New Childminder Needs Help

[LisaMed]

Hi, I started minding last Monday and even though the child I am minding is an angel my daughter has turned into a devil......

I have my daughter at home with me full time as she is only 2, the little girl I am minding is the same age. My daughter is hitting her, taking toys off her and shouting "MINE"!!!!!

HELP...I can't just ignore this bahaviour and I am sure she needs time to get used to mummy having another little girl round the house. I just need some tips to help me deal with the day.

Getting a little desperate and embarrased when we are out in public :mad:

[buzzy bee]

Poor you!

I don't have any first hand experience as my own little one is only 10 months, but I do think this is completely natural - Not sure what you were doing before, but up until now I'm guessing she hasn't had to share you (or her toys) with anyone else!

I do find the 'mine' thing funny when my mindees similar ages to your's snatch things from my little boy and say 'mine'. I think, er, actually, technically, they're kinda his!!

But I try not to think of the toys as his... in fact we've put all his own toys that were presents in a toy box in his room, and all the toys in the playroom for mindees are either car boot / charity shop or toy library - do you have a toy library near you? there's one here for childminders that's completely free. Could you try and do that, so your little girl can have her own toys in her room?

I'm sure you'd still get the 'mine' thing becayuse of the age!

She will get used to sharing you, and in the long run it's good for her to learn that she can't always have you to herself...

Hope it gets better for you. Sorrty i can't offer any better advice!!

[sarah707]

What you describe happens quite often.

Your child is dealing with a complete change in her life style ... she is sharing her house, her mummy, her toys, your time ...

Plus 2 is a very hard age to understand about sharing and taking turns.

The best thing you can do is to be consistent and gently keep explaining to her that her behaviour is not acceptable.

She will get there :thumbsup:

Good luck! :D

[blue bear]

I had this, just takes time and patience to get over it, don't get cross she is just working through the change.

Someone told me to devote an hour a day to my child where he could choose what we did, this worked brilliantly, sometimes it happened in the day if mindee slept, sometimes it would be after I'd finished but I always made the time.

[JCrakers]

Shes basically feeling like she would if youd had a new baby. It's like sibling rivalry. Shes now having to share you and can't understand and doesnt like it.

I'd make sure I gave her loads of hugs and reassurance but still be firm and let her know that the behaviour isnt acceptable. :)
Spend some extra time with her when mindees have gone home etc. Just to reassure her that shes still no.1 ;)

I had a little bit of bad behaviour from my 5yr old when I first started. She still can be quite demanding when she nows I have my hands full. :rolleyes:
Shes the hardest of all the children. Its just the sharing of mummy thats quite difficult to understand

Over time, it should get better...Good luck

Becky xx

[AliceK]

I had this, just takes time and patience to get over it, don't get cross she is just working through the change.

Someone told me to devote an hour a day to my child where he could choose what we did, this worked brilliantly, sometimes it happened in the day if mindee slept, sometimes it would be after I'd finished but I always made the time.

I understand exactly how you feel I was in the same position when I first started out and my first mindee was very close in age to my DD who was 2 at the time. Look at it from her point of view suddenly she has to share you, "her" toys etc with another LO. At that age everything is "mine, mine mine" so that's normal. She will settle down although I have said now that this particular mindee has just left that I wont have another one so close in age to my DD for a while. I now have a 12mth old and a 4mth old starting soon and then some after schoolies. It's a great idea about making sure at some point you just give her some one on one time with you for just you two to play, I used to do this and it helps a lot and keep on being consistent with her and the rules about sharing etc.
Good luck

xxxx

[Lol]

I had exactly the same problem when my daughter was around 2. The way I dealt with it was to ensure that she still had her special toys (Christmas, birthday presents) and that the toys I put out when I was minding were "shared" toys. She soon learnt that when the mindees weren't around that she could have her special toys out.

I found it got easier when my children were a bit older and they could keep their special toys in their bedrooms :)