behaviour advice needed please

[sandy64]

morning all i mind a 16mth old and the only way to discribe her is the little girl with the curl when shes good shes loveable happy and vey good but when she isnt shes so bad angry aggresive screamer, this ive notive has got worse in the last month. for instance yesterday came 10 ish i was playing with a 3 yr old with duplo trainset figures she arives with mum. mum says shes hurt her face i asked how? she has a large scratch shed picked a chair up and threw it and hit hurself and has also thrown herself on floor twice and hit her head. she walks into lounge picks trainset up throws across room then picks train up and hits 3yrold across face it happened so quickly. i told her NO and sat her to one side whilst i hugged lo.
this is how she is when i pick her up to remove from somethink or change nappy etc she either kicks me slaps me or trys to head butt me. when dad picks her up she slaps him across face nips,pulls hair he laughs, i have told him that he must tell her no, as hes not helping her.
i praise the good behave all the time shes like 2 lo. if anyone has any ideas i would be grateful as i cant turn my back for 1 min any more sorry its long:)

[Ripeberry]

Well, seems like dad thinks it's funny that his darling daughter is such a fighter :mad:
Bet he won't be laughing when she's bigger and hits harder. As we all know this kind of hitting behaviour must not be allowed in the very first place.

Both my own daughters went through this phase and we dealt with it by saying NO! and never thinking that it was funny.

They just need to be firm with her and praise good behaviour like maybe stroking faces or arms.

[ChocolateChip]

Do you warn her that you are going to do something? Maybe she just doesn't want to come away so perhaps you can work on giving her a warning like 'it's going to be nappy time in a minute' or something, and re-iterate that when it's done she can go back to playing.
But I agree that everyone including dad has to be firm with her else she won't learn that it's unacceptable.

[sarah707]

Poor little lady it sounds like she has a surge of hormones going on and doesn't know what to do with them.

parents have got to be on side with behaviour though or you'll be fighting a battle by yourself.

Consistency is always the key and what you are doing sounds right.

If she can't be trusted while you turn your back you have no alternative than to take her with you and sit her somewhere safe while you cook etc.

I think for now at least that way you are keeping the other children safe.

Explain to parents what you are doing and why, it might help them understand how dangerous she is becoming :(

Hugs xx

[sandy64]

thankyou for your replies i will have another chat to dad mums already onside dad thinks shes funny, but i have to think of others as well and they dont think its funny so will keep it up and hopefully it will get easier.:)