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View Full Version : Do i have MUG written on my forehead, help...!



TammyN
19-01-2011, 12:54 PM
arghhh im not impressed please give me support as im just about to blow!
mindee a developed spots yesterday, i sent her home to step dad and txt mu to let her know to check spots if she developed more she can't come, simple!
she come this morning along side other mindee, put her in pram herself, it's school run time as i checked how mindee b was, when sorted i asked mindee a mum, no more then and reply was oh only a few that you had spotted and pointed to a new one, i said she didn't have that you will need to get it confirmed really, to which she replied, if you need it confirming i'll make you an appointment at the docs for her, i'll ring you as she gets in her car and drives off :censored:
she rings with a time, so i take mindee to the docs after drop off to have confirmed chickenpox and impetigo:angry: i ring mum at 10.50 to tell her what was said and she needs picking up to which she says ok i will get her after this home visit, i tell her i am going on school run at 12 and she says ok i'll be there before then, guess what she's still here, ive just rang and she said hi, ive just finished home visit, im on my way in 5 mins.
now i am fuming, this child is playing with 2 littleones whilst she waits for mum and im stressing, any advice, sorry it's long but im livid i have allowed this parent to play me like this!!
Tammy

Louise0208
19-01-2011, 12:59 PM
i think (if i remember correctly) she would of been contagious for a while anyway :(

....not that it makes the mums behavoiur of the situation any better!

~Chelle~
19-01-2011, 01:01 PM
I would have told her point blank this morning that you were not accepting her daughter as you did not know what the spots were and until SHE takes her daughter to the doctor, you would not be accepting her.

I would not be letting her near any other children, if she has impetigo as well, it is extremely contagious.

I cannot believe that mum let you take her child to the doctors:eek: That is not your job, that is hers as a parent.

I would tell mum that you will not accept child back until the impetigo and chicken pox have gone.

TammyN
19-01-2011, 01:01 PM
i think (if i remember correctly) she would of been contagious for a while anyway :(

....not that it makes the mums behavoiur of the situation any better!

yeah that's prob mums ideas too but mindee today is first day of his week therefore i could have prevented it, iyswim.
doc has advised 5 days for chickenpox and until impetigo has completely cleared but no time scale?

TammyN
19-01-2011, 01:02 PM
I would have told her point blank this morning that you were not accepting her daughter as you did not know what the spots were and until SHE takes her daughter to the doctor, you would not be accepting her.

I would not be letting her near any other children, if she has impetigo as well, it is extremely contagious.

I cannot believe that mum let you take her child to the doctors:eek: That is not your job, that is hers as a parent.

I would tell mum that you will not accept child back until the impetigo and chicken pox have gone.

i wish i was that strong :(

Louise0208
19-01-2011, 01:05 PM
i wish i was that strong :(

you & me both lol:thumbsup:

Laura233
19-01-2011, 01:07 PM
I agree, unless you know what the spots are I would refuse to care for her and make the mother go to the doctors to have it confirmed... some parents need to learn that their children should be their priority otherwise they should have thought about their kids before they had them (I had one like this recently so still wound up!)

TammyN
19-01-2011, 01:27 PM
arghhh this is unbelievable, she has now got stuck in traffic and will be with me as soon as she can :angry: i just feel like throwing in the towel, it's just a joke.

rickysmiths
19-01-2011, 01:28 PM
I agree, unless you know what the spots are I would refuse to care for her and make the mother go to the doctors to have it confirmed... some parents need to learn that their children should be their priority otherwise they should have thought about their kids before they had them (I had one like this recently so still wound up!)

I can't agree more. I would not have let her in the door. I'm afraid children are not convienient and it is tough sometimes.

Definately not have taken her to the doctor, that IS NOT MY JOB the parents do this. What a cheeky mum.

I would make sure she doesn't come back until the very last spot has gone for both conditions Remind her she has to still pay you and to pray her contageous child hasn't given it to you and you have to close as a result because that will not only be a pain for her but remind her about the problems for all the other parents and you.

It is hard sometimes but you have to be strong.

I once had a mum dump an 8mth old on the doorstep and tell me the doctors appointment was at 10.30. I just managed to say good I'll see you at 10.15 then. She was shocked she thought I would be taking the child. Between 9am and 10.30 (yes she was late!) I changed the childs nappy 10 times :angry: so when she returned I told her whatever the doctor said I would not see her again until the child had been free of the squits for 2 full days. She worked at home so could have kept the child. Some parents are quite unbelieveable.
A Mum ahead of me at per-school this morning was explaining to the Manager that she had dosed her lo with Calpol but it may have worn off by lunchtime so they would have to give him more (it was in his bag) to see him through the day :eek: If he was really bad they could ring Granny to collect him but he was so looking forward to having his packed lunch she had to bring him :eek: Who is the adult here? I have a feeling she may have got a call by 10am!! But what a cheek- here you are look after my sick child.

rickysmiths
19-01-2011, 01:33 PM
arghhh this is unbelievable, she has now got stuck in traffic and will be with me as soon as she can :angry: i just feel like throwing in the towel, it's just a joke.


Well at least she will have the next 5 or 6 days to ponder on her stupidity and selfishness. Have you isolated the lo?

I would and make a point to the mum the difficulty of this and how awful it was to have to do it to a child.

TammyN
19-01-2011, 01:38 PM
Well at least she will have the next 5 or 6 days to ponder on her stupidity and selfishness. Have you isolated the lo?

I would and make a point to the mum the difficulty of this and how awful it was to have to do it to a child.

i did have her sat in high chair but she's 2 and just wants to play, it's hard to isolate her and poor mite it's really note her fault she has a awful mum :( i think she has picked up on my tone during the phone calls back and to but to be honest, i really don't think she'll ponder much.

~Chelle~
19-01-2011, 01:41 PM
Cannot believe that you called her nearly 3 hours ago and she still has not collected her sick child, she is a disgrace!.

Poor little mite x

TammyN
19-01-2011, 01:48 PM
Cannot believe that you called her nearly 3 hours ago and she still has not collected her sick child, she is a disgrace!.

Poor little mite x

it is a joke, i can see a strong letter coming on!! with advice form you all :laughing: she did try and ring the emargency but they are also stuck other side of traffic :mad:

The Juggler
19-01-2011, 02:21 PM
arghhh this is unbelievable, she has now got stuck in traffic and will be with me as soon as she can :angry: i just feel like throwing in the towel, it's just a joke.

home visits what is her job? don't tell me she works in a school or as a doctor! she should know better?

impetigo!!! is horribly contagious. silly woman:angry:

snufflepuff
19-01-2011, 02:28 PM
WOW! Sounds like something one of my Mums would do.

Definitely in a need of a strongly worded letter! She needs to know that you are a CM not a nurse or a personal slave, she is the parent so it's up to her to take LO to the doctor, and you do not care for contagious children! And also perhaps she should give you some more emergency contact details- she can't get to you and neither can the other contact you have. What if LO was being rushed to hospital?!

Happy Bunny
19-01-2011, 02:35 PM
I do wonder whether parents actually read our sickness policies etc. or forget the fact that most of us state it all when we first take child on.
One of mine kept conveniently forgetting all of the above and even had the cheek to say that she didn't have to pay me for sick days as i had refused to have her child.

You are not a nurse and i bet if it was one of the other children who was ill and her darling child had caught it she would say something.

TammyN
19-01-2011, 02:46 PM
well she picked up at 2.30 :angry: :censored: :angry: and commented as she took her out 'come on lets get the disease ridden child out of the house!!!!
cheeky woman i am livid and really will be looking at a very stearn letter to follow!
anyone know can i charge if i have to close due to infection from this child?

karen m
19-01-2011, 03:09 PM
Poor you seen this comming yesterday i feel so sorry for lo,

Ripeberry
19-01-2011, 03:57 PM
Don't let her come back tomorrow! Anyway, how could you take the child to the doctors? Patient confidentiality means you would have to be the mum or dad or relative?

Tippy Toes
19-01-2011, 04:18 PM
Thats terrible and I feel for you and the child.

I would be fuming too!

crazyhazy
19-01-2011, 06:43 PM
Chicken pox definately don't let her back until the last spot has crusted over, you might find the other mindees will be lucky and avoid it, when my eldest got it, her little friend was in contact quite a bit and managed to avoid it somehow, even my youngest took a full 2 weeks after contact to come out in spots.

Impetigo, my eldest had this a couple of months ago and I was told by two different drs that guidelines now said they could attend school etc 24hours after starting treatment, as she was diagnosed during the day and I'd already had my schoolie in the morning, I contacted her mum and she was happy for her to come after school as usual, no one else got it from her.

MaryMary
19-01-2011, 07:37 PM
I would be horrified if a mindee turned up with chicken pox - as I have never had it :panic:
I think I am immune, as all 3 of my children have had it (my eldest would use me as a scratching post!:eek: ). But I worry that my luck may have run out, and not willing to take that risk!
My mum was a primary school teacher, and she has never had it either. Nor my brother or sister (good genes! Must be hubby's fault :laughing: )
Good luck with the letter

TammyN
19-01-2011, 09:48 PM
THANX FOR REPLY'S, sorry i haven't replied ive been to uni tonight.
im looking for a course on self assertiveness once ive finished my foundation degree :laughing: no seriously it has really made me think about my policies and how i need to back myself up by refering to them much more than i do at present. i will be sending revised copies to all my parents by monday next week and see what reaction i get.
it is a shame the poor mindee is such a doll, i did feel for her. i spent the afternoon dettoling everything she i could see and checking my own dd for spots :panic:
hopefully the end of my week will prove more prooductive than the beginning.
btw the juggler she is a social worker:eek: need i say more!!
Tammy

Happy Gardener
19-01-2011, 10:07 PM
A social worker! She surely should know better!! Poor you, & good luck with your letter.

Mookins
19-01-2011, 10:33 PM
I have to say that this mother is bloomin awful.... i am a regular sufferer of impetigo last bout was just before xmas and I shut...woke up with what i thought was a coldsore and by lunch time it was (i thought) huge..nearly half of top lip...rang mindees mum and explained and she was fine, even bought me a packet of straws so i didnt spread bugs on cups:laughing: its awful thing to have very uncomfortable and so very contagious

that poor little tike :angry:

xx

gegele
20-01-2011, 08:16 AM
I think some people are just idiots and need to be treated as so.

tell her that if it was an other mindee being ill and contagious she wouldn't be happy for her daughter to catch things from a child who should have been home.

if i say a child needs to be collected parents know i mean it.

sentence like this would maybe kick her into action :
"if you don't pick your child from me ASAP you can go and pick him/her up from social services as i am not caring for a contagious child!"

:laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

Joda
20-01-2011, 10:21 AM
Social workers are the worst! I've got a friend who is a social worker and she refuses to collect her child from school if he is ill - she tells the school to stick him in the medical room if he is that bad!

PixiePetal
20-01-2011, 10:47 AM
I would be horrified if a mindee turned up with chicken pox - as I have never had it :panic:
I think I am immune, as all 3 of my children have had it (my eldest would use me as a scratching post!:eek: ). But I worry that my luck may have run out, and not willing to take that risk!
My mum was a primary school teacher, and she has never had it either. Nor my brother or sister (good genes! Must be hubby's fault :laughing: )
Good luck with the letter

I have never had it! At 45 I don't want it either :rolleyes:

My kids and all mindees have had it at some point but I have so far been safe. I want to keep it that way :thumbsup:

cheryl6880
20-01-2011, 01:25 PM
i would not of taken her this morning tell her you can not take her back until scabbed over

The Juggler
20-01-2011, 03:02 PM
I think some people are just idiots and need to be treated as so.

tell her that if it was an other mindee being ill and contagious she wouldn't be happy for her daughter to catch things from a child who should have been home.

if i say a child needs to be collected parents know i mean it.

sentence like this would maybe kick her into action :
"if you don't pick your child from me ASAP you can go and pick him/her up from social services as i am not caring for a contagious child!"

:laughing: :laughing: :laughing:



wonder how that would go down given her job:laughing: :laughing:

TammyN
20-01-2011, 04:03 PM
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wonder how that would go down given her job:laughing: :laughing:

yeah thats what i thought too. oh well got my coordinator coming on monday now to have a chat and help me and help me with paperwork, policies, etc.

Pipsqueak
20-01-2011, 04:14 PM
Its appalling how these so called 'professionals' (teachers, doctors, SW) treat their own children.

I would be sitting down and writing her a letter about her lack of respect for you, the setting, other children (and families) in your care - citing ECM and EYFS and any other legislation you can think of. I would be ramming home as well about prompt collection. Do you not have any other numbers (ie granny, neighbour, dad etc) to call - I would be pushing for other numbers.

I would be enclosing a copy of your sickness policy for her and tell her in no uncertain terms any further breaches of contractual terms and conditions then you will have no alternative but to consider termination of contract.


I would also be taking issue with her saying 'disease ridden child' and pointing out her unnecessary and childish behaviour is unwarrented.

What a selfish ignorant woman - no wonder people have no faith whatsoever in these people.

TammyN
20-01-2011, 08:52 PM
Its appalling how these so called 'professionals' (teachers, doctors, SW) treat their own children.

I would be sitting down and writing her a letter about her lack of respect for you, the setting, other children (and families) in your care - citing ECM and EYFS and any other legislation you can think of. I would be ramming home as well about prompt collection. Do you not have any other numbers (ie granny, neighbour, dad etc) to call - I would be pushing for other numbers.

I would be enclosing a copy of your sickness policy for her and tell her in no uncertain terms any further breaches of contractual terms and conditions then you will have no alternative but to consider termination of contract.


I would also be taking issue with her saying 'disease ridden child' and pointing out her unnecessary and childish behaviour is unwarrented.

What a selfish ignorant woman - no wonder people have no faith whatsoever in these people.

:thumbsup: thanx i so need you, u have the idea of how i want to be.

TammyN
20-01-2011, 08:55 PM
just to update i have just recieved a text off mum saying "im not convinced she has either chickenpox or impetigo, there is no blisters and the spots have nearly all gone :eek: "
pleae give me strength, a doctor confirmed it, i could not do anymore than follow his advice. when i txt back saying ahh hope she is feeling better as she was so poorly yesterday, she said yeah must be viral, ive used cream last night and today and she looks better :eek: hmmmm.

mufftie
20-01-2011, 09:03 PM
she's just desperate for you to have the child again tomorrow :eeeek:

cant believe she expected you to take them the doc's , id have giver her a big fat no and then to disbelieve what the doc diagnosed is bloomin rediculus , im gobsmacked tbh

The Juggler
20-01-2011, 10:13 PM
i had a parent once I had to almost force to take her child to docs. she went to a&e and was told 10 days min. she wanted to bring back after a week as it had cleared up almost and I said that was ok as long as she went back to docs and got medical advice that it was cleared.


She was NOT happy but I insisted:panic: if they are going against medical advice/diagnosis they need to get 'fit to return' notes

Pipsqueak
20-01-2011, 10:44 PM
:thumbsup: thanx i so need you, u have the idea of how i want to be.

:blush: :blush: ahhh bless you.

you too can be a miserable batty old bag like me.... if you try hard enough lol:D

hun re the update - text back and say that you were there when a qualified medical professional gave the diagnosis and you will not be accepting the child back into the setting until they are well again and you may require a doctors note to confirm this.

I would 'soften' the blow of her having to care for her own child by saying you understand her job is important but you too are a professional and have a duty of care to not just her child.

From here after - you correspond by phone backed up by written info.

crazyhazy
21-01-2011, 10:36 AM
to be fair I had my own daughter at the drs twice and was told it was likely she had chicken pox and the next day her spots had gone, it was the 3rd time she finally got it and like I said before the dr recently told me guidelines for impetigo had changed and a day after treatment had started they were ok to go to school etc. I sympathise though cos I have a very similar parent and struggle with assertiveness too

MaryMary
21-01-2011, 10:50 AM
just to update i have just recieved a text off mum saying "im not convinced she has either chickenpox or impetigo, there is no blisters and the spots have nearly all gone :eek: "
pleae give me strength, a doctor confirmed it, i could not do anymore than follow his advice. when i txt back saying ahh hope she is feeling better as she was so poorly yesterday, she said yeah must be viral, ive used cream last night and today and she looks better :eek: hmmmm.

How about going back to her and saying that if she had bothered to take her own child to see the doc, he could have told her himself!! :angry:

Stick to your guns and stay strong :thumbsup:

TammyN
21-01-2011, 01:15 PM
well she has txt me today to say she is going to docs with mindee to get her checked over as she has had a really bad night with her and she needs medicine so she can treat over the weekend properly :laughing: i give up!

my own dd is now ill and took her to docs this morning, she has tonsilitis, poor little mite, lucky im off today so i can cuddle up and look after her, shes sleeping at the mo tho.

The Juggler
21-01-2011, 01:18 PM
well she has txt me today to say she is going to docs with mindee to get her checked over as she has had a really bad night with her and she needs medicine so she can treat over the weekend properly :laughing: i give up!

my own dd is now ill and took her to docs this morning, she has tonsilitis, poor little mite, lucky im off today so i can cuddle up and look after her, shes sleeping at the mo tho.

well she's seen sense. sorry to hear about your dd. my dd had this last week and was soooo ill with it.

ORKSIE
21-01-2011, 01:22 PM
Hope your DD feels better soon :)

TammyN
21-01-2011, 07:56 PM
my dd is struggling but is doing ok, still being sick but at the mo is licking a lolly :thumbsup:
update on mindee, she has a 'mild dose' of chickenpox and impetigo :eek: oh and now guess what they have said she has tonsilitis too, hmmmm i wonder where my dd got it from then :( at least she now has a med so hopefully will begin to get better, just hope she is given the treatment now

Allie
21-01-2011, 08:05 PM
I can't believe some parents:( I would never have left my children when they were ill



Allie