I for one have never ever had a parent read my report before booking me and after you're looking after their child you can explain why it reads like that if they ever ask.

[caz3007]

I am so sorry this has happened. A minder near to me has done the same, she allowed her older son to collect a mindee with parents permission and also leave them together whilst she popped out, so she obviously thought the same as you, that its ok. She doesnt do it now as her son is now working. Just to say you arent the only one.

Hugs to you xxxx

[jumpinjen]

I would second that most parents visit first before you give report to read and you can then explain the note on your report, could you ask mum to write a letter backing that up to keep with your references and thankyou cards, nice comments etc, so that you can show both to parents..... I honestly wouldn't let it put me off someone if i felt good about them as a person and the home they lived in. you did what you thought best at the time, and mum was happy, it was an unfortunate decision and you must feel awful right now but pick yourself up and give yourself time to let it all sink in and think through it before you make any big decisions, I'm sure that your families would want you to carry on,

Bug hugs, jen x

[Mookins]

am gutted for you hun...but dont despair...ofsted have a way with words to make you feel awful

xxx

[The Juggler]

big hugs hon. I have an ex-mum complaining to ofsted about her now ex-minder leaving her children with her dh without her permission and without her having any knowledge that he was her assistant. Even when she then told her, she was not asked if it was ok to leave her children with him.

Ofsted came and wrote off the complaint. It's so unfair :( I agree that lots of parents don't read the reports before visiting so you could tell them exactly what happened and I'm sure most would be fine. The wording tells a very different story to what actually happened, even though it was against the rules.:)

[Tinglesnark]

Oh how awful :( I hope that you will be ok, try not to let the panic overcome you thoug - there has to be a way around it?
x

[pinky33]

I'm sending you the BIGGEST FATEST cyber hug.
Been through this ourselves the past few weeks you will be ok don't give up xxxx

if you need anything any advice please send me a message your not alone xx

[zillervalley]

ahh things seem very dull at the moment for you but it will work out

you have the years that you havent had a compaint to make things seem brighter for you

as others have said mums dont normally read your report till the visit, so you can expain

good advice given already about having a letter from the mindees parent to back up your story

i see you are new to the forum, welcome :clapping: :clapping: you have lots of friends now

hugs
ziller

[Gigglemonsters]

Thanks for the support girls, have just spoken to the mum concerned & she's going to write a letter to support me. I'm going to fight this, a warning would've been sufficient. All the changes they've made over the last few years - you miss one & your black marked for 5 years, no wonder 10 childminders are quitting every day in the UK currently :eek:

[miffy]

Don't beat yourself up - you've made a mistake, that's all.

I agree the wording's dreadful but also that parents don't read reports. What really matters is the children being happy in your care. Chin up, you will get through this.

Miffy xx

[sarah707]

If other childminders reading this thread are concerned then please can I suggest...

If you are using under 18s or unregistered people to bring children to your house stop what you are doing immediately. If it is a private arrangement between a parent and their friend then that is fine... but if it is an unregistered member of your family then it is not fine;

Speak to Ofsted about exactly what is / is not legal to cover your personal situation;

Consider registering your partner / over 18 as an assistant... which will include them having to do a first aid course if they are going to be left on their own with children;

Speak to parents tomorrow and explain that there is a problem and they need to make alternative private arrangements to get their child to your house until the situation is clarified;

Check the legalities of your personal situation with your insurance company.

Thank you.

[jane5]

I have no advice but want to send you big hugs:group hug:

[Merry-Minder]

How terrible!!

As already said I usually give my parents a copy of my Ofsted report to leave with after our first meeting, so I would just be honest and flag it up, and then once youve explained im sure they will realise how the wording blows it out of porportion! The idea of a reference and thank you cards to back you up is also an excellent idea!

Big hugs and I hope you get this sorted:) xxx

[glitzygal]

OH gigglemonster, dont stop giggling,,,

keep your head up high, like you said why cant ofsted give you an action to change they way you do it, instead putting it on report for 5 years, its not that bad, especialy with written permission from mum,,,, well hope its sorts itself out,

all i would say is new parents will respect you being honest, could you make a policy about the new changes your going to do, then they see it for themselves,,,

good luck x

[button68]

OMG a local CM gets her daughter, age 19 but not registered as her assistant, to collect 2 children from one school, whilst she goes to another :eek:

I never thought for one moment that anything was wrong with this.

[Penny1959]

OH gigglemonster, dont stop giggling,,,

keep your head up high, like you said why cant ofsted give you an action to change they way you do it, instead putting it on report for 5 years, its not that bad, especialy with written permission from mum,,,, well hope its sorts itself out,

all i would say is new parents will respect you being honest, could you make a policy about the new changes your going to do, then they see it for themselves,,,

good luck x

I recently had a parent put in a complaint to me - was really about not want to pay notice money and Ofsted not interested as parent did not complain to them
HOWEVER Ofsted reminded me that I have to store this 'complaint' and make all current and prospective parents aware of it and my investigation and outcome.

I was really worried about this BUT when telling current parents and THREE sets of new parents (2 of whom have now placed their children in my care) ALL said words to the effect of 'How Silly' and 'Thank you for being honest and telling us'

So as others have said although very distressing and worrying most parents will go with their gut feeling about you and will respect your honestly.


Hugs

Penny :)

[mrs robbie williams]

If other childminders reading this thread are concerned then please can I suggest...

If you are using under 18s or unregistered people to bring children to your house stop what you are doing immediately. If it is a private arrangement between a parent and their friend then that is fine... but if it is an unregistered member of your family then it is not fine;

Speak to Ofsted about exactly what is / is not legal to cover your personal situation;

Consider registering your partner / over 18 as an assistant... which will include them having to do a first aid course if they are going to be left on their own with children;

Speak to parents tomorrow and explain that there is a problem and they need to make alternative private arrangements to get their child to your house until the situation is clarified;

Check the legalities of your personal situation with your insurance company.

Thank you.

thanks sarah xx

[mushpea]

how awful for you,,, i am sure when you explain the situation to prospective parents they would understand,,,

[angiemog]

Yes you will get into trouble for using someone unregistered. My husband is registered as my assistant but I still can't leave mindees with him. They have to be registered as an assistant and have first aid, even if it is just for a few minutes. (my hubbie doesn't have first aid) If I am wrong I'm sure someone will correct me. x

[Pauline]

Yes you will. My husband is registered as my assistant but I still can't leave mindees with him. They have to be registered as an assistant and have first aid, even if it is just for a few minutes. (my hubbie doesn't have first aid) If I am wrong I'm sure someone will correct me. x

You are correct Angie.

You should stop immediately Helen, even with parents permission it is not allowed, as Gigglemonster has found out. It can also invalidate your insurance. :(

[manjay]

I have something like this going on near me at the moment. I have informed my Network Coordiantor as to me it is very obviously wrong. Children should only be with the registered person (or assistant if applicable) unless in an emergency.

I am sorry for all the stress this is putting you through Gigglemonsters and as others have said if you be upfront with prospective parents then they will probably think it is silly. On the other hand I think you also have to prepare yourself for the fact that some parents (probably a very small minority) may see it as you not being aware of current rules and regulations.

[the happy house]

Yes, you have to stop doing this. You cannot leave children unsupervised with anyone under 18 - and anyone you leave them with has to approved by ofsted (a crb isn't enough on it's own) and you have to request permission from ofsted to be able to leave children with your assistant unsupervised.
Gaining permission from parents isn't enough - ofsted must approve it.

[suzyblue]

Please dont worry - I had a complaint put on my report thanks to my bitter ex partner. The complaint read like a parent had complained but there was nothing I could do so I just explained the circumstances to anyone that wanted to read my report. I have to say that it didnt seem to make any difference and most parents visit and dont ask to see the report anyway. Your panicking now but things will look better, try not to worry.

[sillysausage]

Thanks for the support girls, have just spoken to the mum concerned & she's going to write a letter to support me. I'm going to fight this, a warning would've been sufficient. All the changes they've made over the last few years - you miss one & your black marked for 5 years, no wonder 10 childminders are quitting every day in the UK currently

<<Big hugs>>
Unfortunately with the legal requirements being what they are I'm afraid fighting the complaint will almost certainly not make any difference. The wording on the final report that goes against your ofsted number will probably be worded pretty vaguely, because they need to protect both your confidentiality and that of mindees.
As others have said it would be best to be open and honest with all existing parents and any potential families. Having a letter etc from the parent concerned would be very helpful and you can always explain that you were unaware that you were breaking regulations at the time of the complaint.

[acorns]

Chin up, it's a mistake, that's all. As a bit of encouragment the parents I have now have never read my report! They judged me as they found me, which is what most parents so i think and as long as you explain the circumstances around the complaint and hopefully the mum can back this up in writing for you i certainly think you have abright future.x

[Pauline]

What makes me sad is that someone chose to make it an official complaint. Yes you were wrong to be doing it but why couldn't they have just told you? Then if you didn't do anything about it they could have put in a complaint.

You would no doubt have been horrified and immediately have put things right thus saving lots of stress and also the cost of the Ofsted visit.

People are so quick to complain these days. :(

[angeldelight]

What makes me sad is that someone chose to make it an official complaint. Yes you were wrong to be doing it but why couldn't they have just told you? Then if you didn't do anything about it they could have put in a complaint.

You would no doubt have been horrified and immediately have put things right thus saving lots of stress and also the cost of the Ofsted visit.

People are so quick to complain these days. :(

I agree

Judging with out knowing the first thing about this person. It happens all the time

Sad

Hope you are ok

Angel xx

[nic t]

Aw hun, chin up.

I find that most prospective parents will come and see you and get a feel for you before they read this. Also think of al the people that you will get through word of mouth who will not be bothered by this.

Yes, if honest it will put some people off but not everyone!

What really bugs me is Ofsted's lack of consistency in their dealings with certain things and how some things, which you would at the very least consider to be a severe warning are completely brushed under the carpet!

Hope you are feeling abit better. X

[babyface]

Big hugs going out to you.
We treat these children as our own as im sure you would not hesitate to let a sensible older sibling collect your child.
Settings should not allow anyone under 18yrs to collect either.
Thank you for posting this on here as i can see you have had some excellent advice and reassurance.
It is also a warning to other childminders who are doing the same thing.

[Louise0208]

im suprised at how many schools let the children go with under 18s :eek:

at my kids schools there not allowed to go with any 16 year olds (inc siblings) it used to be 18 but a lot of kids around here have parents that are not even 18 yet :laughing:

[Ripeberry]

Sorry, you may end up with this 'black mark' on your report but if you explain it to parents and they know that it is in the past then it should not cause problems.
That's another thing that gets on my goat about Ofsted. There are lots of UNREGISTERED childminders out there. One at my school has 3 different children at different times and she is certainly not insured, but these parents use her regardless :angry:
One parent used to use a proper registered CM (another one) and when she found out about this 'angel', she gave notice and the child goes to the unregistered lady now.

I so want to 'tell her off' (the mum) but of course she will just see it as sour grapes from me as I'm a registered CM and this person is fiddling everything left right and center.....Grrr!
And even if I reported her, they will do nowt! But she could counter complain against me and I'll get the black mark! :angry:
Can't you tell I'm angry?

[oakie dokie]

gets you thinking??? Parent changed schools without giving me any notice, I told her I could not pick her son up (he is now 9) from this school/. I do not put him in my books or charge for him. the teachers put him on the bus, he gets off down the road from mine and walks up to mine to meet mum here to pick other younger sibling up which at most is 45 min. the parent understands that i am not responsible for him. she has asked me but i refused that my daughter meets him at swimming and walks him here but again i said i just can't do this :eek:
but now makes me think twice about letting him walk here???

[oakie dokie]

sorry just like to add that if teachers are putting them on a public bus , who has the responsibility, where does it lie?... should they be putting them on a public bus?

[SYLVIA]

I was told on a recent workshop that if a child walks to my house from school then I should have my contracts and fee starting from when he gets to my house. So if anything happened (god forbid!) it would not be my responsibility. Spose that was wrong too. The child isn't with me now as he is at secondary school. So much to think about when the children get older.

[caz3007]

gets you thinking??? Parent changed schools without giving me any notice, I told her I could not pick her son up (he is now 9) from this school/. I do not put him in my books or charge for him. the teachers put him on the bus, he gets off down the road from mine and walks up to mine to meet mum here to pick other younger sibling up which at most is 45 min. the parent understands that i am not responsible for him. she has asked me but i refused that my daughter meets him at swimming and walks him here but again i said i just can't do this :eek:
but now makes me think twice about letting him walk here???

I think you are ok with independant arrival, but think even if you arent charging and he isnt on the books, I personally would get the mum to sign a disclaimer, agreeing that he wasnt my responsibility. This would cover you if there was ever a complaint

[nokidshere]

Lots of my school age mindees walk home (to my house) together - they are aged 7-11 and they never walk alone but almost always just the children.

Their contracts cleary state that they are allowed (by parents) to walk home. One of the reasons I have lots of children locally is that the parents want them to have some independence.

They always carry a mobile and do not leave school until I have seen them altogether. Its about 5 mins walk to my house on a big estate where many other people are walking home to the same place.

I hope you don't lose any business because of ths complaint - I hate people who complain first to the authorities without having the backbone to speak the people concerned first.

[rickysmiths]

Sorry, you may end up with this 'black mark' on your report but if you explain it to parents and they know that it is in the past then it should not cause problems.
That's another thing that gets on my goat about Ofsted. There are lots of UNREGISTERED childminders out there. One at my school has 3 different children at different times and she is certainly not insured, but these parents use her regardless :angry:
One parent used to use a proper registered CM (another one) and when she found out about this 'angel', she gave notice and the child goes to the unregistered lady now.

I so want to 'tell her off' (the mum) but of course she will just see it as sour grapes from me as I'm a registered CM and this person is fiddling everything left right and center.....Grrr!
And even if I reported her, they will do nowt! But she could counter complain against me and I'll get the black mark! :angry:
Can't you tell I'm angry?

If you know the school well could you speak to the Head? Say you have noticed that some parents are using carers who are not Regisitered as After School Clubs or as cms and it concerns you greatly the safety of the children. As she/he will be aware they can not be insured, do not do Child Protection training, First Aid etc. Would it be possible for the school to put a paragraph in the school news letter reminding parents about the after school options and the fact that it has come to the schools notice and other schools in the area (little white lie!) that there are a few unregistered carers touting for business and warn of the dangers of using them?

[Bananabrain]

I have something like this going on near me at the moment. I have informed my Network Coordiantor as to me it is very obviously wrong. Children should only be with the registered person (or assistant if applicable) unless in an emergency.

I am sorry for all the stress this is putting you through Gigglemonsters and as others have said if you be upfront with prospective parents then they will probably think it is silly. On the other hand I think you also have to prepare yourself for the fact that some parents (probably a very small minority) may see it as you not being aware of current rules and regulations.

I have read this thread with great interest and have to say that once again I am astounded with the nonsense the powers that be in this country churn out on a daily basis.
Sending you big hugs Giggle and prayers. I am sure things will settle and you will be fine.
Having read this thread and having similar issues myself with an older sibling picking up, I spoke to the great Ofsted yesterday. They effectively told me that;
Yes, that's correct, leaving children with anyone that doesn't have first aid is illegal.
There is no such thing as an emergency!!!!!!!!!! That was the one that really got me. Even if it's unsafe to take children out in a blizzard, I still can't leave them with my hubby when I go to school.
They do not regulate over 8's so cannot comment on legal ages, why I need independent arrival policy or permissions for siblings to pick-up!!!!!Even when I know that it will be questioned on inspection.
Confused, you betcha I am.
I think that if you entrust your precious children to a childminder, there has to be an element of trust and understanding that whilst she will obviously do her best by her charges, childminders are human and come up against 'emergencies' just like everyone else.
I have also spoken to the NCMA about a couple of issues recently. I am not impressed NCMA!
Will we ever see the day that childminders who bust a gut on a daily basis get some support and credit????? I wonder.
Giggle, you are in my thoughts, hang in there, things will be fine.

[nic t]

I have read this thread with great interest and have to say that once again I am astounded with the nonsense the powers that be in this country churn out on a daily basis.
Sending you big hugs Giggle and prayers. I am sure things will settle and you will be fine.
Having read this thread and having similar issues myself with an older sibling picking up, I spoke to the great Ofsted yesterday. They effectively told me that;
Yes, that's correct, leaving children with anyone that doesn't have first aid is illegal.
There is no such thing as an emergency!!!!!!!!!! That was the one that really got me. Even if it's unsafe to take children out in a blizzard, I still can't leave them with my hubby when I go to school.
They do not regulate over 8's so cannot comment on legal ages, why I need independent arrival policy or permissions for siblings to pick-up!!!!!Even when I know that it will be questioned on inspection.
Confused, you betcha I am.
I think that if you entrust your precious children to a childminder, there has to be an element of trust and understanding that whilst she will obviously do her best by her charges, childminders are human and come up against 'emergencies' just like everyone else.
I have also spoken to the NCMA about a couple of issues recently. I am not impressed NCMA!
Will we ever see the day that childminders who bust a gut on a daily basis get some support and credit????? I wonder.
Giggle, you are in my thoughts, hang in there, things will be fine.

Great post Louise:clapping:

[watgem]

I'm so sorry, I have been through something similar over the past 4 months, where a parent accused me of holding their child's hand too tightly, 3 weeks after I was supposed to have done it(luckily I always walk home with another CM who could witness that the child was on a little life backpack)but reported me to Ofsted for my policy of getting children to sit at the table to eat being too rigid. Ofsted came out, agreed that it was malicious but said that I would have to keep the complaint on file for 5 years even though they were taking no action. I've been threatened, intimidated and harrassed by this man and am now waiting to hear from the courts, although I've been told he'll probally get away with it because he didn't swear directly at me! I really thought all my parents would leave me, 2 were considering it , not because of the complaint but because this guy kept threatening me in front of children. I had 2 kiddies booked in to start and thought there is no way their parents will want me now. Thanks to some very helpful advice from this site, and the support of my EYSO, her boss, the local school, nurseries and preschools and other childminders I am still in business and have just taken on another child. I am gutted that after 7 years I have 1 complaint, but I am trying to come to terms with it, and reflecting on how I can improve things all the time. I am expecting another visit from Mrs O and am sure they will be looking for something to pick me up on, so I really know how you are feeling, so am sending you lots of positive vibes and hugs and I think people will surprise you, the fact you had 11 years without a complaint tells them what a lovely person you are:)xxxx

[luiza.t]

Honestly?
You should have know that it is not on to let your underage children to do a school run for you even with parents consent.
And I am shocked at the parents atitude also.
I am with Ofsted on this one, sorry.

[Bridey]

Honestly?
You should have know that it is not on to let your underage children to do a school run for you even with parents consent.
And I am shocked at the parents atitude also.
I am with Ofsted on this one, sorry.

Having just read through this thread for the first time my reaction was exactly the same. I too am totally shocked that any childminder would think its ok for minded children to be under the sole responsibility of another child, even for a second. "I didn't know it was wrong" is absolutely no excuse. I'm afraid I have no sympathy and feel that Ofsted have acted correctly.