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View Full Version : What should I do, feeling totally lost?



phoebe-alice
21-11-2010, 04:53 PM
Had a lovely day yesterday found out that I had the friday free now due to a parent getting a new job, so have a meeting tomorrow with a potential family for giving care on fridays a little boy whose 3 and girl whose 15 months which I'd love to do.

But.... the lady whose job was changing went and through out of her many bombshells. She now says she will have to work some fridays becuase the hours are flexi which is clearly not what she told me before.

I'm feeling so depressed about everything as I thought I would finally have a wee change from the same problems I face every week from the other family and work with some new kids.

I have had so many problems with them its unbelieveable from late payments, to them just being plain rude and using me as a personal taxi when they are able to pick the girls up. I'm just sick to the back teeth of silly hours and hardly any notice of hours as they change weekly which I hate! As I feel as if shes in control instead of myself.

One part of me just wants them to go else where but the other is petrified of what she will say do as she can be very snidey and horrible especially in texts. But at the same time they are my main source of income. Its hard only having two registered places as I'm tied down to a single family it feels.

Everything just seems bitter and I have no idea what to say or do. I'm sorry for the major rant, just feel so depressed about the situation. The contract was made to be looked over every 4 months and the 4 months is approaching so if I did do anything I don't know how it would work with notice periods. Any advise would be great, and sorry again for all the doom and gloom. :(

Polly2
21-11-2010, 05:02 PM
Could you possibly tell her that you are unable to accomodate her flexi hours as you need a regular income?

She sounds really pushy and you sound like you are being bullied into this. you need to get tough and either tell her what spaces you have or give notice due to 'change of circumstances'.

So sorry you are so down about it all. xx

Tups
21-11-2010, 05:05 PM
sorry you feel fed up, I have had parents like this, you could say, you have some one that wants the Friday, but if she wants you some Fridays then charge her half fee for that day, tell her your keeping it open for her, then when you get a replacement get rid of them, life is hard enough without parents like that, tups

Penny1959
21-11-2010, 05:13 PM
Suggest you tell her that can only offer her the Friday if she pays in full for it every week, as you can not keep a whole day available just in case she needs it.

At least that way if she agrees you will have income for every Friday - but without the hassle every Friday - and if she refuses you can take on the other family.

Just a thought did she tell you in writing would not need the Friday or did you record the conversation somewhere or draw up (or agree to) a new contract - if any of these things occured then you are within your rights to tell her that the Friday place is no longer available.

Penny :)

phoebe-alice
21-11-2010, 05:39 PM
Thanks all for your advise it really is much appreciated as its just all got too much.

I have just texted her saying if she cannot give me contracted hours when the contract is due for renewal then I can no longer accomodate for her. My tummy is now in major knots, I'm dreading what she will reply.

I just hate that my hours are all over the place and I can't take any other kids on as it stands, cause I haven't a clue where the hours will be.

Do you think its fair that I said I would no longer provide care if she didn't provide contracted hours?

Thanks for all your comments though they make me feel alot better about it I just hope it all comes out in the wash. :(

caz3007
21-11-2010, 06:10 PM
sorry you feel fed up, I have had parents like this, you could say, you have some one that wants the Friday, but if she wants you some Fridays then charge her half fee for that day, tell her your keeping it open for her, then when you get a replacement get rid of them, life is hard enough without parents like that, tups

I agree, why should you miss out on some extra income 'just in case' she needs a Friday. If she wants to keep the place, then she should have to pay for the privelidge, especially as she doesnt appreciate what you do.

Good luck xxx

Chatterbox Childcare
21-11-2010, 06:35 PM
It sounds to me like you have made your mind up anyway.

Your contract does not end just because it is up for renewal. For it to end either party needs to give the agreed notice.

Personally i don't like discussions by text or email and would ask the parent in to discuss exactly what it is she needs and then I would make up my mind.

Chimps Childminding
21-11-2010, 06:59 PM
Sorry you are having a rough time at present!!! I agree that if she wants flexi hours she is going to have to pay for the days she is not using as this stops you earning money on those days!!! I had a similar problem with one parent she needed 5 days kept open, but only used 2-3 of them - but not the same days each week She paid half for the days she didn't use as I couldn't take anyone else on. Still not ideal, but better than nothing!!

Good luck, hope you get it sorted!!!

Ali56
21-11-2010, 08:29 PM
Sorry to hear you are having a bad moment-I agree with the others. I think you should tell her that she has to pay for fridays whether she uses them or not. Tell her you have other children to fill those hours so she can no longer have them 'reserved' for free. After all, a nursery wouldn't be anywhere near as accomodating as you sound as though you have been already (or as patient) Childminders can be so good for flexi hours, but it is frustrating when parents take the mick a bit! If her hours are flexi then surely she can choose to fit them in to Mon-Thurs?

Polly2
22-11-2010, 10:16 AM
Thanks all for your advise it really is much appreciated as its just all got too much.

I have just texted her saying if she cannot give me contracted hours when the contract is due for renewal then I can no longer accomodate for her. My tummy is now in major knots, I'm dreading what she will reply.

I just hate that my hours are all over the place and I can't take any other kids on as it stands, cause I haven't a clue where the hours will be.

Do you think its fair that I said I would no longer provide care if she didn't provide contracted hours?

Thanks for all your comments though they make me feel alot better about it I just hope it all comes out in the wash. :(

Yes I do think its fair, she needs to give you regular hours so you can fill spaces and live your own life!

I know its easier to text - especially if you don't like confrontations - but it might be better if you could have a chat face to face. Even if you have written things down so you don't forget.

Have you heard anything?

Goatgirl
22-11-2010, 10:29 AM
Hi :),
Sorry you're having this hassle :(

Have you heard anything else from the parent in question?
I personally would have just told her you have another family interested in the Friday space as you understood were told it wasn't needed any longer and you are giving notice of Fridays no longer being available. The contracted hours she must provide should be between monday to thursday only. Just write a professional - sounding letter and make sure you keep a copy. You can hand it to her and briefly explain face to face, or post it. Texts can get a bit long and complicated in my experience.......

I really think you must show her who's in charge of your business. SHe seems to think it's her :eek:

Hope it works out and you can have some more pleasant interaction with a new, more respectful family soon :)

best wishes,
Wendy