View Full Version : Opinions from a CM point of view

13-10-2010, 02:26 PM
On another forum I belong to as a mummy (not netmums I hasten to add) a thread was started about sending LO to nursery in PJs because they'd had bad night and didn't wake up until last minute so mum asked nursery to get LO dressed because she had a meeting to attend.

The nursery caught her on way out and said that in future they would be unable to dress her LO and please send her to nursery dressed.

She thought this a silly rule and asked for other's opinions.

I was just wondering what your opinions were if this had happened in your setting.

Personally I wouldn't expect my mindees to arrive in their PJs and be expected to dress them but then again I have parents who wouldn't expect me to do that anyway.

Oh and by the way LO had been taken straight out of bed - no wash/wipe or nappy change - or so I understand.

13-10-2010, 02:38 PM
I think I may know which forum you mean.
I wouldn't be too pleased if a LO came to me in PJs, because I have a school run to do. I leave as soon as everyone is here so changing a child/ washing them would make us late for school.
Otherwise, on occassion, I wouldn't mind. If it was happening lots i'd be a bit concerned really and would wonder why it was happening so much.

13-10-2010, 02:44 PM
I leave as soon as everyone is here so changing a child/ washing them would make us late for school.

Hence why I wouldn't like it...

But the I suppose as CMs we can be a little more flexible and are not dealing with 20 odd other childre all arriving at the same time.

13-10-2010, 02:45 PM
If the child had an early start with me ( I have one at 7am), then yes, I'd occasionally understand it. But in this case I'm with the nursery - it's not theirjob to change and dress the child, imagine if they all started doing it!!!!!

13-10-2010, 02:57 PM
i had a baby come to me and sometimes changed them. mum was on a very early shift and he was here before my lot got up

13-10-2010, 02:59 PM
It doesn't worry me at all and over the years I have often had children arrive in PJs, straight out of bed.
I get them changed, give them brekkie (provided by parents) and get on without giving it a second thought. Infact, when I have first vists with parents I tell them not to worry if lo isn't ready when they come to me.

13-10-2010, 03:04 PM
if its a real early starter then yes you can understand that.
but to arrive at nursery or even mine in PJ's having just woken up , no wash etc and consequently perhaps no breakfast then that is a no no to me.

if they have had that bad a night then are they well enough to be at the setting is one of the first questions I would ask
what about breakfast?

I think this mother is being unreasonable, unrealistic and frankly expecting other people to do her job for her.

As a parent I would NOT dream of taking my childto nursery or anywhere else - I would be frankly mortified!

13-10-2010, 03:10 PM
I do not have any school runs to do so am not rushing out of the door at 0815 like many, but I would be concerned about children arriving in PJs. On one occasion it happened but had been preceded by a quick phone call asking if I would have a problem with it - the courtesy of the parent in making a call was appreciated and I was happy to help.

On another occasion a different child simply turned up with the parent and a bag of clothes to dress it in - my reaction was to be honest, not so accommodating.

13-10-2010, 03:23 PM
I have 2 that arrive in their PJ's in the morning straight out of bed and its just routine now, they come quite early, one at 6.30am and the other 7am, the one at 7am is always late so goodness knows what mum would do if she had to deal with dressing him in the morning too! I was asked before they started with me if this would be a problem and to be honest no its not, one I have had since he was 6 months so having a wash and gettin dressed in the morning provided lots of time for cuddles and tickles and giggles! The other one is now 4 and of course can dress himself, although has to have matching socks and pants, on his request!

13-10-2010, 03:36 PM
I had a very young mum who started work at 7.15. I breakfasted the children. She was struggling to get her two ready and round here dressed, so said as long as it wasnt a dirty nappy, didnt mind getting them dressed in the morning after their breakfast and it became routine. I felt it was easier for all concerned to do it this way and helped out a mum who was struggling on her own

13-10-2010, 03:46 PM
I wouldnt mind if asked nicely. But they would have to understand that if changing the child would make us late for the school run the child would be going in pjs so they would need appropriate outer clothing.

13-10-2010, 04:36 PM
I used to look after a LO who arrived at mine at stupid oclock as mum was a nurse - to be honest she was lifted from her cot and into the car and arrived at mine in full sleepy head mode.

I knew that was going to be the case and she often carried on sleeping at mine for a while longer which she wouldn't have been able to do had she been washed changed and dressed.

BUT that is the beauty of home- based care. I would agree with the nursery that it was not acceptable.

Marian x

13-10-2010, 05:11 PM
i had a nearly 4 yr old arrive at mine in PJ once - he had been giving mum a hard time about getting dressed as he didn't want her to go to work, and it made her late and got him lots of attention ... this went on for a few weeks.

so i suggested that the next day she didn't fight, just put him in the car in his pjs ( or whatever state of dress he was ( not! ) in ) and come to me along with a bag of clothes!

he was so shocked, esp as we had to do the school run with him in pjs !!! that he realised mum wasn't going to play the game anymore and he got himself dressed with no fighting!

we didn't make a fuss about it with him, just ignored the fact he was in pjs! ( they looked like shorts & tshirt! )


13-10-2010, 05:18 PM
Well thats the opinions I kind of thought we would all have. Home-based care can allow for this if necessary and agreed beforehand and circumstances allow this to happen - ie early starts or doesn't interfere with the school run. I couldn't do it with my current mindees because of the time they arrive.

However I feel with a nursery it is just not appropriate to expect the nursery workers to wash and dress a child when they have so many others to care for. After all we do so much that nursery workers wouldn't do because its not considered part of their job.

The lady in question asked if it was unreasonable of the nursery to say they would no longer dress her LO and she wanted to know what would happen if she spilt something and needed changing - would they leave her??

13-10-2010, 05:45 PM
In the past I've ben quite happy for early starters (7am or before) to come in their pj's. I felt is was probably crueler to wake the child up earlier than totally necessary and force them to have a breakfast they may not want at such an early time, besides they would still be at my house for a good long while before school runs etc so I would have plenty of time to sort them out and as we don't have breakfast until 7.45 to 8ish then they would be welcome to join us.

If the nursery offers really early opening then I think this is something they should consider addressing, however if they have 'normal' opening times (my nearest private nursery is 8am) then I would expect parents to send them dressed. I certainly wouldn't appreciate children arriving after 7.30am in pj's as it would then impact on everything else.

13-10-2010, 05:50 PM
The lady in question asked if it was unreasonable of the nursery to say they would no longer dress her LO and she wanted to know what would happen if she spilt something and needed changing - would they leave her??

This is hardly the same thing! You would expect to have to deal with a spillage, you don't expect to have to do the parents job!

I do have some delivered in their pj's but thats when it is a drop off between 6:30 and 7am - so expected. And even then, the nappy has at least be changed


13-10-2010, 05:59 PM
one off no problem especially if early ! but not every day :thumbsup:

13-10-2010, 06:36 PM
I am torn....

As has been said on the one hand this is the beauty of home based child care and i think in situations where the parents are shift workers etc then its great if minders can accommodate their wishes.

However i dont think its good at a nursery and good example for the child, they wont be able to go to school in their PJs and then on from there, they wont be able to go to a job in PJS......this is how we learn life lessons from when we are small and routines are put in place.

Plus of course not only was the child not dressed, but hadnt had a wash or anything!!!!

13-10-2010, 06:46 PM
My friend said that she would dress a baby she had if they were running late or had a bad night and stuff but now, still at 16 months old they bring her everyday in pyjamas, still in dirty nappy from overnight and unwashed, and very often add that she hasn't had breakfast and can she give her some?? My friend has recently seen the lgiht and sent a letter out to all parents asking that they arrive ready to go!!

jen x

13-10-2010, 06:46 PM
I can understand it from a Nursery point of view why they wouldn't want to do it, but as a childminder it wouldn't bother me.

I once used a childminder and she was of the same opinion and even offered to bath and get ready for bed.

In my opinion its personal choice for a childminder and whether it fits into your routine x

13-10-2010, 07:25 PM
I understand from a nursery point of view but I would do it if they were not affecting a school run or the other children I would happily get them ready.

My 10yr old mindee came to me in full pjs and dressing gown with slippers (7am) and stayed in it ALL day during school hols. Mum said she wanted a pj day so we all sat under duvets, got the dvds out and had a movie day. We had a fantastic time :clapping:

As long as the parents and children are happy then so am I :thumbsup:

buzzy bee
13-10-2010, 07:28 PM
One of my babies alsways comes in his PJs... the first day the mum text to ask if it was okay cos she was running late and i said no problem, and since then it's been every day!!

One day I think he was actually wearing PJs but they were the sort that could have been clothes and as i didn't wanna offend the mum (your baby's outfit looked like PJs - ha ha!!) i just left him in them LOL!! Since then he's come in a babygro so I can make no mistake!!

Don't really mind too much but if i had a school run i'd definitely have to say something!

13-10-2010, 07:33 PM
If it's a one off because they've overslept, had to be up earlier or whatever then fine but if it's because parents simply can't be bothered to wash, change and give them breakfast then nooooooooooooo!

Miffy xx

13-10-2010, 07:49 PM
one of my lo's comes in pj's sometimes, i don't mind its usually when hes woken early had a nappy change, bottle gone back to sleep then hes just picked up put in car seat mostly still asleep when he gets here sister dressed ready for school, take him out of seat into buggy make a bottle just case he wakes then off to do school run its only takes me 15 minutes round trip there and back less sometimes.. when we get back he usually wakes up has breakfast, get him changed so no hassle ...

i can understand a nursery saying no as can you imagine 20 children turning up in pj's..:eek:

13-10-2010, 07:55 PM
I could understand it also from a nursery (school ) point of view

If it wasnt a regular occurance ............it wouldnt bother me then i would make it known it shouldnt happen regularlly as my routine is mindee dropped off at 8.30 we leave to go to school .

I d make it clear i didnt have time to change child before leaveing therefore if it where to happen again id have to keep them in pjs ........
(may sound cruel but straight to the point )

They wouldnt leave for work in there pjs would they

Dont think they would do it again .

Chatterbox Childcare
13-10-2010, 08:03 PM
If I just had the one child then I wouldn't mind or if they were arriving before 7 or leaving after 7 but I cannot leave the other children I look after to dress one. If I did this with all of my children I just couldn't.

13-10-2010, 08:16 PM
I've been the working mummy wanting to just wake my sleeping babe up just before we leave and take her to the CM. At the very least, change her and she have breakfast there. I didn't, but I've wanted to, esp after a hard night with teething or a cold (but not sick enough to not go there).

I want to make life as easy as possible for LO's and their parents. If they come in their PJ's, it only takes a minute to get them dressed. If they haven't had breaky then surely there's something to nibble when on the school run if not time for breakfast if it's a particularly early start.

I wouldn't expect it every day but if it happened I would be more than understanding. If it was everyday then I would think the family needed to look at their organisation. Although if it was an early start and I had the time I would also just offer to do the dressing / breakfast. I would expect a night time nappy to get changed though.

Chimps Childminding
13-10-2010, 08:31 PM
I have had this happen quite a few times, as long as they arrive early enough that I have time to get them dressed (if I have to go out) it doesn't bother me!! One of my mindees used to come in the holidays still in her PJ's with duvet and pillow and just snuggle up on the sofa (she arrived at 7.30) :D

Can understand why nursery wouldn't like it though, could you imagine if all parents decided one day to send their lo's still in their pj's :eek:

The Juggler
13-10-2010, 08:57 PM
on the odd mad occasions (such as oversleeping) I'd not mind but not if it was a regular occurence and if they turn up just as I'm leaving on school run they would be told child will be dress only after the school run. Blankets and coats would have to make do until i get back.

13-10-2010, 10:08 PM
i have early starters so i'm the one who said to parents that if they haven't got the time it's not a problem.

if the lo can sleep the extra 15min he needs to be in good mood all day, who cares ah aha ha h :laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

but as a nursery it's not practical ther are too many little people!:D