Beware - Facebook Posting

[Heaven Scent]

I like a great many of you have got 100's of friends on facebook and most of them are from here - thats a reflection of my age - a great many of my friends are technophobes like me - born before the technical revolution LOL!!!

Anyhow I have noticed that a lot of my good forum friends have recently started posing the sorts of threads that should be reserved for the privacy of the forum - Threads which involve such things as difficulties with parents and concerns about parental behaviour. I know we need to either seek advice or sound off about the above as we work alone and need support from others who would have similar experience etc - that is why Pauline created this forum - so that we can and at the same time protect ourselves from being mis-understood with the added advantage of being able to keep our selves annonymous.

Facebook is a very public forum and we never know who is reading what we write and I feel it is very very dangerous for us to comment about anything at all that is relating to our work practice that may show us in an unprofessional light.

I have passed a comment in my status showing my anger at some government body or other who was putting someone in danger due to the lack of risk assessments and then added Oh I forgot that its only childminders that have to do them - but that is as far as I would go - it just showed that I knew the risk and recognised bad practice elsewhere - in otherwords I showed us in reasonably good light.

I did send a private message to one minder who had a large number of replies to her comment but I have not read what they wrote - the parent quite clearly did appear to be in the wrong but I do feel the minder has put herself and her family at risk by discussing the matter on Facebook - on the other thread I just put a comment in the discussion suggesting that it was a subject that should just be discussed here on the forum and not on facebook.

I feel that because we are all friends on here and on the facebook (and some people know who's who on both - unlike me:blush:) and we tend to have a giggle in the lounge on subjects that quite often cross over onto facebook and that is often fine - but I think we need to be very careful that other minders are happy to be part of it and are happy to be mentioned publically even if what is being said is done in jest. I have cringed when someone put something on facebook that I said to them in a phone conversation and had to ask them to remove it - what may seem perfectly normal and innocent to most of us may not seem that way to parents or to Network co-ordinators. Mine is a friend of mine on there and has tagged me into photos of her 50th party which I attended.

Please Please bear in mind that facebook is a very public forum where anyone can see what you write and it is you first duty to protect yourself and your family so think twice about what you write on there especially when it concerns your mindees and their families and others who may not wish to be included.

[ORKSIE]

Totally agree.:thumbsup:

I only talk about wine:laughing: :laughing:

[ajs]

Totally agree.:thumbsup:

I only talk about wine:laughing: :laughing:

yeah i have noticed that

[ORKSIE]

yeah i have noticed that

:laughing: :laughing:

[Mookins]

:clapping:
i too havent a scooby who most are.....:blush: fully understand where you are coming from though

xx

[Heaven Scent]

Totally agree.:thumbsup:

I only talk about wine:laughing: :laughing:

Yeah - but I'm so paranoid I'm even careful how I speak about that too.

I sometimes have a bit of banter going with my friends husband on there - she is a fellow minder and when meet we do have a laugh about him - he seems to be going through a mid-life crises and its genuinely getting her down so I put jokey jibes on then one day I realised that if some of the local yokels from round here saw our toing and froing all done in jest it could be taken up the wrong way - so I put something on there saying as much and implying that it would be all over the local rag (that his daughter works for) that we are having an affair and made up a possible headline along the lines of "Local Business main unfaithful to his slim attractive blonde wife of 27 yrs with short fat dark curley haird Irish blow in to the town" - I felt ppl sometimes have little to amuse them and like to stir sh** for others.

The other thing I worry about is swearing - I swear like a tooper - its the Irish in me - and thankfully because of the good training I've had on here I can curtail it on there!!!

[rickysmiths]

This is one of the reasons I haven't gone on Facebook. Also where do you all find the time?

[melanieabigail2004]

Exactly why I have not added any of you lovely ladies to my FB account - its not that I am rude but what I say re childminding should be on here and not there - I also don't add parents to my FB account

[Bushpig]

This is also why I have 2 FB accounts - one for personal use and one for childminding friends... I don't get on that often but it's a lovely place to catch up. I am also very careful what I write on FB - would never dream of complaining re parents/OFSTED etc. on there. You have to be careful!

[kindredspirits]

I don't have facebook either - I don't have enough people who would be interested in my life. I do however find it useful to have a nosy on my stepsons girlfriends facebook page and see what they're up to as she doesn't keep it private. :laughing:

[Hebs]

I have all but 1 set of parents on fb, i never call my parents or the kids but do post comments when we've had a good day etc.

:thumbsup:

and as for when i post when tipsy my parents love it cos in their words....... it's proves i'm human and just like them :laughing: and not a toffee nosed stuck up :D yes one mum did say that

[Heaven Scent]

I have all but 1 set of parents on fb, i never call my parents or the kids but do post comments when we've had a good day etc.

:thumbsup:

and as for when i post when tipsy my parents love it cos in their words....... it's proves i'm human and just like them :laughing: and not a toffee nosed stuck up :D yes one mum did say that

I know what you mean most people are normal sane human beings but then you get the odd crank and they can be ppl you thought were normal that when they get a bee in their bonnet about you they can turn on you as soon as look at you thats all I'm saying. Its very sad but very true

[Mollymop]

I agree too:thumbsup: I have a few facebook friends that are parents so I am always very careful about what I write anyway, but I would never moan about my job or parents in public

[guest2]

Hi

I agree posting on facebook is dangerous! But first and foremost you are breaching confidentiality by discussing issues on a social networking site and this is both irresponsible and unprofessional and will put childcare professionals in a bad light. I have a policy on social networking sites such as facebook, twitter bebo etc... Parents do not want to know you got leathered on a sunday night and are looking after their most prized posession on the monday morning with a hangover!!
Be careful what you post and if necessary who you are friends with it can lead to all sorts of trouble if your not careful!

:thumbsup:

[Hebs]

Hi

I agree posting on facebook is dangerous! But first and foremost you are breaching confidentiality by discussing issues on a social networking site and this is both irresponsible and unprofessional and will put childcare professionals in a bad light. I have a policy on social networking sites such as facebook, twitter bebo etc... Parents do not want to know you got leathered on a sunday night and are looking after their most prized posession on the monday morning with a hangover!!
Be careful what you post and if necessary who you are friends with it can lead to all sorts of trouble if your not careful!

:thumbsup:

Ofsted have no issues with me having parents as friends on fb, or that i have an album for photos of mindees (at parents request which i have written requests for again ofsted fine with it)
and i didnt think we could drink one night than have kids the next morning?? IF i do have a drink it's always on a friday or saturday night when i dont have the kids the next day, i will not drink alcohol for 24 hours before looking after the mindees :)

[Bushpig]

Oi! I may never get drunk but I am defintely no stuck up, each to their own....!!! :laughing: :laughing: :rolleyes:

[Hebs]

Oi! I may never get drunk but I am defintely no stuck up, each to their own....!!! :laughing: :laughing: :rolleyes:

one of my mums says sorry every time her LO does something, i've told her so many times its the wrong job if your houseproud :laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

i dont drink much, but when i do i make up for lost time :jump for joy: :jump for joy:

[caz3007]

I do go on FB, and do have several mums as friends, but I have been out and had drinks with all of them and sometimes been a bit worse for wear on a friday night with them, but hey they know I look after their children well and certainly wouldnt with a hang over. I am very careful with what I say on FB, I dont advertise the fact I am a CM and I have my privacy levels set at the highest level I can.

I cant believe though CM who post on FB their gripes and groans about parents/children, after all you dont know if any of your FB contacts know your parents, do you

[guest2]

No I have a drink on friday night sometimes but working in nurseries previously I have come accross staff who have been hung over or still smell of alcohol and I've had to send them home as unfit to work, also I have had to deal with complaints from parents because of comments made on facebook by staff members that they are not happy with. It makes you very wary is all i'm saying!!

[ORKSIE]

Yeah - but I'm so paranoid I'm even careful how I speak about that too.

I sometimes have a bit of banter going with my friends husband on there - she is a fellow minder and when meet we do have a laugh about him - he seems to be going through a mid-life crises and its genuinely getting her down so I put jokey jibes on then one day I realised that if some of the local yokels from round here saw our toing and froing all done in jest it could be taken up the wrong way - so I put something on there saying as much and implying that it would be all over the local rag (that his daughter works for) that we are having an affair and made up a possible headline along the lines of "Local Business main unfaithful to his slim attractive blonde wife of 27 yrs with short fat dark curley haird Irish blow in to the town" - I felt ppl sometimes have little to amuse them and like to stir sh** for others.

The other thing I worry about is swearing - I swear like a tooper - its the Irish in me - and thankfully because of the good training I've had on here I can curtail it on there!!!

HS, I dont have any parents on my FB its my personal FB.
For this reason...I have had parents ask me to add them and I have declined and told them I dont think its a good idea:thumbsup:

[Winnie]

I like a great many of you have got 100's of friends on facebook and most of them are from here - thats a reflection of my age - a great many of my friends are technophobes like me - born before the technical revolution LOL!!!

Anyhow I have noticed that a lot of my good forum friends have recently started posing the sorts of threads that should be reserved for the privacy of the forum - Threads which involve such things as difficulties with parents and concerns about parental behaviour. I know we need to either seek advice or sound off about the above as we work alone and need support from others who would have similar experience etc - that is why Pauline created this forum - so that we can and at the same time protect ourselves from being mis-understood with the added advantage of being able to keep our selves annonymous.

Facebook is a very public forum and we never know who is reading what we write and I feel it is very very dangerous for us to comment about anything at all that is relating to our work practice that may show us in an unprofessional light.

I have passed a comment in my status showing my anger at some government body or other who was putting someone in danger due to the lack of risk assessments and then added Oh I forgot that its only childminders that have to do them - but that is as far as I would go - it just showed that I knew the risk and recognised bad practice elsewhere - in otherwords I showed us in reasonably good light.

I did send a private message to one minder who had a large number of replies to her comment but I have not read what they wrote - the parent quite clearly did appear to be in the wrong but I do feel the minder has put herself and her family at risk by discussing the matter on Facebook - on the other thread I just put a comment in the discussion suggesting that it was a subject that should just be discussed here on the forum and not on facebook.

I feel that because we are all friends on here and on the facebook (and some people know who's who on both - unlike me:blush:) and we tend to have a giggle in the lounge on subjects that quite often cross over onto facebook and that is often fine - but I think we need to be very careful that other minders are happy to be part of it and are happy to be mentioned publically even if what is being said is done in jest. I have cringed when someone put something on facebook that I said to them in a phone conversation and had to ask them to remove it - what may seem perfectly normal and innocent to most of us may not seem that way to parents or to Network co-ordinators. Mine is a friend of mine on there and has tagged me into photos of her 50th party which I attended.

Please Please bear in mind that facebook is a very public forum where anyone can see what you write and it is you first duty to protect yourself and your family so think twice about what you write on there especially when it concerns your mindees and their families and others who may not wish to be included.

Wise words :) i never talk about my childminding day on fb but have commented on childminding related stuff like the freezing cold training room i had to sit in for hours :mad: My fb is just waffle from my life- mostly outside of my work, i like to keep it private so have set up various privacy settings for my photo's etc and personally i think its better not to have parents as friends on fb - but thats jmho :)

[berkschick]

I posted on there yesterday saying "fee chasing again" and I dont see much of an issue with that as that was all I said. I didnt name names, mention amounts of money or anything. None of my parents are friends anyway on there.

But this is about all I post on there about minding unless its something positive lol but even then never name names etc. I agree you need to be very careful

[snufflepuff]

I'll admit I have been stung by this.
I had an ex-parent on facebook (she had heard I was childminding needed childcare so added me as a friend on there to ask me if I had spaces and arrange to visit etc)
I changed my status one day to something about children's snot- a friends LO had sneezed on me, it was a bit of a joke between us. Anyway, this parent saw the status and presumed it was about her child, even though her child was not with me that day. She went off on one, saying it was part of my job to not have a problem with her childs bodily fluids (!) and demanded that i bring round her deposit and remainder of the months fees because i had 'breached her contract'. I had to explain my perfectly innocent comment to her and it caused me no end of upset. I changed my preferences so she couldn't see anything anymore but she still managed to stalk me somehow, i think she used a mutual friends account to do it. Crazy woman.

I have on occasion written that we have had a lovely day or something along those lines, and still will do.....but nothing more.

[Heaven Scent]

I'll admit I have been stung by this.
I had an ex-parent on facebook (she had heard I was childminding needed childcare so added me as a friend on there to ask me if I had spaces and arrange to visit etc)
I changed my status one day to something about children's snot- a friends LO had sneezed on me, it was a bit of a joke between us. Anyway, this parent saw the status and presumed it was about her child, even though her child was not with me that day. She went off on one, saying it was part of my job to not have a problem with her childs bodily fluids (!) and demanded that i bring round her deposit and remainder of the months fees because i had 'breached her contract'. I had to explain my perfectly innocent comment to her and it caused me no end of upset. I changed my preferences so she couldn't see anything anymore but she still managed to stalk me somehow, i think she used a mutual friends account to do it. Crazy woman.

I have on occasion written that we have had a lovely day or something along those lines, and still will do.....but nothing more.

This is the kind of thing I worry about happening - it is just how things can happen - friend of friends and mis understand and take things out of context I just really worry about it - There was a huge upset at one of the preschools I collected from last year which involved the sacking of some staff members an a total reorganisation of how it was run.

Amongst other things parents complained that the premises was used for the staff Christmas do and they posted photos on facebook.

[em29]

I am constantly aware of this because one set of parents are friends with me on fb and it is awful because i no longer put any updates or message anyone anything at all tongue-in-cheek anymore because it always gets commented on.
Even if i just put in that I am catching up on paperwork, watching a film, had to get up in night with kids etc etc it gets read, commented on and then brought up in the morning. I shouldn't have added her but mum is quite headstrong and bossy and presumed she was friends with me anyway so i accepted - i hate it though and when she finishes with me it will NOT happen again.
Whenever I go out i have to ask everyone no to photograph me as i do not want any come back (even though I wont have more than a couple on a work night).
:panic:

[Mouse]

I am constantly aware of this because one set of parents are friends with me on fb and it is awful because i no longer put any updates or message anyone anything at all tongue-in-cheek anymore because it always gets commented on.
Even if i just put in that I am catching up on paperwork, watching a film, had to get up in night with kids etc etc it gets read, commented on and then brought up in the morning. I shouldn't have added her but mum is quite headstrong and bossy and presumed she was friends with me anyway so i accepted - i hate it though and when she finishes with me it will NOT happen again.
Whenever I go out i have to ask everyone no to photograph me as i do not want any come back (even though I wont have more than a couple on a work night).
:panic:

Why not just remover her & block her, that way she wouldn't be able to see anything you put. Then if she asks, jus tell her you don't use FB anymore.

[Hebs]

you can post statuses and block it from certain people, same with chat :D :D

[The Juggler]

one of the reasons I closed my FB account recently was two separate groups of friends started having a very non constructive argument with each other about something controversial I posted.

It really upset me that one group was having a go at the other and I thought this would never happen if I werent' on FB.

I now have family and overseas friends only for purposes of keeping in touch where I couldnt otherwise.

I NEVER post about childminding good or bad I don't think its appropriate. Whether parents are friends on FB or not you never know who of your friends or your frineds friends might be and they might clock your post one day. Too risky for my liking:panic:

[em29]

Mouse - she is friends with all my friends and will know if I remove her but I will look into blocking and see what I can come up with - Thanks!

[mrs_scottydog]

After having been through a huge family problem due to a different internet site a few years ago I am very careful about anything I post on FB. One of my parents is a friend on FB but that is because we've been friends since before I started thinking about childminding. I certainly wouldn't think about writing anything on there though as I know what problems could occur Hx

[PixiePetal]

I have no parents as FB friends and never mention work on there either.

I save any gripes/questions for the greenies on the forum :thumbsup:

[Louise B]

I agree that it shouldn't be discussed on Facebook. I do have a couple of parents on mine, but they were friends of mine before I minded their children.

Today I have made a comment about passing my environmental health inspection, and glad that they didn't see the mouse droppings... lol. Just hope no-one is silly enough to take it seriously!! lol. xx

[Heaven Scent]

I agree that it shouldn't be discussed on Facebook. I do have a couple of parents on mine, but they were friends of mine before I minded their children.

Today I have made a comment about passing my environmental health inspection, and glad that they didn't see the mouse droppings... lol. Just hope no-one is silly enough to take it seriously!! lol. xx

I see no harm in saying stuff like that and in blowing your own trumpet or in saying been up for hours etc doing paperwork or accounts etc. or spent wher week end etc on training courses - it does them no harm to see the reality of the job - even sayin that you are shattered after a hard day at work thats normal - everyone has days at work that are busier than others but so long as we don't go into any details then its fine and natural - nothing wrong either in having a moan about in general about all the extra paperwork you have to do or being skint because of having to buy extra resources or having to alter your garden etc they are reality checks and people out there need to know that we are not raking it in dodging the tax man and sitting around drinking coffee with kids plonked infront of kids TV all day.

I definately see nothing wrong with commenting on thinkgs like being releived that you have submitted your tax return or something - shows we are above board.

[Beetlejuice]

The person I hate seeing my FB the most is my MIL but it was hard to refuse her friend request :laughing: I have made sure she can only see my limited profile lol!

I do have parents on FB but I never comment about the kids directly and I will say if we've had a good day. What I like is that one of the families constantly sings my praises on there!! One of my Dads is a very quiet man IRL and barely says two words but on FB he says how much his son enjoys coming to me and about the wonderful days out I take him on.

I do mention if I've been on a training course though - especially on a weekend so they can see how much work I do lol!!!

[haribo]

i never have parents as friends on facebook :thumbsup: much safer all round :laughing:

[charleyfarley]

I tend not to say anything about minding on there except when I say I'm on yet another course, which will happen again on Saturday :laughing:

I don't have parents as friends on there, I make sure I don't mention FB to them as we do have mutual friends so they may be on there if that makes sense :panic: Even if they are I wouldn't add them, FB is my escape from parents and mindees :D

Carol xx

[IndigoMoon]

Mouse - she is friends with all my friends and will know if I remove her but I will look into blocking and see what I can come up with - Thanks!

You could always say you're childminding advice team have said it's unacceptable to have parents on facebook so you've had to remove them. ;)

[LOOPYLISA]

The person I hate seeing my FB the most is my MIL but it was hard to refuse her friend request :laughing: I have made sure she can only see my limited profile lol!

I do have parents on FB but I never comment about the kids directly and I will say if we've had a good day. What I like is that one of the families constantly sings my praises on there!! One of my Dads is a very quiet man IRL and barely says two words but on FB he says how much his son enjoys coming to me and about the wonderful days out I take him on.

I do mention if I've been on a training course though - especially on a weekend so they can see how much work I do lol!!!

Ive not added my mil :laughing:

[MAWI]

I agree. Personally I would not entertain putting anything 'out there'. Once you have put any information on facebook, its no longer in your hands. Facebook own everything you do on there and they can do anything they want with the information.
I have a FB myself but only for close family members and friends, but TBH I dont really like it. Im old fashioned and prefer to chat to my friends.

[francinejayne]

Most of my FB posts revolve around food!!!! :laughing:

[Pipsqueak]

I have a separate childmindng account.

I won;t add parents as friends - all apart from one mum. She is terrific.
Besides I rarely post somethig about minding. Thats my personal life i air out on Facebook! lol

[Heaven Scent]

You could always say you're childminding advice team have said it's unacceptable to have parents on facebook so you've had to remove them. ;)

LOL - I'm Lovin' it!!!!!

[Heaven Scent]

Most of my FB posts revolve around food!!!! :laughing:

I'm lovin' this one too - but I don't think you are my friend cause I don't remember posts about food nor do I remember a Francine - I'll have to take a look on my friends list!!!¬!

[babs]

i have parents added to my fb but i have become friends with them since having their children i only have added family a few of you fellow childminders thats it i wont add anyone i dont know, i had an aunty try to add me but i refused explained to mum why she was ok with it...

[Dare4Distance]

Some people are way too paranoid about Facebook.

It's simple.

Don't add parents as friends, but if you do change your privacy settings so they can't see your statuses and things.

I don't see why saying something here is safer than Facebook. Anyone can view this website. Even the members area. When I post things on my Facebook only the people I want to view it can.

[SandCastles]

Thanks for the reminder, my facebook page has just started to get busy and I m going to take extra care from now on.

[karen m]

i have 2 accounts,1 for personal 1 for my childminder friends